


Overlooked

by belair82



Category: Carol (2015), The Price of Salt - Patricia Highsmith
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But a happy ending!, Carol struggling with the death of her wife, Eventual Smut, F/F, Lesbian Sex, Lesbians, Maybe the best smut I've ever written, Not the happiest thing I've ever written, Previous Self-Harm, Sloooooow Burn, Therese is a mom, Yes Therese has a child, hot lesbian sex, like really hot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-24
Updated: 2018-07-18
Packaged: 2019-04-27 10:14:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 54,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14423226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/belair82/pseuds/belair82
Summary: Carol is an ER doctor who recently moved back home from NYC to Maryland to help take care of her parents. Her wife of fifteen years is dead and Carol is struggling with it.Therese is a writer and a mother, with her own personal struggles and secrets.POV from both Carol and Therese.Trigger warning here, people, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! This story deals with a suicide and self-harm. However, there are no major character deaths. I'm not in the business of killing off two of my favorite women.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge thanks to Ligeria for all her help in making my story readable!

Carol Aird had been back in her hometown for over two months after living in New York City for the last twenty years. Her father’s health had begun to decline and she decided that it was time to move home with her six year old daughter, Rindy. It made sense for her to move closer to them; being a doctor had its advantages when someone you loved was in poor health … at least when you knew they were in poor health.

Carol had taken a job as an ER doctor at Heartview Medical. She was one of the most revered doctors in New York and was often sought out for her medical opinion, but she was ready to get back home. After her wife died three years ago, Carol started looking for jobs in her hometown or close to it. Her colleagues had been devastated to see her go, but she needed to take care of her parents and also wanted her daughter to know her grandparents. Carol’s parents were excited to have her back home.

She was still acclimating to her role and new life in her home state of Maryland. The pace was much slower than she was used to, but she was enjoying it. She needed to slow down and take more time for herself, Rindy, and her parents. Losing Jenna had taken a toll on her physically and emotionally. To top it off, Rindy was two and a half at the time and Carol knew that she had to keep going for her. She had an excellent support system that stepped up and helped with Rindy, but at thirty-seven, Carol never thought that she was going to lose the woman that she had spent fifteen years with. Unfortunately, life throws curves when least expected. To say she wanted to give up was an understatement. Carol was a strong woman and knew that she was, but it almost broke her when she lost Jenna.

So, moving back home was the right decision for her. She’d had an excellent career so far and now she wanted to take some time for her family. She bought a house down the street from her parents that was perfect for her and Rindy. Nothing too big or flashy; none of that mattered to her. She only wanted a yard for gardening since it was something that couldn’t be done in an apartment in New York City. She knew that would keep her hands busy and she had always wanted to try her luck at it.

After dropping Rindy off at her parents’ house, Carol headed into work for her shift. It was a Saturday and she knew that her parents were looking forward to spoiling their granddaughter. Carol was excited that her family was able to spend so much time together. It broke her heart that Jenna couldn’t be there; she had always gotten along really well with Carol’s parents.

Carol was still learning to navigate the world without a partner by her side. She was supposed to grow old with Jenna. This move would have been something that she would have liked. Jenna wasn’t very close to her own family and Carol’s had taken her in without incident. Carol and Jenna had once talked about moving out of the city, but nothing had ever come of it. The “what ifs” always bothered Carol. What if they had moved sooner? What if Carol would have seen the signs? What if Jenna was still with her? What if they had moved here together? She tried to not let the negative thoughts creep in, but it was difficult when she was alone or late at night before she fell asleep. 

It didn’t seem to be too bad of a day in the ER. There were some stitches, a few possible flus, colds, and an unfortunate car accident that caused a fatality. Losing patients was difficult for Carol since Jenna’s death. It had always taken a toll on her, but sometimes there was nothing that could be done; she had seen it happen too many times. After losing her patient, Carol went to the bathroom to splash some water on her face – the day was beginning to wear on her and she was happy that it was almost over.

Carol checked her watch; her shift was over and the next doctor was already there. She went to her locker to change and grabbed her bag. Her mother had sent her a text that she had dinner waiting for her when she got home from work. She knew that Rindy would be asleep when she got to her mother’s house and it was then that she decided to cut back on working so much. Spending more time with Rindy and her parents was one of the main reasons for moving back home and she seemed to spend most of her time at the hospital instead of at home.

She quickly showered and made it to her parents’ house ten minutes later. True to her word, her mother had dinner waiting for her and it was warm. _How does she do that? How does she know exactly when I’ll be here?_ Carol wondered if maybe one day that she would be doing the same for Rindy. Carol sat down at the table to eat as her mother walked into the kitchen.

“Hey, care bear.”

“Mom, I’m forty, not four.”

“Yeah, but you’re still my baby no matter what,” she said and kissed the top of Carol’s head. “Did you lose someone today?”

“Why do you ask that?”

“You always have the same look when you lose a patient. It was the same look that your father had.”

Carol sighed. “Yes, I lost a patient today. Car accident. How’s Rindy?” Carol asked, trying to change the subject.

“She’s fine. She kept us busy today, but she’s fast asleep.”

“I miss her.”

“You should slow down, sweetheart. You’ve only been here two months and all you do is work.”

“I know, I’m going to slow down. It’s one of the reasons why I moved back and it feels like I’m working more than I was before, but I’m not going to lose out on time with all of you anymore.”

“What about getting out more?” she asked gently. “I think you should get out a little more.”

“Mom, I’ve been busy working.”

“I know, but when you slow down a bit, maybe you could go out? You know, like find a woman to date?”

“Mom, could you not?” Carol asked, exasperated by the question.

“What? I don’t want to see you become a recluse and only spending your time between us and the hospital.”

“Mom, I’m fine,” Carol said without sounding too convincing. Was she fine? Probably, but the fact was that Carol was somewhat lonely and she hadn’t tried to date.

“Is that all you want to be? Fine?”

“Fine is better than I was before,” she muttered.

“I know, sweetheart. I’m your mother and I worry about you.”

“I appreciate that Mom, but I’ll be okay. Really.”

“You want me to help find you a date?”

“Mom! No! I don’t need my mother to help find me a date, thank you very much.”

“Well? You’re a catch, Carol. You’re kind, intelligent, you have a huge heart. Any woman would be lucky to have you.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want just _any_ woman,” Carol said, devouring her dinner. Once she had started to eat, she realized how hungry she had been. She hadn’t eaten much during the day and was thankful that her mother had a plate waiting for her. 

“What about Therese, down the street?”

“Huh?”

“You remember Therese? You dated her older brother when you were still pretending to be straight.”

“Mom!” Carol was always shocked at her mother’s candor.

“What? You were trying to be straight, but we all knew you weren’t. You just needed to figure it out for yourself.”

“I guess you’re right.” Carol took another bite and looked up at her mom. “Wait, are you saying that Therese lives down the street?”

“Yeah, a few houses down from you on the opposite side. I’m not surprised that you haven’t noticed.”

“Which house? The blue one with the red shutters?”

“I guess you _have_ noticed, huh?” She smirked. “I knew that you’d notice a beautiful woman.”

“I’ve seen her a few times, but I didn’t realize that was Therese. I haven’t seen her in probably more than twenty years.”

“Well, she’s certainly all grown up now and has a son. Your father and I have babysat Evan a few times.”

“Wow, she has a son?”

“Yeah, I think he’s a year older than Rindy.”

“Wait, are you saying that she’s gay?” Carol asked, still trying to process the information.

“I think she’s into men and women.”

“Therese?” Carol asked, shocked.

“Yeah, I’ve seen her go on dates with a few women.”

“Wow, I had no idea.”

“Well, why don’t you ask her out?”

“Ha! Yeah, I’m going to date the younger sister of the guy I used to date in high school,” Carol said, sarcastically.

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Mom, I’m not going to do that.”

“Carol … when was the last time you went on a date?”

“I don’t know.”

“Yes, you do. Have you dated anyone since Jenna died?”

“Mom, I’m not going to discuss this with you.”

“I’ll take that as a no.”

“Mom …”

“If you don’t use it, it’ll shrivel up,” she said with a laugh.

“Oh my god, I’m not talking about my sex life with you,” Carol said, blushing and trying to cover her face.

“Carol, it’s been almost three and a half years. You need to get out more.”

“I appreciate your concern, but when I’m ready to date, I’ll do whatever I need to do to find a date. I don’t need for my mother to pimp me out.”

“I’m not pimping you out, sweetheart. I only want you to be happy.”

“I _am_ happy. I have you and Dad and Rindy.”

“You know what I mean, Carol. I’m just worried that you’re not making time for yourself. You’re working so much and when you’re not, you’re with Rindy. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love my granddaughter, but spending all of your free time with a child is no way to live.”

“Mom, I know. I really have no desire to date, though.”

“You have no desire or you’re scared?”

Carol stopped and pondered the question. Did she have the desire to be with a woman and be intimate again? Hell yes, she missed the feeling of a woman pressed against her, of a woman coming undone beneath her, of a woman’s lips against hers. But not only that, Carol missed the simple pleasures of being in a relationship. She missed having a partner to come home to, fall asleep with and wake up with. Was she scared to date? Absolutely! She was scared for so many reasons and it’s why she hadn’t been on a date with anyone since Jenna and why she hadn’t had sex with anyone either. 

“Honestly, Mom? I’m fucking terrified.”

“What bothers you the most about it?”

Carol took in a deep breath and let it out. “Falling for someone who’s going to leave me again.”

“You feel that she left you?”

“What would you call it, Mom?”

“What it is: suicide. Why do you feel that she left you?”

“Because she did. She never talked to me about the way that she was feeling. She never came to me and tried to get help. She took the easy way out and left Rindy and I behind. She left me, Mom!” Carol spat the words like venom. “She didn’t even try,” Carol said defeated. “And what’s worse is that I didn’t even see the signs. Isn’t that sad? I’m a fucking doctor and didn’t even see it. I have to live with that. How am I supposed to help patients when I couldn’t even help my wife?”

“Honey, some people are good at disguising what’s going on inside their head. I wish you wouldn’t blame yourself for this.”

“I can’t help it, Mom. I do and I don’t know if I’ll ever not blame myself for it.”

“Have you found a psychiatrist down here yet?”

“Not yet, but Dr. Harrison is still in contact with me on the phone. I still have phone calls with him. He’s working to find someone that he trusts to send me to see.”

“Good. In the meantime, you should really try to get out more.”

Carol looked up at her mom and rolled her eyes.

“I’m serious, Carol.”

“Okay, okay. I’ll work on it.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“All right, sweetheart, I’m going to bed. You can just stay here tonight. No sense in going home. I already made up the couch for you or you can sleep with Rindy. I love you, baby.”

“Love you too, Mom.”

Carol finished her dinner and decided not to wake her daughter. She laid down on the couch and tried to find something to watch on tv. She was grateful for her relationship with her mother - they had always been extremely close and she could talk to her about anything. She also knew that her mother was right; she needed to get out more and she needed to slow down at the hospital and take time for herself. There had been so many opportunities for overtime that Carol didn’t want to pass up the overtime, but from this point on, she was going to slow down.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since you're all so eager to get another chapter, I've decided to cave and post the next one. Hope you enjoy!

Carol woke up the next morning to the sound of cartoons. She was sure that Rindy would have awakened her. Rindy was sitting in front of the television, so Carol seized the opportunity to sneak up, pounce on her, and tickle her relentlessly. Rindy’s laugh was adorable and Carol never tired of hearing it. 

“Mommy, stop!” Rindy screamed in between trying to catch her breath.

Carol relented and kissed Rindy all over her face. She knew that she could definitely get used to waking up with Rindy more often.

“Okay, okay. Did you sleep all right, sweet pea?” she asked her daughter.

“Yes. Did I wake you up, Mommy? I wanted to jump on you, but Grandma told me to let you sleep because you had a bad night.”

“You didn’t wake me, darling,” Carol said and brushed the hair from Rindy’s face. 

“Did you have a bad night?”

“Just another long shift, sweetheart. That’s all. Have you eaten?”

“Mmhmm. Grandma made breakfast.”

“All right, you watch your cartoons. I’m going to get something to eat.” As soon as Carol stood up from the floor, the doorbell rang. “I’ll get it, Mom,” Carol said and went to open the door.

* * *

Therese rang the doorbell and waited for Gloria to answer the door. She was sure that she’d be awake and Therese wanted to return the dish she had borrowed from her. She had a day of writing planned and didn’t want any distractions, but what she hadn’t counted on that morning was her life taking a complete turn in an unexpected direction.

When the door opened, Therese was slightly mesmerized, but tried to play it off. She hadn’t seen Carol in almost twenty years. She was aware that she moved in to a house not far from hers, but she had yet to have a conversation with her. Therese was sure that Carol worked a lot. 

The last time that Therese had seen her, she was Carolyn Ross: gorgeous cheerleader. She may not have been a cheerleader anymore, but she was still the most gorgeous woman that Therese had ever seen. Suddenly, she was twelve years old again and smitten. When Carol dated Therese’s brother, Adam, Therese was crazy about the blonde senior that hung around the house.

Therese stood mute with her mouth hung open like a fish for what seemed like an eternity. Carol still looked incredible after twenty years and even though it was obvious that she had just woken up and was still tired, Therese was sure there had never been a more beautiful woman that she had ever seen.

“Hello,” she finally managed to say. “I was just dropping this off for Gloria. Um, I don’t know if you remember me …”

“Therese. Of course I remember you,” she said, smiling. “Come in.”

“I was just dropping this off for your mother. She let me borrow it last week and I haven’t had a chance to bring it back.” Therese stopped herself before she started rambling. “Is she here?”

“She is, but you can just set it on that table over there. I’ll see that she gets it. How have you been? It’s been what … twenty years?”

“Something like that.” Therese offered a shy smile. “I’ve been okay. Your parents have been so excited for you to move back home. I’m glad that I’ve finally had a chance to say hello. Every time I’ve had a chance to stop by your house, you’ve been away.”

“Ah yes, probably at work. I’ll be slowing that down from now on, though.”

“What about you? How are you doing?”

“I’m okay. Good and bad days. I’m sure my mom has told you about my situation.”

“Only that your wife passed. I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Thank you.”

“If you ever want to talk or need a friend, you can call me.”

“Okay. I think I just may take you up on that offer.”

“Therese!” Rindy screamed and barreled into the younger woman.

“Hey, Rindy.”

“Do you wanna watch cartoons with me?” Rindy asked, excitedly.

“It seems that my daughter has seen you before I have,” Carol said. “Sweetheart,” Carol said to Rindy. “I’m sure she doesn’t want to watch cartoons. Why don’t you go back and watch them and I’ll just be a minute.” Carol watched Rindy say goodbye to Therese and walk back to the living room.

“I was hoping to speak to your mother if it’s possible. I was wondering if she would mind watching Evan for me tonight after his father drops him off.”

“If you want, I can watch him. I’m off for the next three days and I have nothing planned.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to be a bother.”

“Not a problem.”

They exchanged numbers and Therese left feeling refreshed. Seeing Carol had been exciting and her body hummed with pleasure after talking to her.

* * *

“Offering to watch Therese’s son, huh?” Gloria asked with a smirk.

“I was trying to be polite.”

“Oh, is that what it was?”

“You told me to make friends.”

“And it just so happens to be with a beautiful woman who doesn’t live far from you.”

“Quit trying to play matchmaker.”

“You got her number though, right?”

“Yes,” Carol said and shook her head.

“Mmhmm, that’s what I thought.”

“What?”

“Carol? Don’t tell me you’re that naive.”

“What are you talking about, Mom?”

“That girl is so smitten with you.”

“How do you know?”

“I saw the whole thing.”

“I’m not trying to date her. It would be nice to have a friend.”

“And there’s nothing wrong with that. Why didn’t you ask her to go with you and Rindy today?”

“To the lake?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t know. Wouldn’t that be too weird?”

“Only if you make it out to be weird. It would be a good way to get to know her. I mean, who doesn’t want to swim on a beautiful day, right? Just go ask her.”

Carol took a deep breath and thought about it. Yes, it would be nice to have a friend and another adult to talk to, but she wasn’t sure if she was ready yet to get involved with a woman. If Therese really was “smitten” with her, then she didn’t want to give off the wrong impression. She knew she was overthinking this too much and decided that she had nothing to lose by asking her to go swimming with her and Rindy for the day.

“Okay, you’re right.”

“I’m always right.”

“I’ll be back.”

Carol walked down the street to Therese’s house. She rehearsed what she would ask her on her way there. God, she really was overthinking this way too much, but she couldn’t figure out why. She hadn’t overthought what she would say to a woman since … Jenna. Nope, she wasn’t going there. She wasn’t going to fall for a woman. Carol had decided that she was going to be alone for a while. A conscious decision that she had made. Falling for a woman was the last thing on her list. The last time that happened had ended in tragedy and she wasn’t going to risk that again.

Carol had been lost in her thoughts and realized that she passed Therese’s house. She laughed to herself and turned around. When she made it to Therese’s door, she took a deep breath before ringing the doorbell.

“Hello, again,” Carol said when Therese opened the door.

“We really need to stop meeting like this.”

“Right? Um, I was wondering if you’re not too busy today, would you like to go for a bike ride with me and Rindy to the lake today. We’re going swimming and having a picnic. I thought maybe you’d like to get out of the house today.” Why was she so nervous? She was asking a friend to hang out – it shouldn’t be so nerve wracking. Except that she was scared of being rejected.

“Oh … I was planning on writing today.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” _Damn._ “You’re a writer?”

“Freelance.”

“Interesting.” Carol took a deep breath. “All right, well then I’ll leave you to it.” Carol turned around to leave, hoping that she didn’t seem too wounded.

“Wait!”

“Yes?”

“You really want me to go? I mean, I don’t want to intrude on your time with Rindy.”

“No intrusion.” Carol smiled. “I think Rindy likes you and I _would_ like you to go with us, but I don’t want to bother you if you’re working.”

“It would be nice to get out and enjoy the day. What time are you leaving?”

“Eleven. I hope you have a bike.”

“I do.”

“Be prepared to ride a little slower with Rindy.” Carol laughed.

“I can do that. I’ll be ready at eleven.”

“See you then.”

* * *

Therese watched as Carol laid out the blanket and Rindy stripped to her bathing suit as soon as they got to the lake. The little girl was clearly excited to swim.

“Rindy! You know you can’t go in the water without your vest!” Carol called out. The little girl huffed and ran back to her mother for her life vest. “Don’t be angry, I don’t want anything happening to you, sweetheart,” Carol said, calmly.

“I know, I know,” Rindy said, rolling her eyes. She ran back to the water after Carol put her vest on her.

“Not too far, darling!” she called out to Rindy. “That girl loves to swim.”

“I can tell.”

That morning, Therese chose her board shorts and a bikini top. She never wore the bikini bottoms. The shorts were long enough that no one was able to see what she was hiding and she surely didn’t want Carol to see. But Carol, on the other hand, was in a bikini underneath the t-shirt and shorts that she just took off. It was difficult for Therese to breathe, let alone not stare. She sat down on the blanket and watched Rindy play in the water.

“It’s too bad Evan’s not here, they’d be having a blast in the water. He loves to swim, too.”

“I think most kids do.”

“So, are you enjoying being back home?” Therese asked.

“I am. It’s a slower pace than New York City, but I think I need it. I’m still acclimating.”

“That’s good. I always wondered what it was like to live there.”

“It’s interesting, for sure. I do miss the fact that you can get whatever you want, whenever you want. Although sometimes, that can be a bad thing,” Carol said with a laugh. “After three and half years on my own up there, I realized I couldn’t raise Rindy on my own in the city. She’s too young and I didn’t want her to be raised by strangers.”

“That’s understandable.”

“What about you? What’s Therese Belivet’s story?”

“Well, I went to school at WVU. I didn’t want to go too far from home. Love and all that.” Therese rolled her eyes. “I thought I was in love with Evan’s father, but I don’t know what the hell it was. We were so off and on that I should have known it would never work. Eventually, I moved to Florida. I don’t know why I did that. Maybe rebellion? But he ended up following me to Florida, we were together for a while and I got pregnant. It was after I got pregnant that I realized that I wasn’t in love with him. We both ended up moving back home to raise Evan. We wanted him to be with his family …”

“Is there a but there?”

“Sometimes … I feel like I gave up what I wanted for Evan. I know it sounds selfish of me and I hate feeling that way, but I never wanted to stay here my entire life.”

“I think when you make a choice to be a parent, you have to sacrifice your own wants,” Carol said gently.

“Yeah and I didn’t want to give him up. The second I found out I was pregnant, I knew that I wanted to keep him even if I didn’t want to be with his father. I don’t regret the decisions that I’ve made, but sometimes … I don’t know, I guess I’ve wanted more for myself.”

“There’s nothing wrong with feeling that way, you know? I think a lot of parents feel that way.”

“Did you?”

“In a way, I guess I did. I didn’t want to move back here, but I felt that it was the best choice for Rindy and my parents.”

“Do you regret it? Making that sacrifice?”

“No. Now that I’ve been back for a couple of months, I’m slowly getting used to it. And now, I have a new friend.” Carol smiled at her and it warmed Therese’s insides.

“That’s always a plus, right?”

“I think so.”

“So, The Point, huh?” Therese asked as she looked around. 

The Point was a place where teenagers would go to make out or have sex. Therese was no stranger to the place and felt odd being there with Carol.

“It’s not what it used to be,” Carol said, laughing. “Teenagers don’t come up here anymore. Not like when I was in school … or you, apparently.”

Therese felt herself blush; she knew the place pretty well. “I’ve been up here a few times,” she said. “Oh my god, you haven’t been up here with my brother, have you?”

Carol laughed raucously. “Oh believe me, he tried. Drove me up here a few times, but nothing happened. I much rather enjoyed bringing the girls up here.” Carol raised her eyebrows.

“Really?”

“Some cheerleaders and a couple of girls on the soccer team.”

“Cheerleaders?” Therese was shocked.

Rindy tried to get Carol’s attention for her mother to watch her and Carol smiled at her daughter. They both kept a close eye on Rindy while they continued to talk.

“Yeah. Why do you think I was a cheerleader? All those girls in short skirts and tight shirts, bouncing around? I couldn’t pass up that opportunity.”

“But you were the quintessential couple: the football star and the cheerleader.”

“What can I say, the women were what I was after. I pretended to like your brother because I didn’t want everyone to know that I was gay.”

“Wow!”

“I know, I always felt bad about leading him on. He was such a nice guy. How is he?”

“He’s good. Lives in Seattle. He’s married and has two kids.”

“Well, I’m glad that I didn’t ruin him.”

“Not at all. He’s doing just fine.”

“And you? Are you doing just fine?”

“I’m okay.” Therese nodded.

“So, if you don’t mind me asking, what do you have planned tonight that you need a babysitter?”

“Oh god.” Therese could feel herself blushing. “I have a date. I haven’t been on a date in ages.”

“Neither have I.” Carol reached over and put her hand on Therese’s. “I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

Something was happening in Therese’s stomach when she felt Carol’s hand on hers. She tried not to let it show.

“Probably just nerves.”

“Probably. Come on, let’s go swim.” 

Carol jumped up and ran to Rindy in the water. Therese watched Carol run away and stared. It just hit her that she was going to see Carol’s wet body. The thought made her tingle and she quickly felt her own body’s response pulsing between her legs. She knew that if she could make it through the rest of the day with Carol, her date was going to be a breeze.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my, a half-naked Carol ... whew!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's difficult for me to wait to post chapters, so here's the next one!

“Wow, that bad, huh?” Carol asked when she answered the door. Therese was standing there after her date looking like it didn’t go so well. But Carol had to admit that Therese looked sexy in the dress that she was wearing. It was a simple black dress, but it hugged her small frame beautifully in all the right places. Therese was petite, but she had delicious curves that Carol was sure she could find herself getting lost in. _Nope, not gonna think about that. She’s a friend. The only friend you have right now. But damn if she doesn’t look wildly sexy._

“Well, it was okay. There was just no chemistry.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Thanks. I’m beginning to think that I’m doomed to never love again.”

“I’m sure you’ll find someone. Probably when you least expect it.”

“I suppose,” Therese said, looking defeated. “Is Evan still awake?”

“No, he and Rindy both fell asleep about an hour ago. He’s welcome to stay.”

“All right. I’ll just come back in the morning and pick him up. Are you sure you don’t mind?”

“Not at all.”

“Thank you. Goodnight, Carol,” Therese said and turned to leave.

“You’re welcome to come in if you like. I have wine. We can talk about your shitty date or anything else you’d like,” Carol said with a wink. She was trying anything to get to know Therese even better. She really did need a friend, even if she was slightly lusting after the woman.

“Really?” Therese asked.

“Yeah, I mean if you want. I haven’t exactly had stimulating conversation tonight. It would be nice to talk to another adult.”

“Okay, let me go home and change and I’ll be right back.”

“I’ll get the wine ready. Red or white?”

“White.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Carol went to the bathroom quickly to check herself in the mirror. She didn’t want to seem like she was trying too hard, but she didn’t want to look like a slob either. _Why the fuck am I in sweats and a t-shirt? I can’t change now. That would be too obvious. Fuck, I’m overthinking this. She’s just a friend, Carol. That’s all._ But since they had gone swimming earlier that day, Carol couldn’t erase Therese from her thoughts. She was sure that she caught the younger woman staring at her quite a few times and she’d be lying to herself if she said that she wasn’t stealing looks also.

She went to the kitchen and picked out the wine. She poured two glasses for them and waited for Therese. As soon as she was finished pouring the wine, she heard a light knock on the door. She smiled and felt a light flutter in her stomach; something she hadn’t felt in a long time.

Therese looked adorable in her yoga pants and oversized hoodie. Carol handed her a glass of wine and Therese took a long drink.

“Wow, that bad?”

“Well, the first sign that it wasn’t going to work was she said that she didn’t drink and didn’t want anyone around her to drink. I don’t know about you, but alcohol has helped the nerves on a first date. So you can imagine how badly I’ve wanted this glass of wine.”

“Oh geez. I’ll go get the bottle. We can sit on the porch if you’d like since it’s so nice outside.”

“That sounds wonderful.”

“I’ll just be a minute.”

“Would you mind if I checked on Evan real quick? I know he’s fine, but I just need to see him.”

“I understand. I put him in the guest room. It’s down the hall, the first door on the left.”

“Thank you.”

Carol went to the front porch and took a huge gulp of her wine. She didn’t want to be feeling this way about a woman again. She was sure that she wasn’t meant to have another relationship. It was too difficult to start over and she felt that she was too old to take that risk again. Even if she did try once more, she was terrified of being left alone again. The pain of losing Jenna left her broken and ripped apart. To Carol, the risk wasn’t worth the reward, at least not at this point in her life. She knew that she should be over the death of her wife, but the pain still felt brand new and she wondered if it would ever go away or at least dull over time.

“You look lost in thought,” Therese said when she sat down next to Carol on the porch swing.

“Oh. Yeah, I was.”

“Care to share?”

Carol shook her head and sighed. “I guess your date just made me think about dating in general. You know, if I’d ever date again, if I’d ever be ready to date again.”

“You don’t date?”

“Ha! No … no, I haven’t dated anyone since Jenna.”

“No one?”

“Nope.”

“Do you mind if I ask why?”

“Well, I just haven’t had any interest in anyone. I’ve been asked out on dates, but I don’t want to date.”

“Why not?”

“Honestly? I’m terrified to fall for someone again. I’m terrified of being left alone again. I was with Jenna for fifteen years and I thought that would last forever. I never dreamed that I’d be a widow at thirty seven. I don’t want to go through that pain again.”

“So, you don’t want to fall in love again?”

“No.” Carol laughed. “God, that sounds so cynical.”

“It’s understandable, though. I mean, I get it. But don’t you ever want to feel that crazy feeling of falling in love with someone? You know, when you can’t stop thinking about her and all you want to do is talk to her all night and all day. That whole stage when you can’t keep your hands off each other. It’s such an amazing feeling, don’t you think?”

“It is, but … I don’t want to take that risk.”

“But what if you find that one person that you could spend the rest of your life with?”

“I did find her and she’s gone.” Carol leaned her head back against the swing.

“Your life isn’t over, Carol. You’re only what … forty?”

“Easy for you to say. You’re only what … thirty two? Is that right?”

“Thirty four.”

“Oh, excuse me,” Carol said dramatically. “I was off by two years. My god, you’re the same age that Jenna was when she died.”

“Wow, thirty four? That’s young. Do you mind if I ask how she died?”

Carol looked at her, surprised by the question. “You don’t know?”

“No.”

“Wow, I thought everyone knew.” Carol cleared her throat. “She jumped from the top of our apartment building. I don’t know how she got up there, but it was fifteen stories. The hospital administrator pulled me into her office in the middle of a busy day. That’s how I knew something was seriously wrong. She told me what happened. I didn’t believe her. She told me to take as much time off as I needed. I was adamant on seeing her body, so she went with me. Until I saw her on that table, I didn’t believe it was real. I think I was in shock for a while and one day, in the middle of standing in line with a friend, waiting for coffee … it hit me, hard. I had a panic attack and my friend Abby took me back home.”

“Carol,” Therese said and placed her hand on Carol’s arm. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say.”

“Thank you, darling. You don’t have to say anything; I know it’s overwhelming.”

“Have you had anyone to talk to about this? A psychiatrist or therapist?”

“Yeah, I have one that I talk to in New York. I started going to him about a month after it happened and since I’ve moved down here, he’s been trying to find someone close to me that I can see.”

“Well, that’s good. Therapy helped me when I was younger.”

“You were in therapy?” Carol was surprised by the admission. Therese didn’t seem like the type to need therapy, but who was she to judge who did and didn’t need therapy.

“Yeah, I still go, but not as much as a used to. Just once a month now. I had a hard time accepting myself and I needed to see a psychiatrist when I was younger.”

“Accepting yourself how?”

“Being attracted to women. Not everyone in my family is accepting of it and I had a hard time with it.”

“What about your parents? Are they okay with it?”

“Oh yeah, they’ve been great. I guess I just had a hard time dealing with pressure from the rest of my family.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that. I’m glad you got help for it, though. I wish Jenna would have sought help for whatever was going on with her.”

“You don’t know why she did it?”

“Nope. No note, no message, no nothing. Just … gone.” Carol shrugged. She mostly hated talking to people about Jenna’s death, but there was something about Therese that she trusted. Therese made her feel at peace; a feeling she hadn’t felt in a long time. She felt that she could talk to her about anything and it was refreshing. Okay, so maybe her mom was right and it was good to have a friend.

“I’m sorry, Carol. If you don’t want to talk about it anymore, we don’t have to.”

“No, it’s okay. I don’t mind. I like talking to you. Thank you.” Carol offered a warm smile. “I think we need more wine.” Carol gestured to the empty bottle.

“I’m sorry, I’ve had too much of your wine.” Therese giggled and it warmed Carol’s insides.

“It’s okay. I have plenty more.”

“Why don’t we move to the couch? I’m sure it’s more comfortable than this swing.”

“You’re probably right. I’ll meet you on the couch after I get the wine.”

Carol set the bottle down on the coffee table after she filled up their glasses. She sat down on the couch and pulled her legs up underneath her.

“So, why don’t you tell me about your shitty date tonight?”

“Ugh, there’s not much to tell. She didn’t want to drink, I did. End of story. If she can’t deal with me drinking ever, then it’ll never work.”

“Could I ask you a personal question?”

“Sure.”

“Do you date both men and women?” Carol was most definitely curious since her mother had told her that she had seen Therese date both men and women.

“Well, I used to date both, but I’ve recently realized that I much rather prefer women. When I think long-term, I’d rather spend the rest of my life with a woman. I finally figured out that I’m more attracted to women. I don’t know what it is about them. They’re kind and soft. Definitely better kissers,” Therese said with a smile.

“You’re not wrong there.”

“Have you been with a lot of men?”

“Nope. All women.”

“You’ve never had sex with a man?” Therese asked incredulously.

“Never.” Carol smiled and shook her head. “No desire to, either.”

“But you dated boys in high school?”

“Only a couple. Even then, I knew nothing would happen with them.”

“You’re not missing anything.”

Therese looked tired and Carol could see that she was getting drunk. They had been through two bottles of wine in a short period of time, but somehow Carol only wanted to stay up all night and talk to her. Therese really was adorable; her smile, her bottom crooked tooth, her dimples, her bright green eyes. Carol could stare at her all night long if given the chance.

“You look tired,” Carol said. “You’re welcome to stay here. Evan’s here, it would be easier for you in the morning.”

“Oh no, I don’t want to put you out like that. My house isn’t that far anyway.” Therese stood up and fell back down on the couch, laughing. “Maybe I _should_ stay.”

“You can sleep in my bed and I’ll sleep out here.”

“Oh no, I’m not going to kick you out of your own bed. I can sleep out here.”

“Really, I don’t mind. I have a hard time sleeping in beds anymore anyway. Being alone and all that. I tend to pass out on the couch anyway. Come on, I’ll help you to my bedroom.”

Carol stood up and pulled Therese off the couch. She wrapped her arm around Therese’s waist and Therese wrapped her arm around Carol’s shoulders. When Therese laid her head on Carol’s shoulder, it felt good, _too_ good. That was a feeling she didn’t want to get used to. She laid Therese on the bed and covered her up. Therese could barely keep her eyes open. _Fuck, this woman just might kill me._

“Thank you, Carol.”

“You’re welcome, sweetheart.” Carol leaned down and kissed Therese’s forehead and the gesture felt natural to her. It could’ve been that Carol was just a better caretaker in the last few years, but it felt natural. “Goodnight, Therese.”

“Goodnight, Carol.”

Carol chastised herself for the kiss. She knew that she’d be overthinking that small kiss all night long and feared that she may not be able to sleep. This was something that she was going to have to discuss with Dr. Harrison the next time that he called.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, are you still enjoying the story?


	4. Chapter 4

When Therese opened her eyes the next morning, she could feel an instant headache. She knew the alcohol was the reason for it. _Why the fuck did I drink so much?_ She looked around, unfamiliar with her surroundings. Then she remembered what happened the night before: she drank too much alcohol and now she was in Carol’s bed, sans Carol. _Did we sleep together? Oh that’s right, she carried me to her bed. Too bad she didn’t stay …_ She smiled when she remembered that Carol kissed her forehead.

Therese sat up on the side of the bed and looked around. Carol had a nice bedroom; everything in its own place. The bed was pretty big and comfortable, too. Everything smelled like Carol. Therese picked up one of the pillows and inhaled. There was a faint smell of Carol and it made her smile. She didn’t want to feel this way, but she couldn’t help herself when she found out that Carol was back in town. Her crush came back full force; she was beyond smitten with her, but she was going to try to keep it to herself. Carol seemed to need a friend right now and that’s what she was going to be to her.

When she stood up, her head started to pound. She rubbed her temples and headed for the kitchen, but there were stairs that she was going to have to maneuver on her way. _Seriously, why did I drink so fucking much?_ She heard the cartoons on the television and assumed that Evan and Rindy were watching. When she rounded the corner to the kitchen, she collided with Carol and almost fell. But Carol was quick to catch her before she hit the ground. 

“Hey there. You okay?” Carol asked, still holding her.

Between the hangover and Carol holding her, she felt lightheaded. She squinted in pain from her headache. “A little hungover is all. I’ll be all right.”

“A little? Sweetheart, I’d say you’re full blown hungover,” Carol said with a laugh. “Come on, I’ll get you some coffee.” Carol helped her to a chair in the kitchen and handed her a cup of coffee. “Drink up, the caffeine will help.”

“Oh my god, how much did I drink?”

“Well, we cleared two bottles, but I think you did most of that on your own.”

“Shit,” Therese muttered. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it. It happens.”

“Yeah, but I hate hangovers.”

“I don’t think anyone _likes_ hangovers.”

“True.” Therese took a sip of the coffee. “Did Evan eat anything?”

“Yeah, I made breakfast. I saved a plate for you if you’re hungry.”

“Yes, I’m starving. Must be the alcohol.”

Carol heated up the plate in the microwave while Therese poured some more coffee for herself. She felt awkward after the conversation that they’d had the night before, unsure of what to say.

“Did you sleep okay?” Carol asked.

“I did. Your bed is really comfortable and huge.”

Carol smiled. “Sometimes Rindy and I sleep in it together. I’ve been sleeping in it more and more, but it was hard to sleep in it at first.”

“I’m sorry if I was over the line, asking you such personal questions last night.”

“Don’t worry about it. I don’t mind telling you about me. I like talking to you.”

Carol handed Therese a plate and went to check on the kids. It felt good to wake up in Carol’s house, almost normal. It was a feeling that Therese didn’t want to get used to. Surely Carol would never see Therese as anything more than a friend. Carol was way out of her league, for sure, but Therese would settle for friendship and her own thoughts of Carol when she was alone.

“I hope it’s okay,” Carol said as she sat across the table from Therese. “I made it a while ago, but I didn’t think you’d sleep that long.”

“It’s delicious. You should’ve woken me up.”

“No way, you definitely needed some sleep.”

“Thank you.”

“I really am sorry that your date went so badly. For what it’s worth, it’s her loss.”

“Thanks.” Therese smiled at the words. How did she have the ability to make her feel so good about a shitty date? “I might take a page from the Carol book and quit dating.”

“Don’t let one bad date ruin dating for you. There are plenty more women out there for you.”

“I’m tired of looking, though. I don’t understand why it has to be so hard. I miss having someone. I get lonely,” Therese said softly.

“When was your last relationship?”

“Couple years ago. We were together for three years.”

“What happened?”

“I don’t know, it just didn’t work after a while. I don’t blame her for leaving. We weren’t compatible. But I miss having someone to come home to, wake up with, talk to. I miss the intimacy. Not just sex, but you know, the small things. Holding hands, cuddling, taking naps with her. I would lay my head in her lap and she’d instantly play with my hair. I miss that.” Therese realized that she was rambling and looked up at Carol. “I’m sorry. I sound pathetic, don’t I?”

“Not at all. I think it’s human nature to want those things and miss them when you don’t have them.”

“Do you? Miss all of that?”

Carol turned her head to look out the window and Therese felt awful for asking that question. Of course Carol missed all of that; she had it once. Anyone would miss that after it was taken away.

“I do miss it. It’s probably what I miss most. Jenna had an uncanny way of knowing how and when to touch me.” Carol turned to Therese and smiled. “It was soothing.”

“I didn’t mean to bring up anything painful for you.”

“No, it’s fine. It’s good to talk about it, actually.”

“You know that you can talk to me about anything you want, right?”

“I do.” Carol smiled. “You might regret that one day,” she said, laughing.

“I doubt it.” Therese finished eating and drank the rest of her coffee. “I should probably get Evan home. I don’t want to bother you.”

“You’re not a bother,” Carol interrupted. “Really.”

“Yeah, but I haven’t even paid you for babysitting and I drank your wine and passed out in your bed …”

“Therese, stop. We’re friends. It’s no big deal.”

“Still, I can’t imagine what you think of me after getting drunk like that last night.”

“I think that you’re human. Besides that, friends look out for each other. Hopefully, you can do the same for me sometime.”

“Babysit Rindy and help you get wasted after a shitty date?” Therese smirked.

“Okay, maybe not the date part. But just be there when _I_ need a friend.”

“Absolutely.”

“I don’t know if you have anything planned for today, but since my dad has been feeling better, he’s been dying to use his grill again. You and Evan are welcome to come over if you’d like. I mean, if you’re feeling up to it.”

Was Carol nervous? She seemed nervous and adorable for it. Therese smiled at her. Of course she was going to be there. She wasn’t going to miss an opportunity to spend more time with Carol.

“We’ll be there.”

“Good.”

“I should probably go home and shower. I smell like a brewery.”

“All right, well I’ll see you later then.”

“Should I bring something?”

“No, I’m in charge of everything. Just bring yourself and Evan.”

* * *

“So, Therese is coming, huh?” Gloria asked her daughter.

“Yes. She and Evan will be over.”

“Ah, I see.”

“What do you see, Mom?” Carol smirked.

“Nothing. Just that I know that she spent the night last night.”

“Nothing gets past you, does it?”

“Nope.”

“Well, I _was_ babysitting Evan.”

“And?”

“And she stopped by to pick him up, but he was asleep.”

“So you suggested she spend the night?”

“Only after she had too much to drink.”

“Oh okay,” Gloria said. “I’m not surprised that an attractive woman spent the night at your house.”

“And slept in my bed,” Carol muttered.

“What was that? She slept in your bed?”

“Why did you ask if you knew what I said?” Carol laughed and nudged her mother’s arm. “I didn’t sleep with her, in case you’re wondering.”

“It’s none of my business, sweetheart, but why don’t you just ask her out?”

“Mom! I barely know her. And before you say anything, I wasn’t going to let her go home in the condition that she was in last night.”

“Carol, let me ask you something.”

“Okay?”

“Why don’t you just give it a chance?”

“I already told you why.” Carol sat down at the kitchen table and looked out onto the patio outside. Rindy was busy helping Grandpa Bruce with the grill. She clearly was irritated that he wouldn’t let her get too close. _She’s so determined._ Carol smiled as she took in the scene.

“She’s so much like you when you were that age,” Gloria said. “So relentless.”

“She’s a handful all right.”

“I don’t want to push you, Carol …”

“So don’t, Mom.”

“I only want to see my daughter happy. I haven’t seen that light in your eyes since you came home, but … I saw it when you were talking about Therese. There’s a spark in your eye when you talk about her. I’m curious to see how bright it gets when she gets here.”

“Fine. I like her, but I’m still getting to know her. I don’t want to ruin what could be a great friendship if she doesn’t feel the same way.”

“I saw the way that she looked at you yesterday morning. If I had to guess, she’s had a crush on you for a long time.”

They were interrupted by the doorbell and Gloria said that she’d get it. Carol sat there wondering how her mother seemed to always know what she was thinking. She really enjoyed spending time with Therese and had a hard time sleeping last night while she knew that the younger woman was asleep in her bed.

“Hey, stranger,” Therese said when she entered the kitchen. Before Carol had a chance to get up, two arms were wrapped around her neck from behind. Carol smiled and put her hands on Therese’s forearms.

“Hey yourself.”

Therese stood up and Carol turned around. If Therese was still nursing a hangover, it was difficult to tell. She looked radiant in her flowing light blue dress.

“You look really good. No sign of a hangover,” Carol said.

“Well, I feel much better. I think you helped with that.”

“Hey Evan,” Carol said when the boy ran into the kitchen.

“Hey Carol. Can I go help Bruce?” the little boy asked, his eyes wide with excitement.

“You can try, but I don’t know how close he’ll let you get to the grill.”

“Okay!” Evan ran outside and tried to help. Both Carol and Therese laughed watching him.

“I was going to bring something, but I didn’t get to the store,” Therese said as she sat down at the table.

“I told you that you didn’t have to bring anything. You and Evan are enough,” she said softly. “You look really pretty, by the way.”

“Oh. Thank you.” The blush that crept up on Therese’s cheeks was adorable.

“Hey you two,” Gloria said.

Carol turned around and saw her mom leaning in the doorway, giving Carol a knowing smile.

“Hey, Mom.” 

“I’m just going to go see if your father needs anything,” Gloria said and walked outside.

“Should we go out there?” Therese asked.

“Nah, he’s almost finished.” Carol turned to Therese, thankful to have a minute alone with her. “Are you feeling any better?”

“I am. A lot better. I showered and was able to get a nap in while Evan was watching a movie.”

“That’s good. Sleep is a pretty good cure for a hangover.”

“I agree. So, I was thinking that for being so helpful for me last night, I could … fix you dinner some night. If you want?” Oh, Therese was definitely blushing now and Carol wanted to know the right things to say and do to make that happen more often. It was _way_ too adorable.

“Only if you want to. I don’t want you to feel like you owe me for anything.”

“I don’t mind, really.”

“Okay. I’d like that.”

“Me too.”

Carol looked through the sliding glass door and saw her mother. Gloria opened the door and stuck her head in, smiling at Carol.

“Full blown fire, by the way,” Gloria said with a wink and shut the door. Carol rolled her eyes and shook her head.

“Something wrong?” Therese asked.

“No. Everything’s fine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmm, Therese fixing Carol dinner ... is there possibly a date in the future for these two?


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't stop myself from posting, especially since I've had such an excellent response to this story so far. Enjoy, ladies!

It seemed to be one of the longest weeks that Carol had had in a long while. Maybe it was the fact that she was nervous about having dinner with Therese. Good thing she had four days of work to keep her busy, but when she wasn’t, her mind wandered to Therese. She tried to keep the texting to a minimum, but every time she turned around, there was a new text from her. She chalked it up to the fact that there was a six year difference between them. Whatever the reason, she couldn’t deny the fact she was happy to receive them. Carol had never been one to text, but she was finding herself texting more and more.

Before she had gone back to work for four days, she called her therapist to talk about her feelings for Therese. He said that he was happy to hear that she was starting to have feelings for someone again and not to overthink it too much – which was impossible. She decided that she was just going to go along with whatever she felt. The truth was that it felt good to feel this way about a woman again. To get excited and nervous just seeing her, thinking about her or even texting her. She hoped that Therese felt the same way.

Carol was on her fourth day and when she went to her office for a break, she decided to call her mom and check in.

“Hey, baby. Everything okay?”

“Yeah. Just checking in. Rindy and Dad all right?”

“Yep. They’re wearing out each other.”

“What about you? You okay?”

“I’m fine, darling. Are _you_ okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You sure? You don’t sound fine.”

“I’m just nervous about dinner with Therese, that’s all.”

“Everything will be fine, baby. She’s crazy about you. I could see it the other day. And you’re clearly wild about her.”

“Oh my god, am I _that_ obvious?”

“A little, but so is she. Are you still scared? About falling for her?”

“Kind of, but I’m not going to deny my feelings anymore.” Carol looked down at her office phone. “Shit Mom, I gotta go. I’ll talk to you later about it. I still need your advice.”

“I’ll be here, darling. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Carol was thankful that the rest of the day was easy. She showered, changed and went home. It felt good to have some more time off work. She could definitely get used to that feeling. She pulled up in her driveway and decided to walk to her parents’ house. On the way, she got a text. She smiled when she saw it was from Therese.

> Glad to see you made it home in one piece, Dr. Aird. -T
> 
> I see I have a stalker now … or are you writing a book on me? ;-) -C
> 
> Would either be so bad? -T
> 
> Probably! LOL! What are you still doing up, anyway? -C
> 
> Making sure the good doctor gets home safely. Oh, and writing. -T
> 
> I’m home now, so you can go to bed. :-) -C
> 
> Well, you’re not exactly home yet. From what I can see, you’re walking down the street … -T
> 
> Go to bed, stalker! -C
> 
> Goodnight -T
> 
> Goodnight -C

Carol felt giddy knowing that Therese had waited up for her. They hadn’t seen each other in days and now that she had a little time off, Carol intended to change that. 

“What do you look so happy about?” Gloria asked when Carol walked through the door. “Oh, never mind. I’m sure it has something to do with Therese.”

“Of course. Is Rindy asleep?”

“Yes, I told you to just get her in the morning.”

“I know, but I still needed to come talk to you about Therese.”

“I like that you’re accepting what’s happening between the two of you.”

“Me too. I haven’t felt this way in a long time. It kind of scares me.”

“Why?”

They went into the kitchen and Gloria poured them some coffee. The caffeine never seemed to bother Carol whether it was the middle of night or the middle of the day. Occupational hazard of being a doctor.

“Well if I’m being honest … I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way. Not even about Jenna,” Carol said and could feel tears pricking her eyes. “Does that mean that I didn’t love her?”

“Oh sweetie, it doesn’t mean that at all.”

“Then why does it feel that way?”

“We love people differently. When you fell in love with Jenna, I’m sure you never felt that way before in your life, right?”

“Yeah.”

“So, Therese is a different person. You’re not going to love her the way that you loved Jenna. It feels different because you’re older now, you’re wiser. You know how fast it can all be taken away. Not just because of Jenna, but because you’re a doctor and you see it every day.”

Carol sighed, understanding what her mother was talking about. It made sense, but her feelings for Therese still made her feel that she didn’t love her wife as much.

“Darling, it doesn’t mean that you didn’t love her. I know that you loved her,” Gloria said and took Carol’s hand. “I saw the way the two of you looked at each other. You can’t deny that was true love. She was crazy about you and it was obvious how in love you were with her. Don’t question it, darling. Love is love no matter how you look at it.”

“How are you so wise about this?”

“I’ve been through it,” she said simply.

“What? Before Dad?”

“Yeah. We were together for a few years. We had our lives planned out and then he got called to war. Unfortunately, he never came back.”

“Mom, I’m so sorry.”

“I’m sorry that he passed, but I’m not sorry about the time I had with him. I wouldn’t be with your father and I wouldn’t have you. I loved him in a different way, but I still loved him. I don’t question that anymore. I did at one point, but not anymore. And that doesn’t mean that I loved him more or less than your father. I just loved him differently.”

“You never told me this.”

“It’s hard to believe that your parents had lives before you, huh?” Gloria laughed.

“I suppose.”

“Don’t overthink it, baby. It’ll drive you crazy if you do. Look at it this way, Jenna would want you to be happy. She wouldn’t want you to mope around, scared to fall in love again.”

“You’re right.”

“If only you could just assume that every time we start a conversation, you’d save us a lot of time.”

Carol couldn’t help but laugh. She was right, always right. “Okay, Mom. I think I’ll do that from now on.”

“Just give her a chance, Carol. Give yourself a chance to love again.”

“Okay, okay. I will.” Carol stood up and washed her cup. “I’m going to head home. I’ll come back in the morning.”

“You’re welcome to stay if you want.”

“That’s all right. I need to change anyway. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Goodnight, baby. I love you.”

“Love you, too,” Carol said and shut the door behind her.

Her mother was most definitely right; she needed to give herself a chance to fall in love. Everything she said about falling in love and the way that we loved people differently rang true. She thought about that on the short walk home. She chuckled when she felt her phone buzz in her pocket, knowing it had to be Therese.

> Glad to see you made it back home. :-) -T
> 
> Glad to see I still have a stalker … -C
> 
> Who? Me? -T
> 
> Am I going to have to come tuck you in myself in order for you to go to bed? -C
> 
> Just making sure you made it home safe. -T
> 
> Thanks! -C
> 
> Goodnight, Dr. Aird. -T
> 
> Goodnight, Miss Belivet. -C

* * *

Therese woke up later than normal the next morning. She attributed it to the fact that she’d stayed up later than usual to watch for Carol to get home. It was a habit that she was getting used to and didn’t mind. She had let Evan stay up later than usual since it was summer and she didn’t have to worry about getting him to school. He was actually the reason that she was awake or else she would have slept longer. She got out of bed and made him breakfast. His father was due to pick him up in a couple of hours. 

Therese was missing Carol terribly. The last time they spent any real time together was at Carol’s parents’ house and that seemed like months ago. Sure, she saw her coming home from work, but it wasn’t the same. Neither was texting, but she had to do what she could. She thought for sure that she would annoy her with her texting, but Carol always replied when she could. 

She wondered if she should wait a while to text or just show up at Carol’s door. The last thing she wanted to do was wake her since she had worked the previous four days, but the waiting was brutal. After Evan’s father picked him up for the week, Therese decided to do some more writing to keep her mind busy. Writing made her feel at ease most of the time. Therese wrote about everything, but what she hadn’t told anyone was that she was writing a cheesy romance novel in between writing columns for the paper.

Therese had been deep into writing when she heard a knock on the door. When she looked at the time, it was well after two. She stood up from her computer and stretched. She quickly checked her phone and didn’t see any message from Carol. 

When she opened the door, there she was, standing in all her beautiful glory. _Carol._ She threw her arms around her and held on tight. She didn’t care if she seemed desperate, it felt good to hold Carol. It only hit her after a minute that they never held each other like this, but Carol didn’t let go. Carol pulled her even closer. When reality hit Therese, she slowly pulled herself away.

“I’m sorry,” Therese said, feeling ridiculously embarrassed and felt her face get hot. “I’m not sure where that came from.”

“It’s okay,” Carol said softly. “I missed you.”

“You did?”

“I did.” Carol nodded. “Could we talk?”

“Come in.”

Carol looked around and Therese realized that Carol had never seen her home.

“Would you like something to drink?”

“Some water.”

Therese led the way into the kitchen.

“Your house is nice.”

“Thanks.” Therese felt awkward after that hug and hoped that she didn’t ruin everything. “What do you want to talk about?”

“Well,” Carol said. She opened the bottle of water and sat down. “This isn’t easy for me, so I’m just going to say it … I like you. I want to get to know you more. I haven’t felt like this in a really long time. It terrifies me. But if you’d like to … I don’t know, see if there’s something between us …” Carol took a drink of water. She was nervous and Therese wasn’t going to let her keep going. She kneeled down beside her and held onto her hands.

“Yes, Carol. Yes to everything you just said.”

“Really?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Oh, thank god.” Carol sighed. “I was so nervous. I haven’t done this in a really long time.”

“Did you really think that I’d say no? After all that texting this last week? After making sure you got home safe every night?”

“I guess not, but actually asking you to date me is a different story.”

“Well technically, you didn’t make it that far. I interrupted you,” Therese said, smiling.

“You’re right, I didn’t.”

“So, ask me.” Therese shrugged.

“Would you like to date me?”

“Yes, I would.” Therese smiled. “See, not so hard, huh?”

“Easy for you to say. I haven’t done that in twenty years.”

“So, then our dinner tomorrow night? That’ll be our first date?”

“I suppose it will be.”

“Sounds good to me.”

“I need to ask you to be patient with me. I know it’s a lot to ask.”

“I can do that.”

“Are you sure? I’m not going to be able to just jump in bed with you and have sex right away. Are you okay with that?”

“I wouldn’t expect you to anyway. But you’re thinking about it, huh?” Therese smirked and Carol blushed. “As long as you’re thinking that far ahead.”

“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t, but I will need some patience from you when it comes to that.”

“It’s not a problem. I’ll gladly wait for you.”

“Thank you.”

Today had without a doubt been one of the best days in Therese’s life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, most certainly a date!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have a date, ladies!!!

Carol grabbed a bottle of wine and took one last look in the mirror at herself. Therese said not to dress up since she felt that it would put way too much pressure on the night. It was their first date and Carol was trying to keep her nerves in check. Not only was it her first date with Therese, but it was Carol’s first _first_ date in nearly twenty years. Carol looked closely into the mirror. Was her lipstick too dark? Were her wrinkles too obvious? Was she wearing too much makeup? Not enough makeup? There she was, overthinking again. She tried to dress casual - capris, short sleeve button up shirt, sandals. Her makeup was subtle, save for the deep red lipstick.

“Come on, Rindy!” she called out for her daughter.

“Coming!”

“Don’t forget your bag.”

“Do I have to, Mom? I want to stay at home tonight.”

“Grandma’s going to watch you. I don’t know when I’ll be home, darling.”

“Fine,” Rindy huffed.

“Attitude,” Carol warned.

Rindy grabbed her bag and stood on the porch, waiting for her mother. Carol turned on the porch light and locked the door behind them. They headed down the street to her parents' house.

“Why can’t I stay home, Mom?” Rindy whined.

“I told you, sweetheart. I have a date.”

“With Therese.”

“Yes.”

“Why can’t I be there?”

“Because it’s a date, darling. You don’t bring children on dates.”

“So, is it like when boys and girls date?”

“Girls can date girls and boys can date boys. We talked about this,” Carol tried to explain to her daughter.

“Right. And I had another mommy.”

“Yes, sweetheart.”

“But she died.”

“Yes.”

“I don’t remember her, Mom.”

“I know, darling. You were too little.”

“How did she hurt herself?”

“That’s a story for when you’re older, okay?”

“Do you miss her?”

Rindy was on a roll this evening. This was a conversation she didn’t want to have with her six year old daughter, let alone right before her first date with Therese. 

“Of course I miss her, baby.”

“Do you like Therese?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Do you love her?”

“Sweetheart, I’m not there yet, but I like spending time with her. Do you like her?”

“Yeah. She’s really pretty.”

“She is, isn’t she?” Carol smiled. “But not as pretty as my little girl. Come on, let’s get you inside so you can terrorize your grandparents,” Carol said and opened the door to her parents' house.

“Well hello there,” Gloria said.

“Hey, Mom.”

“You look good,” she said, smiling.

“You think so? Do I look too casual? Or not enough? What about my makeup?”

“Carol, don’t …”

“Overthink it. I know.” Carol sighed. “Mom, I’m so nervous.”

“I know, darling. It’s going to be fine,” she said and held onto her arms. “Take a deep breath. Just enjoy tonight, okay?”

“I will.”

“Have fun, sweetheart. It’s just a date.”

“Then why does it feel like so much more?”

“Because you’re putting too much pressure on it.”

“You’re right.”

“Go,” Gloria pushed her out the door. “Don’t keep her waiting.”

Carol smiled and focused on her breathing while she walked the short distance to Therese’s house. Her hands were slightly shaky and her heart was pounding the inside of her chest. Before she had a chance to ring the doorbell of Therese’s house, the door opened. She smiled when she saw Therese standing there, looking gorgeous as usual. She was wearing a bright yellow flowing dress. Carol wasn’t sure how many flowing dresses Therese owned, but she hoped that she had a closet full of them because she looked beautiful in them.

“You’re absolutely stunning,” Carol said and kissed her cheek.

“Thank you,” Therese said, looking adorably shy. “You’re gorgeous.”

“I brought wine,” Carol said and held up the bottle.

“Haven’t I already had enough of your wine?” Therese laughed and stepped aside. “Come in.” She took the bottle from Carol and they went to the kitchen. “Did you find your way here all right?” She smirked.

“Oh, you have jokes, huh?” Carol watched as Therese poured wine for them. 

“Maybe a few.”

“I don’t know what you’ve cooked, but it smells delicious.”

“Some pasta.” Therese handed Carol a glass of wine. “And I may have overdone it a little.”

“What the pasta?”

“No, not that. I cooked lobster for us. Well, not whole lobsters, just the tails.”

“Oh yeah? Wow, I didn’t know that I was dating a chef.”

“Hardly the case. Do you cook?”

“Not well.” Carol laughed. “Rindy likes eating at my parents' house because my mother is a pretty good cook. Me? Not so much. The doctor life doesn’t afford much time for cooking and this is the first time in my life that I’ve slowed down enough to have some time for cooking. Jenna did most of the cooking.”

“Well, I could teach you sometime. If you’d like.”

“You know what I’d really like to do with the extra time that I’ll have?”

“What’s that?”

“Start a garden.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. I was never able to have one when I lived in New York.”

“Well, you’re in luck. I have one.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, I do. I can help you with that. Although, you probably should have started earlier in the year. It’s a little late to plant seeds now. But there are a few things that can be planted and in the meantime, we can work on the cooking.”

“Sounds good to me. Do you need any help with the dinner?”

“Nope, everything’s done.”

Carol sipped her wine and enjoyed the feeling of the alcohol seeping into her veins. She was counting on the alcohol to calm her nerves and it was helping. Carol couldn’t keep her eyes off Therese – she was gorgeous. Her dark brown hair fell just above her shoulders in loose waves.

“For the sake of calming nerves, could I ask you to do something?” Carol asked.

“What is it?”

“Could I kiss you? It doesn’t have to be anything dramatic or drawn out. Just a small …”

Therese interrupted her before she was able to finish. Her soft lips moulded perfectly to Carol’s and then she pulled away.

“Something like that?” Therese asked.

“Yeah,” Carol said with a nod and a deep breath. “Something like that.”

“You really _are_ nervous, aren’t you?” Therese reached for Carol’s arm and gave a light squeeze.

“I am.” Carol swallowed hard and took a gulp of her wine. “I’m out of practice. I think the nerves come from putting the date tag on tonight.”

“Just think of it this way: we’re friends still getting to know each other and that’s what dating is anyway. So, if you want to get technical and if it will help calm you down, the other night when I got drunk and you took care of me was our first date.”

“That doesn’t count.”

“Why not? We were learning about each other _and_ when it wasn’t considered a date, you weren’t nervous.”

“That was different. Now there are expectations.”

“I have no expectations. I only want to get to know you. Don’t you want the same thing?”

“I do.”

“Well, that’s all I want.”

“Okay.” Carol smiled. “You’re right. I’m sorry for overthinking everything. I always do. Must be the doctor brain in me.”

“Well then, I like it.”

“My overthinking?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Because if you’re overthinking this …” Therese motioned between herself and Carol. “Then in some way, it means you care.”

“I do.” Carol smiled.

“Good. Now let’s eat.”

After another glass of wine, Carol finally felt calm. Therese was easy to talk to and the conversation over dinner was nothing short of fascinating. Carol learned more about Therese’s writing and that she wrote a lot for the local paper. She was still technically freelance and wrote pieces for different magazines, some that Carol had heard of and it impressed her. 

After dinner, Carol realized how much pressure that she previously had put on the date because now it felt completely natural to be with Therese. The conversation kept going until she noticed how late it was.

“Damn, is it already eleven?” Carol asked when she looked at her phone.

“I guess it is.”

“I should probably go, even though I’m pretty sure that I could stay here and talk to you all night long.” Carol stood up and took her glass to the kitchen.

“You can just set it down. I’ll get it.”

“I can help you clean up. I don’t mind.”

“Nonsense.” Therese waved her hand. “I’ll get it. Besides, I’m the one that asked you over.”

Carol bit her bottom lip and smiled. “I had a really good time tonight.”

“Me too.”

“I hope we can do it again. Only next time, it’s on me.”

“So, I get another date?” Therese sheepishly asked.

“Absolutely. Only I’ll take you out since I can’t cook to save my life.”

“I don’t care what we do, as long as I’m with you. You don’t need to impress me, Carol. I’m already impressed with the fact that you actually want to date me.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes.” Therese was blushing furiously.

“Why are you blushing so adorably?”

“Oh god. Do I have to tell you?”

“Not if you don’t want to. Actually, if it keeps you blushing the way that you are right now, I’d rather you not because it’s so damn cute when you blush.”

“Well in that case, I’ll definitely tell you because I hate how easily I blush.” Therese diverted her eyes from Carol. “When my brother first brought you to the house all those years ago, I thought you were so beautiful and I was instantly smitten. I didn’t realize that I was gay at the time, but I knew that I was crazy about my brother’s girlfriend and I couldn’t wait until the next time you came by the house.”

“You had a crush on me?”

“I did … still do,” she said softly.

Carol leaned over and whispered in her ear. “Well then you’re in luck because I have a crush on you as well.” She brought her hand up to caress Therese’s neck and kissed her softly on the cheek. “Goodnight, Therese.”

“Goodnight, Carol.”

Carol walked the short distance to her parents' house, giddy from her date. She couldn’t wait to get to know Therese even more. There was a connection with her that neither one could deny and Carol was beginning to feel thankful that Therese came along at the right time. Moving back home was proving to be one of the best decisions that Carol had made in a long time and Therese was one of the reasons for it. She was more than eager to see where it would go with Therese.

The lights were still on at the house and she was sure that her mother was still awake so that she could get all the details. She unlocked the front door and tried to be as quiet as possible.

“You know I’m still awake, I don’t know why you’re trying to be so quiet,” Gloria said from the living room.

“Hi, Mom. I figured you’d still be awake.”

“So? When’s the wedding?”

“Slow down. We’re not there yet,” Carol said and sat down on the couch next to her mother.

“But are you heading in that direction?”

“It was one date and there are no wedding bells yet.”

“Damn. I’m really looking forward to her being my daughter-in-law.”

“You’re relentless,” Carol said, laughing.

“Seriously, how did it go?”

“It was really good.”

“Just really good?”

“Incredible, actually. I really like her, Mom. She’s amazing.”

“Oh, I already know that she is. I’ve been waiting for you two to get to know each other.”

“Well, there’s going to be a second date. So that’s good, right?”

“Of course it is, baby.”

“The next one’s on me. I don’t have a clue as to what I should do, where to take her, what to eat.”

“Take her to dinner.”

“Too … boring. I need to do something else. She said she doesn’t need to be impressed, but just dinner sounds so lame.”

“Take her to the lake house.”

“For a date?”

“What’s wrong with that? It’s simple. You like to be outdoors. The two of you can swim, use the grill, use the hot tub. Maybe spend the night?” Gloria shrugged.

“I don’t give it up as easily as I used to, Mom. Besides, this one’s different.” Carol thought about Therese and how important she was slowly becoming to her. “This one’s special.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, did you enjoy the date? I hope so!
> 
> ;-)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very happy birthday to the one and only Cate Blanchett! If you have yet to see any of the pics of her in Cannes, you may need an inhaler!
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

The next morning, Therese was still reeling from her date with Carol. She couldn’t get over the fact that her preteen crush on teenaged Carolyn Ross had now been reciprocated by the woman that was Carol Aird.

Their date went really well and Therese started to hope that she could get over her insecurities about her body. She knew that she was jumping the gun, but was feeling that this could blossom into an actual relationship. Usually, she didn’t have problems with showing a partner her body. But this wasn’t just anyone; this was _Carol_. This woman already meant more to her than anyone she had ever been with and she didn’t want to do anything to mess it up.

Therese was in the kitchen drinking her coffee when she heard her phone buzz. She smiled, hopeful that it was the woman who was currently occupying her thoughts.

> Good morning, beautiful. Hope you slept well. -C  
> 
> 
> Sleeping was slightly difficult. I couldn’t seem to get you out of my mind. -T  
> 
> 
> Funny because I couldn’t get you out of mine, either. -C

_Oh my god!_ Therese felt like a giddy teenager when it came to Carol and she hadn’t felt butterflies in her stomach this way since she first fell for Carol all those years ago. She was in the middle of texting her back when her doorbell rang. When she opened the door, it was Carol. 

“What are you doing texting me if you’re standing outside my door?” she asked, laughing.

Carol shrugged. “Just wanted to make sure you were awake before I rang the bell.”

How did she look so good so early in the morning? How did she do it? Therese found herself wondering what it would be like to see Carol in the morning after sleeping with her all night. 

“Well, I’m awake. Do you want some coffee?”

“I’d love some,” Carol said and leaned in to kiss Therese on the cheek. 

She wondered how it was possible that someone could make her go from hopelessly tired to wide awake in seconds with a single kiss. Her body was on fire, aching for any contact with Carol. Her body hadn’t felt this way in a long time and she was sure that she’d never ached to be touched by anyone the way she ached for Carol.

“So, what brings you over here this early in the morning?” Therese asked when they went to the kitchen.

“Well …” Carol took a sip of her coffee. “I was wondering if you’re not busy with writing today if you’d like to accompany Rindy and me to my parent’s lake house. We’re just going up for the day to relax, swim and eat. I thought maybe you’d like to come.”

“Could I bring alcohol?”

“It’s a requirement.” Carol laughed. “I always take extra clothes in case I drink too much to drive back. So I’d come prepared if I were you.”

“I didn’t know your parents have a lake house.”

“Oh yeah, they’ve had it for years. Rindy and I have spent a few days up there since I’ve been back home.”

“I’d love to go.”

“Can you be ready in an hour?”

“Absolutely.”

* * *

An hour later, they were on the road. Therese enjoyed the scenery on the way. It was the beginning of summer and everything was lush and green. The flowers had bloomed and she caught the light scent of honeysuckle. She enjoyed the banter between mother and daughter and it made her miss Evan. As if Carol sensed something was wrong, she reached over and put her hand on Therese’s thigh. She jumped and quickly pushed Carol’s hand away, but panicked when she saw the look of terror on her face.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to …”

“No, it’s fine,” Therese quickly interrupted. “Just startled me, that’s all.”

“Are you all right?”

“Yeah, just missing Evan. I know he’d love to be here if he knew where I was.”

“We can bring him sometime, if you’d like?”

“Yeah, I think he’d like that.” 

Therese smiled, trying to ease Carol, but knew that probably wasn’t the case. She pushed her hand away so fast that she worried that Carol would never try to touch her again. The atmosphere had shifted and she sensed Carol’s demeanor change; she knew it was her fault. _Fuck!_ It was an involuntary action and it wasn’t that she didn’t want Carol to touch her – quite the opposite, actually. But she wasn’t ready for Carol to touch her in the one spot that she hated most on her body.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push you away like that,” Therese said, trying to ease the tension.

“It’s okay. I was probably over the line. I’m the one who should be apologizing.”

“Let’s both stop apologizing and call it even, okay?”

“Okay.”

* * *

When they got to the lake house, Carol got their bags out of the back and Therese helped Rindy out of the backseat. Carol watched as Therese wandered around the house in awe.

“This place is incredible!”

“I know. I love it up here.”

She watched Therese take off her shirt and put it in her bag. She had a bikini top on underneath and Carol tried not to stare. Her board shorts were cute, but Carol was dying to see those legs and was sure the shorts were what she’d be wearing to swim. Carol set their bags on the couch and put the food in the refrigerator. She then helped Rindy change.

“Hurry up, Mom! I want to swim.”

“Calm down, we have all day.”

“Therese, are you going to swim with me?” Rindy asked.

“Yeah, I’ll swim with you in a little bit.”

“Yay!”

Carol laughed and grabbed the sunscreen to make sure Rindy’s fair complexion didn’t burn. She secured the life vest to her daughter and went outside to watch Rindy. Carol wore her bikini under her clothes and took off her shirt and shorts. She watched as Rindy ran straight for the water and laughed as she splashed around. She heard the sliding glass door open and felt Therese standing beside her.

“She really loves to swim, doesn’t she?”

“She’s like a fish. She’s always been that way and that child is not afraid of anything. Which, of course, terrifies me.” 

She finally looked over at Therese and smiled. Therese handed her a towel and the sunscreen.

“Thank you.”

“Would you mind getting my back?” Therese asked softly.

“Not at all.” 

This was certainly a turn of events from earlier in the car. Carol had been scared of touching Therese after she shoved her hand away. It was a simple gesture that Carol didn’t think twice about. She hadn’t meant to overstep her boundaries, but now she was straddling the lounge chair with Therese between her legs and praying that her hands weren’t shaking too much. She massaged the lotion into Therese’s back and her skin was soft … _so soft _.__

__“You’re scared of touching me now, aren’t you?” Therese asked. Was Carol that obvious?_ _

__“A little. I thought I had ruined everything. I never meant to make you uncomfortable.”_ _

__Therese shook her head. “It’s not you, Carol. I don’t want you to feel that you can’t touch me. In fact, I like when you do. There are just some things …” She took a deep breath. “Some things you don’t know.”_ _

__“It’s fine. You don’t need to explain anything to me. I understand.”_ _

__“Thank you,” Therese said softly. She turned her head slightly towards Carol. “That feels good,” she said and pushed her back into Carol’s hands._ _

__Carol leaned in close and kissed Therese’s cheek. “Do you need me to get your front?” she whispered. Carol was shamelessly flirting and didn’t care – it felt good._ _

__“You’re such a flirt!”_ _

__“Not usually. But there’s something about you that brings it out.” Carol pushed on Therese’s back. “All done.”_ _

__“I hope you don’t mind reapplying in a few hours.”_ _

__“Mind? I look forward to it. Now, you better go get in that water before Rindy all but drags your ass in.”_ _

__“You’re not getting in?”_ _

__“Not right this second. I need a drink and sunscreen.”_ _

__“Need help with the sunscreen?”_ _

__“If you want to help, sure.”_ _

__Carol stood still as Therese’s delicate hands worked her back. It was exhilarating to have a woman touch her again. Every time Therese pressed harder, it sent chills over her body. She closed her eyes and allowed her body to enjoy that wonderful feeling again._ _

__“Are you cold?”_ _

__“No.”_ _

__“Does it feel good?” she whispered._ _

__Carol could only nod in response. She felt tears welling in her eyes. She wanted to stop them, needed to stop them. This wasn’t the time or the place to start crying. Why had she become so emotional all of a sudden? She didn’t realize how badly she needed to be touched. Her body was starved for attention and she hadn’t paid attention until now._ _

__She took a few ragged breaths and tried to speak. “Thank you.” The words came out choked and Therese asked if she was okay._ _

__She sat down on the chair and looked up at Therese. “I didn’t realize how badly I missed being touched.” The tears were starting to fall and she felt like an idiot. “Isn’t that stupid?”_ _

__“I don’t think so.”_ _

__“Would you mind watching Rindy for a minute? I’ll be right back.”_ _

__“Yeah, take your time.”_ _

__“Thanks.”_ _

__Carol went inside and sat down at the table trying to figure out what was happening to her. Feeling Therese’s hands on her back completely shook her to her core. She finally broke down and let herself cry. She hadn’t cried in front of anyone in a long time. When she finally composed herself, she went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” she asked her reflection._ _

__Carol dried her red, puffy eyes, but there was nothing she could do to hide the fact that she had indeed been crying. _When did everything get so complicated?__ _

__Carol pulled herself together and went back outside. She always felt that she needed to be strong for Rindy and everyone else, but sometimes when she was alone, she crumbled. Mostly at night when Rindy was asleep and she was alone with her thoughts, she’d allow herself to be weak and cry._ _

__When she opened the door, she smiled when she saw Rindy and Therese playing together in the lake. Her daughter looked happy with Therese. She walked down to the lake and sat on the dock. Except for the three of them, it was a quiet day. There was a lot of land that the Ross’s owned, so there weren’t any houses that were close. The water felt warm on her feet and there was a slight breeze rustling the trees. Rindy swam to the dock and climbed up. Therese soon followed Rindy and sat down next to Carol._ _

__“Mommy, watch me! I can jump!” Rindy yelled and jumped into the water with a huge splash._ _

__“I see, baby. Good job.” She smiled at her daughter._ _

__“Are you okay?” Therese asked gently._ _

__“I am.” Carol looked out at the lake until Rindy bounded off the end of the dock again. “Thank you for watching her. I don’t know what came over me. I feel like I always need to be in control of my life, like I need to know what’s going to happen next and if I can make it happen, I do. But then something as simple as you putting sunscreen on my back makes me completely fall apart.”_ _

__“To be fair, it wasn’t just about sunscreen. You haven’t been with anyone since Jenna, so it’s understandable. Carol, everyone needs human interaction. I’m not just talking about conversation, but physical interaction. It’s human nature.”_ _

__“I’m sorry for breaking down like that. I feel like such a fool.”_ _

__“I don’t think you are and you don’t need to apologize for being human, Carol.”_ _

__“Have I ruined everything? I’d understand if you’d want to go back. We can leave if you want …”_ _

__Therese interrupted her with a delicate kiss on the lips. “You haven’t ruined anything. I’m right where I want to be.”_ _

__“Therese, I’m broken, I …”_ _

__“Carol, we’re all broken. We’re just looking for the right people that fit our broken puzzle, that’s all. Some fit and some don’t. Don’t think that I’m not broken, because I am.”_ _

__“You’re pretty smart, you know that?” Carol leaned her head on Therese’s shoulder and watched Rindy swim._ _

__“I have my moments,” Therese said with a giggle. “Why don’t I go get us some drinks?”_ _

__“That sounds like a wonderful idea.”_ _

__“Be back in a minute.”_ _

__“Mommy, what’s wrong?” Rindy asked when she swam up to Carol._ _

__“Nothing sweetheart.”_ _

__“You look like you were crying. Are you sad?”_ _

__Children – they pick up on everything. She tried to appease her daughter by telling her that she was fine and tried to divert Rindy’s questions by jumping in the water with her. She played with Rindy for a while until Therese came back with their drinks. Carol pulled herself up on the dock and took the drink from Therese._ _

__It wasn’t even one in the afternoon and Carol felt that she had been through an emotional gauntlet. The alcohol was most definitely going to help._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well? Tell me what you think!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of the night at the lake ...

After dinner, Rindy fell asleep watching cartoons on Netflix. The little girl had taken advantage of the longer days and swam until she was exhausted. Carol and Therese both laughed at how Rindy had practically fallen asleep while she was eating. Carol didn't mind that she fell asleep on the couch since she could see her from the back deck. 

Therese had helped Carol clean up and poured them both some more wine. She was happy that Carol seemed to be in better spirits. Therese had no idea that her actions would cause such a reaction from Carol. She felt sorry for her that she hadn't allowed herself to be with a woman since Jenna. Therese desperately wanted to change that, but knew that it would be difficult to explain her own situation and why she pushed Carol away in the car. 

"You all right?" Carol asked, interrupting Therese's thoughts. "You look like you're a million miles away."

"Oh yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, just in my head a little I guess. I'll finish putting this away. You can go ahead outside if you want and I'll be out in a minute."

"Okay."

She watched Carol walk outside, still wearing her bikini top, but now with shorts on as well. It had been difficult to not stare at her all day. That bikini showed off her incredible body and Therese had been mesmerized by it all day. She enjoyed watching her coming out of the water while the water cascaded off of her toned muscles. That top left little to the imagination and Carol was not lacking in the breast department. Fuck, they were gorgeous; not huge, but definitely not small and they still had plenty of bounce. Therese's mind had wandered quite a few times as to what they looked like without that top restricting them. 

To say she wanted Carol was an understatement. In her mind, she had Carol in various positions that day. She desperately wondered what it would feel like to have Carol's skin against hers, to have her come undone by her hands, her mouth or any other part of her body. To think she hadn't been touched by a woman in three and a half years was mind-boggling. Therese wanted to be the one to change that. The only problem was overcoming her own fears of rejection from Carol.

She met Carol outside and pulled a lounge chair close to hers. Carol was beautiful in the moonlight. They sat in silence and looked at the stars. It was still warm outside, but starting to cool down. This was Therese's favorite time of the year; the days were getting longer, the heat wasn't unbearable and she enjoyed sitting outside with her thoughts at night.

"I had a good time today," Therese said.

"Even after my semi-meltdown?" Carol asked playfully.

"Everyone's entitled to them every now and then."

"I know that Rindy was with us today, so it doesn't technically count as a date, but I was hoping ..."

"It counts as a date to me. This is my favorite kind of date, actually."

"Is that so?"

"Yeah, I don't need to go out to some fancy restaurant. Besides, you learn more about a person when they're in their own element."

"That's certainly true. So, what did you learn about me today?" she asked, looking intently at Therese.

"Well, I learned that you're an even better mother than I knew you to be already. Rindy thinks you hung the moon."

"What else did you learn?"

"That you're even more amazing than I already thought?"

"How's that?"

"You weren't afraid to show me your weaknesses."

"I didn't mean to break down like that."

"I know you didn't, but everyone has weaknesses and fears. And you weren't afraid to show me. Carol, you don't have to always be so strong. You're allowed to show people that you have fears."

"It's not easy for me to do that."

"I know," Therese said and placed her hand on Carol's. "But it shows that you trust me enough to be weak."

"I _do_ trust you. I hope you know that you can trust me as well."

"It's not you that I don't trust. I just have insecurities."

"Everyone does."

Therese let go of Carol's hand and looked out at the lake. The water was still and she could hear the crickets chirping. It was peaceful and she understood why Carol loved it up there. She could get used to spending more time there, hopefully with Carol.

"It's so quiet up here."

"I know, it's one of the reasons why I love it up here. We'll have to plan to come up here one day when you have Evan."

"I'm sure he'd love it."

"So, there's another date in our future?"

"I'm counting on many dates in our future." Therese was sure her confidence and boldness came from the wine.

"Is that so, Miss Belivet?" There was that playful tone that Therese came to love so much.

"Definitely. Especially if you're going to bring me up here."

"So now you're just using me for the lake house?"

"Of course."

"I should throw you in the water for that comment." Carol chuckled.

The thought of Carol picking her up sent chills over her body. _Oh, please pick me up, Carol._ "You wouldn't."

"Care to bet? I'm a lot stronger than I look. I'm an ER doctor, sweetheart. I pick up patients all the time."

"I highly doubt you'd be able to pick me up and carry me to the water to throw me in." She kept up the game only because she _did_ want Carol to make good on her promise.

"I'll give you five seconds to change your mind. After that ... well, I can't promise that you won't get wet."

_Believe me, I am already._ Therese turned her head and stared straight into Carol's eyes.

"One," Carol started to count and Therese didn't budge. "Two." Still no movement. "Three ... you can still change your mind." Nothing. "Four, you sure you want me to get to five?" Silence. "Just remember, you asked for it." More silence as Therese's heart pounded in her chest with the thought of Carol holding her. "Five." Nothing. A staring contest between the two women. "Oh fine, you're no fun. I'm going inside." Carol stood up and went to the door. Therese followed behind with their glasses. "Here, let me get those," Carol said and took the glasses from Therese.

"You talk a big game." Therese couldn't stop herself – she wanted to feel Carol against her.

"Usually I make good on what I say, but I'm tired." Carol stopped at the door and set the glasses down. She turned to look at Therese. "But tonight isn't any different."

Before Therese knew what happened, Carol scooped her up and headed toward the dock. Therese shrieked, not expecting Carol to actually pick her up and carry her.

"Carol! What are you doing?"

"You said I talk a big game. I'm proving that I'm not all talk." Carol laughed as she picked up her pace heading toward the water.

"Stop!" Therese giggled as she screamed.

"You asked for this, Miss Belivet."

"No! I'm sorry. You're not all talk. I believe you!"

Therese was laughing, but enjoying every second of being in Carol's strong arms.

"I can't stop now or else I'd look like a liar."

"No, don't! Please!" Therese begged when they got to the end of the dock and Carol stood there holding her. She laid her head on the curve of Carol's neck. "Please don't throw me in," she said softly. "I'm sorry." Carol smelled so good even after sweating and swimming all day.

"You want a truce?"

"Yes."

"What are you going to do for me if I do this for you?"

"What do you want?"

"A kiss. A real kiss."

"Will you put me down first?"

Carol gently let go of her legs, but held onto her back. She looked up at Carol, enjoying the height difference between them.

"You're a lot stronger than you look, you know?"

"I told you I was."

Carol leaned down and kissed her softly. Her lips were soft and tasted of wine and heaven. Carol's tongue slipped past her lips and Therese let it into her mouth. Their tongues danced together and Therese's hand moved to the back of Carol's neck. She was soft and warm and Therese felt like she could die right there. Kissing Carol was a moment she had fantasized about so many times in her life and it was better than she ever imagined. When she pulled away, Carol was smiling at her. 

"Thank you for not throwing me in the water."

"I was never going to throw you in, I just really wanted that kiss."

"You know, you could have just asked."

"Yeah, but this way's more fun. Don't you think?"

* * *

After Carol put Rindy in bed, she and Therese both showered and changed. They decided to watch a movie since neither one clearly wanted to go to bed yet. Carol wasn't ready for the night to be over and she was sure that Therese felt the same way. She thought about earlier when she threatened Therese with throwing her in the water and smiled inwardly at the way Therese went along with it. She had to admit that the woman had a fun sense of humor. It took her by surprise, but she always did love women who could take a joke. At first, she didn't think Therese would go along with it because of the incident in the car, but she was obviously more than willing.

She let Therese pick a movie while she got comfortable on the couch. Therese looked lonely on the other side and Carol wasn't sure exactly how to initiate something more intimate. Of course she wanted to hold her, but wasn't sure if her advances would be accepted. Then she thought about that kiss. _That kiss ... Jesus, that was incredible._ That woman could surely kiss well and if she was a good kisser ... _No, Carol. Don't go there, don't think about what else her mouth can do._

They sat in comfortable silence for a while and Carol could tell that Therese was also trying to figure out a way to get closer. This was stupid – they were both grown adults who should be able to voice what they wanted. But they were still trying to understand one another. Should she just ask her to lay down? That seemed too forward. Carol dared to glance at her, hoping that she would get the hint, but Therese must have been too into the movie. _Fuck, how do I make this happen?_

"Therese?"

"Yes?"

Carol motioned for Therese to come closer. Did she overstep boundaries again? She couldn't make out the look on Therese's face. Did she fuck up? No, because Therese was making her way over to Carol and suddenly she felt her heart beating fast in her chest. 

"How about we lie down?" Therese asked.

"Big or little spoon?"

"Little." Just how Carol liked it.

Therese pushed back into Carol once they got comfortable and she wrapped an arm around Therese's waist. The feeling of holding Therese was overwhelming – it felt right. Everything with Therese felt right. Only this time, Carol didn't break down when Therese put her hand over Carol's. She wanted and hoped that the night would end like this; the two of them holding each other.

"I forgot to tell you earlier that you're an excellent kisser," Carol said.

"Well, so are _you_."

"I really like kissing you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"I really like kissing you, too."

"I hope one day that it will lead to more, but for now, I'm enjoying where we are and I hope that you feel the same way."

"I do feel the same way. Being with you is like a dream come true for me."

"I must say that I never thought I would get to this point again. That I would feel this way about someone again. It feels good. It was hard to let myself feel this way, but I'm happy with you. I just want you to know."

"I'm glad you feel that way with me. We can take it slow as you want. I'm not going anywhere."

"Good, because then I'd have to throw you in the lake for real."

Therese laughed and pulled Carol's hand up to place a delicate kiss on it. Damn, it felt good to be with a woman again. To be holding a woman, touching a woman, kissing a woman. And not just any woman, this one. Therese Belivet just may have come along at the right time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd be okay with Carol throwing me in the lake!


	9. Chapter 9

"So, how was it?" Gloria asked her daughter. "Is there a love connection?"

"It was good, Mom. We had a really nice time."

"Just a nice time?"

"Okay, it was really good." Carol couldn't contain her excitement. "I had such a good time with her. She's sweet and funny and she gets me, Mom."

"Were there sparks?"

"Of course. She's absolutely amazing."

"So, you two had sex?"

"No! My god, Mom. I'm not that easy. Besides, I need some time. I haven't been with anyone in a long time and I don't want to rush anything with her."

"That's understandable. Just as long as you two are headed in that direction."

"I think so. It's so different with her. She's unlike anyone I've ever been with."

"I'm happy for you, baby."

"Thanks, Mom."

"And Rindy's crazy about her. She absolutely loves Therese."

"I know," Carol said as she watched her daughter bouncing around on the trampoline that Carol couldn't say no to buying for her.

"Mom, look!" Rindy cried out for her mother as she bounced around and then ran over to her. "Did you see me?"

"I did, sweetheart. Just be careful on that thing."

"I will. Gram, did you know that Therese went with us up to the lake?"

"I did. Your mom told me all about it."

"They kissed. Yuck!"

Carol laughed at her daughter and simultaneously blushed at the same time. 

"Well, people who date each other do that, darling," Gloria tried to explain to her granddaughter. "Who knows, maybe one day, you'll be kissing girls."

"Ew." Rindy scrunched up her face. "I'm not kissing anyone."

"Boys, then?" Gloria asked.

"No way! And I'm not going to sleep with them either like Mommy and Therese."

Oh, now she had really let the cat out. If Carol was blushing before, she was now an inferno. Her daughter was a total snitch!

"How's that?" Gloria turned to her daughter for an explanation.

"We fell asleep on the couch, watching a movie and Rindy woke us up in the morning."

"It seems that you left out that pertinent piece of information."

"I didn't leave it out, I just didn't tell you."

"Mhmm. Care to explain more?"

"There's nothing more to explain. I think Rindy told you everything." Carol looked over at Rindy. "Why don't you go get cleaned up? We're going to eat in a minute."

Rindy went running inside and Carol found it difficult to look at her mother. It wasn't that she didn't want to tell her, but she wanted to wait just a little while longer to see how things would play out with Therese.

"I thought you said that you weren't that easy?"

"Nothing happened, Mom. We just fell asleep together on the couch, that's all."

"Uh huh and were the two of you cuddled up together?"

Carol let out a long sigh. Why was she having to explain anything? She was an adult.

"Yes. Is that so wrong?"

"No, but I find it fascinating that you couldn't tell me."

"I just don't want to put any pressure on the two of us yet. I didn't want to make it seem like it was such a big deal."

"Obviously it is if you couldn't tell me."

Carol knew that her mother was enjoying this way too much.

"Okay, maybe it was kind of a big deal. Mom, it felt so good, but I don't want to get used to it."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm still a little scared that it can all go away so fast."

"But you enjoyed it, right?"

"God yes. To wake up with her in my arms was so incredible and it felt so damn good. I haven't slept that well in a long time."

"Well, just go with it, sweetheart. Do what feels good. Not only does your heart need this, but I'm sure your body does, too."

"Oh my god."

"But you know I'm right."

"Yes, Mom. You _are_ right."

"Of course I am. So, when's the next date?"

"I'm not sure. She's out of town visiting a friend and I have to work the next three nights, so I don't know."

"Well, you know I'll watch Rindy for you whenever you need me to, right?"

"I know."

"Hopefully one of these nights, you'll need me to keep her all night," Gloria said, raising her eyebrows.

"You're loving this."

"I really am," Gloria said, laughing. "So, so much."

* * *

When Therese got home, she unpacked her suitcase and fixed a sandwich. She wanted to see Carol, but she was hungry and she knew that Carol was working nights. She desperately wanted to see her, but she was exhausted from the car ride. Her best friend lived four hours away and while Therese enjoyed the drive, she had been up since early that morning and it was well after midnight. She thought about surprising Carol and just showing up at the hospital, but she was unsure if Carol would have any free time.

She decided to make another sandwich for Carol and surprise her. Would that be too much to just show up like that? Surely Carol wouldn't mind her just showing up out of the blue? She decided to just go ahead before she changed her mind. So off to the hospital she went.

When she got to the emergency room, she was greeted at the desk by a woman that she was friends with in high school. They chatted for a while and Therese was starting to rethink this decision, thinking that it was nuts to just show up at almost two in the morning.

"Anyway, what brings you here?" Nicole asked.

"Oh, I was wondering if Carol Aird is around. She's not expecting me or anything, but if she's too busy, I can leave."

"Carol, huh?" Nicole raised her eyebrows and Therese felt her cheeks grow hot. "I think she might be in her office. I'll call her," she said with a smile.

"Therese?" 

Her heart beat picked up when she heard Carol's voice. _The things that voice does to me._ She turned around to find Carol standing behind her. Damn, she could make a pair of scrubs look good. She wanted to pull on that stethoscope and yank Carol down for a kiss, but she restrained herself. 

"Hi," Therese said.

"What are you doing here?"

"Just got home not too long ago and couldn't sleep." _Lie._ "I thought I'd bring you something to eat."

Carol looked at her and then at Nicole. "I'll be in my office if you need me."

"Sure thing," Nicole said with a wicked smile.

Therese followed Carol to her office and shut the door behind them.

"Well, this is a nice surprise. How was your trip?" Carol asked, standing so close that Therese thought she might faint. Good thing she was with a doctor.

"Good, but I missed you terribly."

"Is that so?" Carol moved closer as Therese stood with her back against the door.

"Mhmm."

The bag fell from her hand and she finally pulled Carol down for a kiss. She’d missed those lips, the same ones that she kissed the night on the dock. Those soft lips that could turn her into a pile of mush in an instant. Their tongues met each other in a slow, deep kiss. _The things this mouth could do to me ..._ Carol pulled back and kissed her softly.

"You _did_ miss me, didn't you?"

"So much." Therese pulled Carol against her and laid her head on her chest. Carol's arms wrapped around her and she was sure that nothing in the world would ever feel more perfect than being in Carol's arms. "I missed this," she said quietly.

"What's that, sweetheart?"

"Being in your arms. I never meant to fall asleep with you that night at the lake, but I don't regret one second of it."

"Neither do I."

"How many more nights do you work after tonight?"

"Just tomorrow night. Why?"

"Because I want to sleep in your arms again."

"I'd love that. I didn't think I'd see you until tomorrow. I'm happy you surprised me."

"You are?"

"Absolutely. So, what'd you bring me to eat."

"Just a sandwich. Nothing exciting."

"You're exciting enough."

Carol sat down at her desk and Therese handed her the sandwich. They ate and talked. Therese told her about her friend and how her trip was. She was gone for five days and Therese thought that she'd lose her mind without seeing Carol for that long. 

"By the way, my daughter is a snitch," Carol said with a chuckle.

"Oh really?"

"She told my mom about you and I sleeping together on the couch."

"Oh my god!"

"I wasn't trying to give out every detail to her, but apparently Rindy has other plans for that."

"You know how kids are."

"I know."

"And my mom doesn't know when to stop. She feels that she needs to know everything." Carol smiled and shook her head. "Of course I don't tell her everything."

"It's okay. You two are close."

"Are you close with your parents?"

"Yeah, they live an hour away, so it's not too far. I go up at least once a month, but I talk to my mom at least every other day."

"Does she know about us?"

"She does. She thinks that it's funny that I'm dating one of Adam's ex-girlfriends."

"It is kind of ironic. Did you tell her that I'm ... your girlfriend?"

"I did. I hope that's okay."

"Of course it is. I'm not trying to hide being with you. I don't care who knows."

"Good, because I'm not trying to hide it either."

"My best friend Abby is coming down from New York next weekend. She can't wait to meet you."

"Really?"

"I hope you don't mind."

"No, I'd love to meet her. How long have you two known each other?"

"We met not long after I moved to New York. We tried to date, but there was no chemistry. It was weird and awkward and we decided that we'd be better off as friends. I met Jenna through her."

"Oh, this should be interesting. She knows all of your secrets, huh?"

"That she does."

Therese yawned and checked her phone for the time. How was it almost three already? She really didn't want to leave, but she knew that she had to get some sleep.

"You should go. It's late and you need to get some sleep."

"I know, but I'd rather stay here with you."

"I know, darling. But you're tired and I'm sure you've been up for a while. I'll see you tomorrow or later today." Carol chuckled. "Working nights can be confusing."

"Will you let me know when you're awake later? I want to see you before you go to work."

"Of course. Text me when you get home, please."

"I will."

Therese kissed Carol before she left and texted her when she got home. She continued to text her for another hour until Carol told her to get off the phone and get some sleep. If Therese had it her way, she'd stay up all night and day talking to Carol. When she finally closed her eyes to try to sleep, she could still feel Carol's arms around her and imagined what it would be like to sleep in the same bed with her. Accidentally falling asleep on a couch was one thing, but purposely sleeping in the same bed was even better. 

Therese thought back to that night that they fell asleep on the couch and how she woke up at some point, safely wrapped in Carol's arms. She consciously made the decision to stay there. She tried to sleep, but was too giddy with the prospect of Carol's next day off from work. One more night, that's all she had to get through until she was asleep in Carol's arms again. How on Earth was she going to be able to make it that long? It seemed like it was a hundred years from now. 

She fell asleep at some point with thoughts of Carol filling her mind and her dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They just can't seem to stay away from each other ...


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You'll finally find out what Therese is hiding and why ...

Carol was finally off work and Therese couldn't wait to see her. She had been waiting patiently all day for Carol to let her know that she was awake. As soon as she did, Therese practically ran to her house. 

"That was quick," Carol said when she answered the door.

"I've been waiting patiently all day to see you."

Therese wrapped her arms around Carol and didn't let go. She wanted to stay there all night, all day. Hell, she could have stayed there the rest of her life and died right there for all she cared. She was safe in those ridiculously strong arms. 

"I missed you," Carol said. "I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. We've had no time together in the last week and a half."

"I know, it's been killing me."

"Me too."

"Where's Rindy?"

"She's staying at a friend's house, down the street."

"Oh, so I have you all to myself?"

"Yes, you do."

Therese desperately wished that they were farther along in their relationship because she could definitely take advantage of being alone with Carol for an entire night. But Carol needed time and she was more than willing to give her that. She also needed to figure out how to explain her scars to Carol and hoped that she would understand. Her fear was Carol rejecting her because of what she already went through with her wife. _How am I supposed to tell her that she doesn't need to worry about me?_ She was sure that she'd find the right way to tell her when the time came.

"Did you hear me?" Carol asked.

"What?"

"I asked if there was anything you wanted to do tonight?"

"Oh, sorry. I was deep in thought. No, not that I can think of. I'm sure you're exhausted anyway."

"Not too exhausted for you."

_How does she do that? How can she arouse me so damn fast?_

"Movie then? Popcorn?" Therese asked.

"Sounds good to me. I'll get the popcorn. You pick out something."

"Do you have a preference?"

"What'd you have in mind?"

"Maybe something funny?"

"Are you not a romance kind of girl?"

"Actually, yes." Therese blushed. "But some people don't like watching romance, so I don't mind. There also aren’t that many great lesbian romance movies."

"What about Desert Hearts?"

"I've actually never seen it, if you can believe that."

"I have it. It's in the drawer under the tv. You can get it while I get the popcorn."

"Is it any good?"

"Mhmm." Carol nodded and smirked. She seemed to know something that Therese didn't. 

Therese put in the DVD and waited for Carol to meet her on the couch. 

"Is there something you're not telling me?" she asked. "About the movie, I mean."

"Well ... there's a pretty steamy sex scene."

"Oh." Therese blushed and looked back at the tv.

"You're cute when you blush," Carol said and motioned for Therese to sit closer to her. Therese slowly made her way to the other side of the couch. "It's just sex, sweetheart. Nothing to be embarrassed about," she whispered.

"I'm not embarrassed," she said softly.

"Then why the blushing?"

"I don't know. Can we stop talking about it?"

"Not if you keep blushing like that. It's adorable." Carol wrapped her arm around Therese's shoulders and pulled her close. "Besides, don't you think that maybe one day, we'll do that?"

She swallowed hard. If she had it her way, she'd have Carol right there on the couch. It was all she could think about lately and that's probably why she was blushing so much because she thought about how often she had laid in bed touching herself to fantasies of Carol and her naked together.

"I hope so. I've thought about it," Therese admitted.

"Oh yeah?"

"Haven't you?"

"I have," Carol replied and kissed her on the cheek. "Sometimes when I'm alone," she whispered seductively in Therese's ear. "Do you think about it when you're alone?" Therese understood the question - she was asking if Therese pleasured herself to thoughts of Carol.

"Yes," she breathed out.

“Good, I’m not alone in that aspect I suppose.”

“Definitely not alone.”

Therese got comfortable and settled in against Carol. Somehow her head ended up in Carol’s lap. It felt good to be so close to someone again, to feel Carol’s fingers running through her hair. She didn’t even make it to the sex scene because she was passed out well before then. She felt Carol shaking her awake.

“Therese, baby wake up. Come on, let’s get you to bed.”

“Is it over?”

“Yeah, you fell asleep on me … literally. But I’m not complaining.” Carol leaned down and kissed her forehead.

“I’m sorry. I guess I was more tired than I thought.”

“It’s fine, babe. Do you want to go to bed?”

“With you? Of course. But I didn’t bring anything to sleep in.”

“I’m sure I have something that you can wear. I’ll get you a toothbrush, too. Come on.”

Therese followed her to the bedroom and Carol found a pair of shorts and a t-shirt for her to wear. She went to the bathroom to change. When she took off her pants, she looked down at her legs. How was she seriously going to tell Carol that at one point in her life, she tried to kill herself? And would Carol accept her the way she was or not? She wasn’t the same girl that she used to be, but she had the scars of that depressed teenager that she was. The scars of someone who had to cut herself to feel something, the scars of the cuts that were too deep when she tried to end it all. 

Going over the conversation with Carol in her head was an easy thing to do, but having to actually say the words was something completely different. Showing her body to other partners was different; she didn’t care about them the way that she cared about Carol and they didn’t have a wife that killed herself. Therese knew that she was in a difficult position. She was going to have to tell her eventually, but how?

“You okay in there?” Carol called.

“Yeah, be out in a minute.” She quickly changed and opened the door to the bathroom to see Carol waiting for her in bed. Now _that_ was a sight that she could get used to.

“You look cute in my clothes.”

Therese blushed again, thinking about being in Carol’s clothes, her bed, her arms. She quickly climbed under the blanket and felt Carol pull her close against her. How was she supposed to actually sleep when her heart was beating so fast?

“Just breathe, sweetheart.”

“It’s a little difficult.” Therese could feel Carol’s nipples harden against her back and Carol’s smooth legs against hers. To add to Therese’s stress of lying with Carol, she could feel that she was only wearing a pair of underwear and a shirt to sleep in.

“Why’s that?” Carol asked playfully.

“I think you know.”

“Tell me.”

“Well, there’s not much separating us. Just clothes and I can feel your nipples poking me.”

Carol laughed and so did Therese. She would never tire of hearing that woman laugh.

“That’s what you do to me. I don’t think my body’s had a reaction like this to another woman since Jenna. It’s nice.”

“I’m still surprised that you haven’t been with anyone since her.”

“I don’t know, I guess I lost my sex drive after she died and I had no desire to date. But it’s coming back now.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yep. Thanks to you.” Carol turned Therese slightly to kiss her. “Try to get some sleep, okay.”

That seemed like an impossible feat, but Carol’s body against hers was comforting and her arms were gently wrapped around her. Therese fell asleep with a smile on her face.

* * *

“Oh my god, is that Abby Gerhard?” Carol asked when Abby exited the taxi in front of her house.

“Jesus Carol, how the hell do you live here? There’s not a city around for miles.”

“Oh, calm down, princess,” Carol said and went to greet her best friend. “How are you?” She gave her a hug and helped with her luggage.

“Better now. God, I miss you.”

“I miss you, too. How was the trip?”

“Not bad, but I wasn’t expecting you to live so far out.”

“It’s not that far, Abby.”

“Aunt Abby!” Rindy screamed and barreled into Abby.

“Hey, squirt! How are you?”

“Mommy bought me a trampoline! Do you wanna watch me jump?” the little girl asked, her eyes beaming.

“After I get settled, yes, I’d love to watch you.”

“Mommy doesn’t like to jump with me, but Therese does.”

“Is that so?” Abby asked, looking at Carol.

“Oh, stop,” Carol said.

“What? Just curious.”

“I know you are.”

“Will I get to meet her?”

“Of course you will.”

“Mommy and Therese kiss and it’s gross.” Rindy wrinkled her nose when she said it.

Abby knelt down in front of the little girl. “What else do Mommy and Therese do that’s gross?”

“They’re always holding hands and touching each other and kissing. They sleep in the same bed, too. Yuck!”

“Interesting,” Abby said and looked up at a blushing Carol.

“Sweetheart, why don’t you help your aunt with her things.”

Rindy grabbed one of Abby’s bags and went inside.

“Scared your daughter’s going to give away all your secrets?” Abby smirked and Carol slapped her arm.

“I think she already did.”

“Sleeping together, huh?”

“It’s not like that, Abby. We just sleep, that’s all.”

“That’s all? Shouldn’t you be doing more?”

“Jesus, you’ve been here less than five minutes and I’m already being grilled.”

“Just trying to make sure that your sex life is alive and well.”

“I don’t have one … yet. Could we please talk about something else?”

“No, I want to meet her.”

Carol looked past Abby and saw Therese walking towards them.

“Well, it looks like you won’t have to wait long.” Carol nodded towards Therese.

“That her?”

“Mhmm.”

“God, you’re in love,” Abby said, looking at Carol.

“What are you talking about?”

“Carol … come on. The way you’re looking at her says it all. Have you told her that you’re madly in love with her?”

“Not yet and you better be on your best behavior.”

“When have you known me to hold back?”

“Jesus, this is a bad idea.”

“Calm down, Carol. I’ll be good … for you, but only for you.”

“Thank you.”

“She’s cute,” Abby whispered right before Therese approached. “You must be Therese,” she said and held out her hand. 

“You must be the infamous Abby Gerhard.” Therese shook her hand and smiled at the two women.

“Infamous? Does my reputation precede me?”

“I’ve been told that you know all of Carol’s secrets.”

“Oh, I do. And if you get me drunk enough, I’ll spill them all.”

“What do you like to drink?” Therese asked.

_Oh Christ, these two women are going to drive me mad._

“Whiskey.”

“I’ll get some while I’m out.”

“Where are you going?” Carol asked.

“I have to go down to the office, then to the store, and then pick up Evan, but I’ll be back later. I’ll let you two catch up.”

“Okay, be careful,” Carol leaned over to kiss her cheek.

“I will. It was nice meeting you, Abby. I can’t wait to hang out later. I’m sure we have a lot to talk about.”

“We most definitely do.”

“See you both later!” Therese waved goodbye.

“Oh, I like her,” Abby said when Therese walked away.

“You’re going to try to embarrass the shit out of me, aren’t you?”

“You know me too well. Has she seen your scar?” Abby smirked.

“Well, since she hasn’t seen me naked, that would be a no.”

“Oh, that’s a fun story. I can’t wait to tell her _that_ one.”

“That’s a story you can’t tell in front of the kids.”

“Obviously. I don’t think that Rindy needs to know that her mother has a scar on her tit from some seriously rough sex.”

“Jesus Christ.” Carol shook her head. “Why are you here again?” she asked playfully.

“Because you love and miss me.”

“I don’t know why.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Carol's in loooooove!!


	11. Chapter 11

“So, Carol tells me you’re a writer?” Abby asked Therese.

“Just columns and for the local paper.”

“Don’t be so modest, sweetheart,” Carol said and kissed Therese’s cheek. “She’s written for magazines, probably some that you’ve read.”

“It’s not that big of a deal, Carol.”

“Do you plan on writing your own book?”

“I suppose.” Therese wasn’t ready to tell anyone about her love of lesbian romance novels and the fact that she was writing her own.

“Really?” Carol asked. “I didn’t know that.”

“It’s nothing really. Just an idea that I’ve had, that’s all.”

“You should tell me about it sometime.”

“Maybe later. Right now, I want to hear all about you.” Therese turned to Abby. “Are you drunk enough to tell me about Carol?”

“What do you want to know?”

“I’m right here. You can ask me, you know?” Carol poked her in her side.

“Yeah, but Abby has a different perspective on you than you do on yourself, darling. Are you embarrassed?”

“Maybe. Depends on what Abby tells you.”

“Oh, this is going to be good.”

“Nothing embarrassing … yet,” Abby said, smirking.

“You two are going to kill me,” Carol said, rolling her eyes.

Therese enjoyed listening to the two women reminisce. Abby was extremely animated when she spoke and Therese understood why the two of them were such close friends. She was sure that Abby had a hard time being so far away from her best friend. The two had obviously spent a lot of time together when Carol lived in New York City. She knew what that felt like to not live close to your best friend. She tried to see her best friend Amelia as much as she could, but there were four hours separating them and they tried to see each other at least once every two months.

She was learning a lot about Carol from Abby and what her girlfriend had been like before she moved back home. She also learned that Rindy’s biological father was Jenna’s cousin Harge, who was a theater actor in the city. Apparently they wanted someone who would resemble Jenna since Carol would be the one to carry the baby. She also learned that Carol and Jenna married in Massachusetts in 2005 and Carol decided to take Jenna’s last name. 

Learning about Carol’s past life was fascinating. Abby wasn’t afraid to open up and Carol didn’t seem to mind. She seemed somewhat relieved since she wasn’t the one answering all the questions and Abby could fill in the rest. 

Evan and Rindy had played hard all night and were passed out on the couch after a movie. Carol insisted that she and Evan stay and that their situation shouldn’t be any different just because Abby was staying. Carol took the kids to bed and Therese poured herself another glass of wine.

“So, do you want to know something really crazy about Carol?” Abby asked with a gleam in her eye. Therese _almost_ felt wrong about it.

“Yes.”

“She has a scar …”

“Above my left nipple, yes,” Carol finished when she walked into the kitchen. “You know, you’re not very quiet even though you think you are.”

“How did you get a scar above your nipple?” Therese asked through her laughter.

“Ask that one.” Carol pointed at Abby. “It’s her fault.”

“Now I _have_ to hear this.”

“Oh, don’t look at me. She’s the one who brought it up,” Carol said.

“Well …” Abby started, but couldn’t control her laughter. “I’m sure Carol’s told you that we’ve dated before.”

“She has.”

“Well, there wasn’t a whole lot of chemistry, but we _did_ enjoy the sex. Anyway, it got a little rough one night.” Abby was beginning to slur her words and Therese was just as drunk, so she couldn’t help but laugh. “So, Carol’s nipple was in my mouth and she told me to suck harder.”

Therese looked at Carol and her entire face was red, but Therese found it to be adorable.

“So, I suck harder, but I was a little drunk and we were a little rough with each other that night. Well, I bit down. _Accidentally_ , I might add.”

“That was no accident. You bit down on purpose.”

“Whatever. Anyway, I bit down and drew blood.”

“Oh my god!” Therese exclaimed.

“And now, she has a nice little scar because of me. Is it still there?”

“Yes, it’s still there.”

“Why don’t you show Therese?”

“That’s enough alcohol for you. I’m cutting you off, Abigail.”

“Fine by me. I’m tired anyway.”

“Do you need help getting to bed?” Carol asked.

“No, I’m fine. You two be good tonight.” Abby winked. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” they both said to her as she left.

“I can’t believe you have a scar above your nipple,” Therese said, still surprised at Abby’s revelation.

“We all have scars, darling. Both inside and out.”

_Oh, how true that is._

* * *

Therese woke up the next morning with a headache. She left Carol in bed, snoring as loud as she could. She chuckled, never hearing Carol snore like that and assumed that it was from the alcohol.

When Therese got to the kitchen, she could smell coffee already. She didn’t see anyone awake, but caught a glimpse of Rindy and Evan bouncing on the trampoline. Then she saw Abby sitting outside watching them. Her head was pounding and she found some ibuprofen to help relieve her headache. She was sure the caffeine would help as well. She met Abby outside and sat down beside her.

“Well, good morning,” Abby said, a little too chipper for someone who drank so much the night before.

“Ugh, my head is killing me. How are you so awake right now?”

“The kids woke me up.” Abby shrugged and took a sip of her coffee. “How are _you_ feeling?”

“Like shit. I shouldn’t have drank so damn much last night.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, but I can’t promise that I’ll have an answer with this pounding headache.”

“How do you feel about Carol?”

“How do you mean?”

“I mean, you’re crazy about her, right?”

“I guess you could say that. She’s an amazing woman. I’ve never met anyone quite like her.” Therese rubbed her forehead, trying to focus on the conversation. She wasn’t expecting Abby to jump right into feelings the second she woke up, but she had no intention of hiding her feelings for Carol.

“I understand if you don’t want to tell me exactly how you feel about her. I’m her best friend and I know it would be uncomfortable for you. It’s just that Carol means a lot to me and I don’t want to see her get hurt. Not that I think that you would hurt her. I just worry about her, that’s all. But it’s obvious that you’re crazy about her.”

“Is it really that obvious?” Therese couldn’t help the blush creeping on her cheeks.

“Oh sweetheart, the two of you are ridiculously in love with each other. It’s obvious to anyone with eyes.” Abby winked at her.

Was that true? Was Carol in love with her? It was definitely a dream of hers: Carol in love with her.

“How long have the two of you been dating?” Abby asked.

“A few weeks. Not long enough to know if I’m in love with her.” Oh, who was she kidding? She had been in love with Carol since she was a kid.

“But sometimes you just know. I can tell that Carol really likes you. I know her better than she knows herself.”

“You sure about that? You can tell that Carol likes me?”

“Absolutely. She can’t hide it.”

“Well, _I_ really can’t hide it. But I don’t want to move too fast. I really care about her and I want this to work.”

“Are the two of you out here talking about me?” Carol asked when she opened the door.

“Always,” Abby said without missing a beat.

Carol gave Therese a kiss on the cheek and sat down next to her.

“Look at you two,” Abby said.

“What?” Carol asked.

“Nothing. You’re cute, that’s all.”

“When did you get so mushy?”

“I don’t know, must be from being around the both of you.”

Therese smiled at Carol. Were they mush? Did she care? Hell no. She was happy with Carol. Happy with waking up with her, going to bed with her, spending her time with Carol. 

She looked over at Evan playing with Rindy. He even seemed to be happy. The two of them played together really well. They almost never disagreed on anything. Rindy seemed to be a tomboy, so she always went along with whatever he wanted to do. It warmed Therese’s heart that the two of them got along so well.

“How long have they been up?” Therese asked, looking at the kids still happily bouncing around.

“For about an hour and a half,” Abby replied.

“Have you eaten anything or have you just been drinking coffee since you woke up?”

“Just coffee, but the kids ate.”

“I’ll go fix us something,” Therese said.

“Oh Carol, you got yourself a woman who can cook, huh?” Abby asked, winking at Therese. “Is she any good in the kitchen?”

“She’s pretty good, Abby.”

“I can cook for us tonight if you want. Carol’s been wanting to learn anyway,” Therese said and kissed Carol softly on the lips. “You can be my sexy sous chef,” she whispered.

Therese went inside to fix breakfast for everyone. She figured the kids would be hungry from all the bouncing and energy they’d been burning. Evan ate like a horse anyway, so she _knew_ he’d be hungry. 

When Therese thought about waking up at Carol’s house with everyone there, she was surprised at how normal it all felt to her. They were slowly becoming this little family unit that Therese was getting accustomed to. Even though she and Carol had yet to be truly intimate with each other, she was enjoying their relationship and the path that it was taking. Carol made her feel different from anyone she had ever been with and taking it slow with Carol was important to her. The last thing she wanted was to think that Carol only wanted her for the sex and she didn’t want Carol to think that it was only lust from her. She had real feelings for Carol and she wasn’t going to ruin it by having sex with her right away.

Therese looked out the window in the kitchen to see Abby and Carol laughing raucously about something. She could only imagine what it was, but she enjoyed seeing Carol with her best friend. The image warmed her heart. Therese loved having Abby there as well. Abby clearly played a very active role in Carol’s life and it was important for Therese that she and Abby get along. And they definitely hit it off well. Therese enjoyed Abby’s company and a drunk Abby was even wilder than a sober Abby. She wondered how much trouble Abby and Carol had gotten in to when they were younger. Abby could be persuasive and Therese was sure that she talked Carol into quite a bit throughout the years.

“Therese, sweetheart,” Carol called from the deck.

“Yes,” Therese said when she opened the door.

“I was thinking that we should take Abby and the kids up to the lake today. What do you say, you want to go?”

_The kids._ That sounded so domestic and Therese wondered if Carol realized how it sounded. Abby definitely caught it because one of her eyebrows shot up right after Carol said it and Therese had to suppress a laugh.

“Absolutely. I’m sure Evan would love it. I know I would. Abby?”

“Why the hell not. What else is there to do in this town anyway,” Abby said with a wave of her hand.

“Why don’t you move here, Abby?” Therese asked. “You might like it here.”

“Oh, Abby’s not leaving the city. Too many women that need her attention,” Carol said with a smirk.

“Are you implying that I’m a slut?”

“Never dear. Just that you love the women.”

“Well, you’re not wrong there. I _do_ love the women.”

“And they love you right back,” Carol replied.

“It’s not that bad here, Abby. You never know what you’ll find here. You could find the love of your life,” Therese said.

Abby opened her mouth to speak and Carol shot her a warning glare before she spoke.

“I could never leave the city. I love it too much there,” Abby said. “Is breakfast ready?” she asked, clearly changing the subject.

“It is when you are.”

Abby went inside to eat and Carol pulled Therese into her lap.

“What are you doing?” Therese asked through her giggling.

“Just enjoying my girlfriend.” Carol pulled Therese to her and kissed her softly. “I’m glad that you and Abby get along. It means a lot to me.”

“I like Abby. She’s wild.”

“Oh, you have no idea.” Carol’s hand roamed Therese’s back and it sent a shiver down her spine. “I’m so happy you’re in my life,” she said softly. “I didn’t think that I’d be happy with someone again, but you’ve changed that. I feel alive again with you. It’s been a while since I’ve felt this way, if I ever have.”

“You make _me_ happy, Carol. I love being with you.”

“Okay lovebirds, let’s eat already,” Abby called from the kitchen.

_Oh Abby, if you only knew how much I love your best friend …_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Abby bit down on purpose! Haha!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that I haven't gotten around to replying to all of your comments. Work has come in the way and has me exhausted. Just know that I read all of them and appreciate everyone who takes the time to read and comment. It really does mean so much to me.

"Mommy!" Rindy shouted.

"Sweetheart, you don't have to scream. I'm right here," Carol said and knelt down in front of her daughter. "Now, what is it you need?" Carol asked patiently.

"I want swimming shorts like Therese." Rindy pointed to the woman standing next to her.

Carol looked up at Therese and smiled. It was always adorable the way she blushed so easily.

"You want board shorts like Therese has?" Carol wasn't surprised; Rindy was always such a tomboy. And she wasn't surprised that her daughter wanted something that Therese had. Rindy was very much attached to Carol's girlfriend.

"Yeah, I do. Can I get some like hers?"

"Of course you can, darling. We'll get you some."

"Therese, you and me are going to match the next time we come up here!" Rindy exclaimed.

"I know. Isn't that exciting?" Therese asked with a smile.

Rindy wrapped her arms around Therese for a hug and Carol's heart melted at the sight.

"I love you," Rindy said.

_Why was it so easy for kids to say those words?_

"I love you too, Rin."

_Rin ... god, she even has an adorable nickname for her. How can I not love this woman? She's absolutely perfect._

Rindy scurried off to chase Evan into the water, leaving Carol feeling awkward. She was sure that Therese felt the same way.

"She's something else," Carol said, watching Rindy and Evan play in the water.

"She really is. She's a good kid."

"I think she's happy to have someone to play with. I'm sure she gets bored with me and my parents. I mean, she has friends, but Rindy loves having family."

"Well, Evan loves playing with her."

"She's quite the tomboy, isn't she?"

"Definitely. Were you like that at her age?" Therese asked.

"We're practically twins in that aspect. Both tomboys."

"You don't look like a tomboy anymore." Therese gazed at Carol seductively.

_Fuck, how can she do that to me with just a look?_

"Neither do you. Not even in your board shorts." Carol pulled Therese against her. "You look absolutely sexy," she whispered in her ear.

Therese's hands roamed Carol's back and her lips found Carol's neck. She placed a delicate kiss and Carol thought she might die right there. Her mind wandered to what kind of lover Therese was. She was sure that she was soft, tender, and delicate, but forceful in the right situation - a perfect combination.

"Take a breather," Abby said as she approached. "You know, your parents are inside and there _are_ other people around."

"Ha ha," Carol replied sarcastically. "They made it okay?"

"Yeah and your dad has a huge surprise."

"What kind of surprise?"

"A boat."

"A boat?"

"What are you? A bird? Yes, a boat."

"Oh geez. He's been talking about it since I moved back. I know he's been dying to take Rindy out on a boat. I can't believe he actually bought one."

"Believe it."

"See what you're missing by not living here?" Carol asked. "You could be boating with us all the time."

"First Therese. Now you. Are you two really trying to get me to move here?"

"I'm only in it for the free babysitting," Therese quipped.

"Who says I wouldn't charge you?"

"What if I pay you in alcohol?"

"Oh, that might work." Abby winked.

"I have to go see this boat," Therese said. "Are you coming?"

"Not without my vibrator," Abby quickly replied and Therese blushed.

"Abby!" Carol exclaimed.

"Like we all haven't used one."

"Go. I'll be there in a minute," Carol said and kissed Therese.

"You are so bad," Carol said when Therese walked away.

"When are the two of you going to get it on, anyway?"

"Not _everything_ revolves around sex, Abby."

"It should for you. I'll bet you're dying. How long's it been?"

" _Too_ long."

"All the more reason for you to try to jump all over her. What's taking so long with you two anyway?"

"It's not taking long. We've only been dating a short time."

"Carol, let me give you some advice. Life is too fucking short. You, of all people, should know that by now. Tell her how you feel. Tell her you love her." Carol tried to interrupt, but Abby held up her hand. "And before you say anything, it's written all over your face; you're crazy in love with her. Your mother thinks so, too."

"So the both of you are discussing my love life?"

"Maybe. But you know what? You never looked at Jenna the way you look at Therese."

"Is that wrong?" Carol felt guilty about the fact that she may have stronger feelings for Therese than she ever did for her wife. She knew that the feelings she had for Therese were stronger than anything she'd ever felt before.

"No, it's not. Don't feel guilty about that."

"I do," Carol said softly.

"You shouldn't. Jenna would want you to be happy and you know that."

"I know. I just didn't expect to feel this way about anyone. It's kind of overwhelming."

"Tell _her_ that, not me."

* * *

After a long day on the boat, Therese cooking for everyone and the kids passing out on the couch, Carol took them both to bed and made her way back to the kitchen. Her parents and Abby were playing poker and drinking. This was definitely a typical visit for Abby; she always ended up talking them into poker and drinking. Abby was definitely the sister she never had and her parents loved Abby as their own. She looked around for Therese, but didn't see her.

"She's outside," Abby said, winking.

Carol went outside to find Therese sprawled out on one of the lounge chairs and drinking a glass of wine. She was content with the sight in front of her. She knew she could get used to ending her days with Therese.

"Any room for me there?" Carol asked.

Therese patted the spot between her legs for Carol to lie down. Her head rested on Therese's chest and Therese's arms wrapped around her.

"Did you enjoy yourself today?" Carol asked.

"I did. I'm exhausted now."

"It was a long day."

"I love it up here. It's so peaceful and calming."

"It _is_ nice," Carol said as she looked out over the lake. The moon was bright and reflected off of the lake. "Therese?"

"Yes?"

"Remember when I told you that I needed time until we have sex?"

"I do."

"Well ... I think I'm ready." She felt Therese tense around her and worried that maybe it was too soon. "Is something wrong?"

"No. I think ... I just need a little more time is all."

"Oh, well that's fine.”

“Can I ask what changed your mind?"

"Abby. She made a point earlier about life being too short. Which brings up another point. Therese, I want you to know how I feel about you."

"I think I already know," Therese said and kissed the top of Carol's head.

"I know, but I need to tell you. I think you're the most amazing woman in the world. You're kind and caring and the sweetest person I know. The truth is … I love you. I don't want it to be a big deal, but that's how I feel and I want you to know that. You don't need to say it back, I just want you to know." Carol felt like she was rambling and was almost hoping for an interruption from anyone, but none came. "Honestly, you don't have to say it back, but Abby was right when she said that life's too short ..."

"Carol, you're rambling." Therese laughed and pulled Carol closer against her. "I think I just need a little time."

"That's fine," Carol quickly replied. "I'm not trying to pressure you. I just want you to know that I'm ready for everything with you."

“I understand.”

“Did I just make everything awkward?” Carol asked after what felt like an uncomfortable silence.

“Not at all,” Therese said and kissed Carol.

“Good.” Carol hoped that she didn’t just scare Therese away with her love confession, but she wanted her to know. “Abby really likes you, you know?”

“I know. I really like her, too. Do you think she’s happy living in the city? I mean, I’m sure she misses you and Rindy.”

“I know she misses us, but Abby loves the city. I don’t think I could ever convince her to move here. I wish I could because I miss having her around.”

“Hell, I’m going to miss having her around,” Therese said with a giggle.

“Talking about me?” Abby asked from the doorway.

“We were, actually,” Carol said.

“We’re going to miss you when you leave, Abby. You should visit more often,” Therese said. 

“I’m sure I will. I can’t stay away from Carol and Rindy for too long,” Abby said and sat down on a chair next to them. “Something tells me that I’m going to miss you, too.” Abby winked at Therese.

The budding friendship between Abby and Therese warmed Carol’s heart. She didn’t realize how important it was for her that the two women get along until now. Maybe because she felt that Therese was her future? _Is she? I hope so …_

“Who won at poker?” Therese asked.

“I did. As usual,” Abby replied confidently.

“Abby _does_ love to gamble.”

“Have you told Therese about the trip we took to Vegas?” Abby asked Carol

“God, no. Not yet.”

“Oh, that’s a fun one,” Abby said, laughing.

“For another time, Abigail.”

“Okay, I’ll save that for next time.”

Abby said goodnight and went inside to go to bed, but Carol knew that she was only going inside to leave her and Therese alone. Carol took a deep breath and enjoyed being in Therese’s arms. She was soft and warm and smelled so damn good. If Carol had it her way, they’d be alone and she’d cover every inch of Therese’s body with her mouth. Her thoughts wandered to what Therese tasted like. _God, it’s been so long and I want her so badly._

“What are you thinking?” Therese asked.

“Oh, I don’t think you want to know.”

“That dirty, huh?”

“Probably more than you’re imagining.”

“I’m sorry for making you wait.”

“Don’t you ever apologize for that. Besides, I can take care of myself until then. I’ve been doing it for years.”

“Mmmm. How often?”

“How often do I masturbate? Is that what you’re asking me, Miss Belivet?”

“Yes.”

“Lately, a lot more than usual.”

“Really?”

“Uh huh. It’s daily at this point. You do something to me. I haven’t felt this in a long time. It’s nice.”

“So … how do you do it?”

“Are you asking me how to pleasure a woman?”

“No, silly,” Therese said, laughing. “I mean, do you use your imagination or do you watch porn? How do you do it?”

“Sometimes both, but my imagination is pretty good. Especially since you came along.”

“So, you’re thinking about me?”

“Most definitely.”

“What do you think about?”

“You’re awfully curious.” Carol found it amusing that Therese was so interested in her alone time, but she was more than willing to tell her.

“I am.”

“Well, lately what gets me off most is thinking about making you come undone with my mouth. To be honest, I’m dying to know what you taste like.” Carol’s heart thudded in her chest at her admission.

“Fuck,” Therese breathed out. Carol felt Therese’s breathing slow down.

“I love the way women taste.”

“Jesus, are you trying to kill me?”

“No, just trying to make you come.”

“You do, you know?”

“Is that so?” Now it was Carol’s turn to find out if Therese was masturbating to thoughts of her. “Do you think about me a lot when you masturbate?”

“All the time. Seeing you in that bikini … Jesus, it’s almost too much. You’re so fucking sexy and I don’t even think you realize it.”

“So, what about the bikini does it for you?”

“All of it, really, but if I’m being honest … you have the most incredible breasts.”

“So, you’re a boob girl, huh?”

“I can’t even deny it.” Therese laughed. “I most definitely am.”

“Well, that’s good to know. You still haven’t told me your dirty thoughts while you masturbate, yet.”

“Shit, now I have to tell you, huh?”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“No, it’s only fair. I’ve thought so much about my mouth on your breasts. Feeling your nipples harden in my mouth and my hand traveling down that gorgeous stomach only to end up between your legs.”

“Fuck, now I think you’re trying to kill _me_.”

“I can’t help it, you’re so beautiful. It does things to me, to my body that drive me crazy.”

“All this talk of masturbation, are we going to be able to sleep in the same bed tonight?”

“I can’t imagine sleeping without you. Is it wrong that I look forward to going to bed lately?”

“Not at all. I do the same thing,” Carol answered honestly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooohhh, Carol's in love! (Like we didn't know.)


	13. Chapter 13

Therese woke up and looked around. No Carol, but her perfume hit her nostrils and she smiled. It was fairly normal for her to wake up in Carol’s bed or for Carol to wake up in hers. But honestly, she much rather enjoyed the scent of Carol’s bed than her own.

Carol had already left for work and Therese hated waking up without her, but it was Carol’s last day of the rotation. She would be off for the next five days and Therese had decided that she was going to make at least one night for them to be alone.

It had been three weeks since Carol had told her that she was ready to have sex. Therese had gone through every scenario that she could to explain her scars and assure her that she was better. The therapy along with the medication after her attempted suicide changed her for the better. She was no longer that depressed teenager she used to be; it had taken a while to get to her current mental state, but she truly felt much better than she did seventeen years ago.

For three days, she had been planning on their night alone and thought about how their date would go. Ultimately, she decided to try to not make it a big deal; just another night together and explaining her scars in a way that Carol would both understand and know that she wouldn’t have to worry. It all seemed so complicated and she _was_ worried about Carol’s reaction.

She was lost in her thoughts when she heard her phone buzzing. She quickly picked it up, hoping that it wouldn’t wake Rindy. _Carol._

“Hello, beautiful,” Therese said softly, still sleepy.

“Hello, yourself. I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“I just woke up, actually.”

“It was so hard to leave you this morning. You looked so comfortable and adorable laying there. I wanted to stay in bed with you all day.”

“I wish you would have.”

“That’s what I plan on doing tomorrow.” Carol’s voice was a lot lower than it was a few seconds ago and hit Therese right between her legs.

“That sounds wonderful. I don’t know that we could stay in bed _all_ day because I’m sure Rindy would force us to get up at some point, _but_ it sounds like an excellent plan.”

“Oh, you don’t know Rindy well enough because that girl loves to stay in bed with me and watch movies all day. We’ve done it more than once, so be prepared.”

Therese laughed because that definitely sounded like Rindy to be by her mother’s side, in bed, all day. Rindy and Carol were close and Therese loved that she fit right in Rindy’s life without an issue. There were a few times that she woke up in the middle of the night and Rindy was sandwiched right in between her and Carol and it never bothered her. In fact, she relished it because she knew that Rindy felt secure with her.

“I don’t have a problem with that at all. You think Rindy will like some of the older movies?”

“Rindy doesn’t care as long as she’s with us.”

_Us._ She loved the sound of that.

“Speaking of, I think she’s awake. I hear movement.”

“Oh, she’s going to be bothering you for either pancakes or french toast. You know that, right?”

“I already promised her last night that I would fix her whatever she wanted this morning.”

“You’re going to spoil her. You don’t have to; she’s already crazy about you.”

“I know, but I can’t help it.”

“What am I going to do with you?” Carol laughed.

_That_ was a loaded question.

“Stay in bed with me tomorrow? Oh, and I was thinking that maybe we could be alone tomorrow night?”

“Yep, can’t resist that,” Carol replied. “I’m being paged. I’ll talk to you later, sweetheart. Tell Rindy I love her.”

“I will.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” It felt so normal to say that, even though it accidentally slipped out. It was the first time she said that and it didn’t even bother her; she _did_ love Carol.

“Wow,” Carol said. “I certainly wasn’t expecting that.”

“Me either, but it’s how I feel,” Therese said honestly. “Go save lives, my sexy doctor.”

“Goodbye.” Oh, Carol was definitely smiling; Therese could hear it in her voice.

She heard the pitter patter of little feet scurrying down the hall. The sound made her miss Evan on mornings like this. Not having him all the time was frustrating, but she would never take him away from Cody; he was an excellent father and Evan adored him. Still, it was difficult to not have him all the time.

It was starting to feel as if she was a second parent to Rindy; they spent a lot of time together when Carol was at work and she took care of her. She truly loved Rindy like her own child.

“Therese!” Rindy yelled as she came running into the bedroom and jumped on the bed. 

“Hey, Rin.”

“You’re awake. Will you make me pancakes?”

The girl’s eyes lit up with excitement. Therese always loved how excited Rindy would get over the smallest thing.

“Yes, sweetheart. I’ll make you pancakes.”

“With strawberries?”

“Sure.”

The little girl rushed out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. Therese laughed as she followed behind. Just like her mother with the strawberries. She loved them almost as much as Carol.

* * *

“Hey you,” Therese said as Carol opened the door.

“Well, hello yourself.” Carol kissed her on the cheek. “You’re a nice surprise. I thought maybe you and Rindy would be at your house.”

“I wanted to be here when you got home. I have a surprise waiting for you.”

“You do, huh?” Carol looked exhausted.

“Uh huh. Did you have a long day?”

“I did. So, tell me about this surprise.”

“Well, I thought maybe you’d like a bath when you got home. It’s ready for you in your bathroom.”

“That sounds wonderful. Thank you so much, darling.”

“Go take your bath and dinner will be ready by the time you get out.”

“Dinner, too? You’re full of surprises.”

“Rindy helped.”

It was then that Rindy came running in to greet her mother. 

“Mommy, I helped Therese make dinner!”

“I heard,” Carol replied and leaned down to kiss her daughter.

“Is it ready yet?” Rindy asked Therese.

“Not yet, sweetheart. After your mother takes her bath, it’ll be ready.”

“You really didn’t have to do all of this.”

“Go on, take your bath.”

“Care to join me?” Carol whispered into her ear causing her to blush. “I’m only teasing, but I love it when you blush.”

“Stop being so bad and go bathe.”

“But being bad is what I do best.” Carol winked and walked upstairs.

After dinner, they cleaned up and decided to go for a walk. The three of them walked around the block with Rindy between them, holding one of her mother’s hands and one of Therese’s. Therese was sure she’d never been so happy in her life until this point. 

When they got back to the house, Carol and Therese both helped to get Rindy ready for bed. Therese went to Carol’s room and changed for bed. Any time that she knew that she’d be staying with Carol, she made sure to wear underwear long enough that covered her scars. Sometimes it got to be too much to go through all the trouble to hide her secret, but she wasn’t comfortable enough just yet. However, she knew that she was getting closer to that point when she _could_ tell Carol.

“You look adorable in your long underwear.”

“Oh …” Therese looked down, making sure everything was covered. “Thanks.”

“Don’t be shy, I’ve seen you in them many times and I never get tired of it.” 

Carol pulled her down on the bed with her and kissed her. Therese’s breathing was faster and she knew she wouldn’t be able to last long with a kiss like this one. Carol bit down on her bottom lip and Therese let out a small whimper. 

“What the hell are you doing to me?” Therese asked.

“Just kissing you. You have incredible lips.”

“Yours aren't so bad, either.”

“So, you want to be alone tomorrow night, huh?”

“I do.”

“What made you come to that decision?” Carol propped herself up on her elbow and Therese had never seen anything sexier in her life.

“You’re just so incredible and it’s getting difficult to sleep with you without wanting to be naked. Sometimes I just want to rip your clothes off and ravage you.”

“I like the sound of that.”

“I bet you do.” Therese leaned in for a slow kiss. “Do you think your parents will mind watching Rindy?”

“Are you kidding? My mother’s been practically dying for us to have sex. She’d watch Rindy for a whole month if that’s all we wanted to do. I have one condition.”

“What’s that?”

“You let me take you out to dinner.”

“Deal.”

* * *

Therese didn't think that she wasn’t going to make it through dinner. She drank more alcohol than she wanted to, but her nerves were getting the best of her. Wondering how Carol would react is what made her go for a third glass of wine.

“Are you all right?” Carol asked when she took Therese’s hand.

“A little nervous, I suppose.”

“So am I.”

“You?”

“Sweetheart, it’s been close to four years. Yes, I’m extremely nervous. Hopefully, I remember what to do.”

“I think you’ll be fine.”

Therese made it through dinner and tried to talk herself out of being with Carol. This was the most nervous she had been with anyone. Before she could talk herself out of it completely, she was back at Carol’s, making her way to the bedroom. Carol held onto her hand and led her to the bed. _Fuck, this is it. Don’t chicken out now._

When Carol took off her shirt, Therese took a deep breath; she’d never tire of seeing Carol’s gorgeous body. She bit her lip when Carol’s hands went to unhook her bra. This is it, this is the moment she’d been waiting for.

“Wait!” Therese held up her hand before Carol had a chance to continue. “Just wait a minute.” Therese shook her head and sat down on the bed.

“What’s wrong?” Carol asked and sat down next to her. “Sweetheart, are you okay?” Her hand was soothing on Therese’s back.

“I have to tell you something and … I don’t know how to and I don’t know what’s going to happen after I tell you.”

“You can tell me anything, darling.”

“It’s just not that simple.” Therese took a deep, calming breath and stood up. She needed to see Carol’s reaction when she told her.

“What is it?”

“Before I take off my clothes, you need to know what you’re going to see. More importantly, I need you to understand what you’re going to see.” Therese paced back and forth. “I’m sure you’ve noticed by now that I wear longer shorts and longer underwear.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“Well, they’re hiding a secret. I have … scars and once I take off my clothes, you’ll know what kind of scars they are. You’re a doctor, so you’ll know.” Therese fidgeted with her hands. “Fuck, this is so hard.”

“It’s okay, sweetheart. You can tell me.”

“I used to cut myself,” she blurted out. “The inside of my thighs, actually. It was easy to conceal there, easy to hide. My family didn’t know for a long time.” She was looking into Carol’s eyes, searching for anything, any reaction from her, but Carol only listened intently. “I was bullied in school. I guess I was an easy target since I liked girls. They called me names. It was awful. The way that I coped was to cut myself. So, after a few years of the bullying, I decided that maybe … the world was better off without me. I cut deep, deep enough to end it all and bleed out.”

“Oh, baby.” There were tears in Carol’s eyes.

“Adam was home from school and he found me. That’s one of the hardest things for me to deal with, actually. I wish I could take that back. When I woke up in the hospital, I felt … shame. Shame over hurting my family the way that I did. I don’t think they knew how badly I was bullied in school until then. Anyway, I was finally put on a medication that helped and went to therapy … a lot. I’m fine now, in case you’re wondering. But at the time, I just wanted it all to end; the pain, the bullying, feeling like an outcast. I wanted it all to go away. So, that’s it. That’s my secret.”

“I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry you went through that, sweetheart. But, you’re okay … now?”

“I am. I’m on medication and I go to therapy.”

“Well, that’s good that you got help.”

“Yeah, but I almost didn’t.”

“But you did. That’s what matters. Look, if you don’t want to do this …”

“My problem, Carol, is that I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to, with you. It’s not that I don’t want to. I’m scared that you’ll always wonder about me.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, because of what you went through with Jenna. I mean, I feel like you’ll always wonder if I’m going to do the same thing.”

“I can’t promise that I won’t. But I know that you’re not her and you’ve gotten help.”

“That’s it, though. I don’t want to put you in that situation. What you went through with Jenna was difficult, but if you have to worry about me, about getting a phone call, I can’t put you through that.”

“Sweetheart, I’m gonna worry about you regardless. I’m a mother, so I worry about everything and I love you. I’m always going to worry about you even if you didn’t just tell me all of that.”

“Carol, I just think that you’ll always be wondering about me because of the suicide attempt and I don’t want put you through that.”

“Darling, I appreciate you telling me. But you don’t have to worry about that. I’m fine and I can handle it,” she said, softly.

“I don’t know, Carol. I think it’s too much to handle. I kind of feel broken and I don’t want to pull you into my mess. It’s … it’s too much. I think I should just go.”

“No, wait. You don’t have to go.” Carol stood up to take Therese’s hand. “You can stay, we don’t have to do this, but you don’t have to leave.”

“No, I … I think I’ve wasted enough of your time, Carol. I think I should end this now.”

“What? Are you serious? We can talk this out and get past this.”

“I’m never going to get past it. You deserve better than someone like me. Someone who hasn’t scarred herself, someone who’s not crazy.”

“Therese …”

“No, Carol. I think this is best for you. I don’t know if I’ll ever be comfortable showing myself to you.”

“Therese, please don’t do this. Please don’t leave.”

“I’m sorry, I think I have to.” Therese had a hard time looking at Carol. She knew she was hurting her, but she knew that showing her body to her was something that she wasn’t sure that she’d ever be able to do. “I have to go. I’m sorry.”

Therese didn’t have to turn around to know that Carol was crying, she just knew she needed to leave. Letting Carol see her body was too difficult even with the alcohol. She may regret walking away from Carol, but putting her through the unnecessary worry was too painful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh!


	14. Chapter 14

Sleep was almost impossible for Carol that night. When she woke up the next morning after only a few hours of sleep, she tried to process what had happened the night before. How was it possible to go from being crazy in love with someone in one minute and in the next, that person walking out of your life?

Carol couldn’t care less if Therese’s body was covered in scars, she was crazy about her. Didn’t Therese know that? Didn’t Therese know that she was madly in love with her?

“Fuck,” Carol grumbled and got out of bed. “Goddammit,” she muttered when she looked in the mirror. “What did I do to make her think that I can’t handle being with her?”

She put on some clothes and walked the short distance to her parents’ house. Telling her mother what happened was sure to be difficult, but there would be no way around it; her mother was bound to find out at some point. She opened the door and found her mom and Rindy in the living room watching cartoons.

“Hey.”

“Mommy!” Rindy ran over to hug her mother. At least Rindy could make her feel a little better.

“Well, hello there,” Gloria said. “How was _your_ night? How’s Therese?” she asked with a smirk.

“Change of plans,” Carol replied and sat down next to her mother. “We broke up instead.”

“What? No way.”

“Yeah.”

“What happened?”

“I can’t really go into details because she has some … personal issues and she doesn’t think that I can handle it.”

“Oh. I’m sorry, baby.”

Carol laid her head on her mother’s shoulder. “Thanks.”

“Mom?” Rindy asked. “Does that mean I won’t see Therese anymore?” 

Rindy looked disappointed. How was she to explain to her daughter that she wouldn’t see Therese anymore? Or at least not as much anyway. Were they still friends? Would they hang out?

“I don’t know, sweetheart,” she answered honestly.

“Rindy, why don’t you go help your grandfather outside,” Gloria suggested. “Let me talk to your mom for a minute.”

“Are you okay?” Gloria asked when they were alone.

“No. I thought we really had something, you know? She’s different. But I can’t force her into something that she doesn’t want.”

What scared Carol most about losing Therese was the fact that it felt worse than when she lost Jenna. How was that possible? She had been with Jenna for fifteen years and only with Therese a short period of time. Maybe it was the fact that she learned just how short life was when she lost her wife. That lesson made her love harder and cherish every moment that she had with the ones that she loved.

“Do you think you’ll stay friends?”

“I don’t know, Mom. She just left last night and I don’t know what’s going to happen now. How am I supposed to be friends with her? It’s so confusing.”

“You still want her in your life, don’t you?”

“Yeah, I suppose.”

“Well then, be friends with her. She might change her mind one day.”

“I guess.” Carol shrugged.

“Baby, I’m so sorry. I hate to see you like this.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“I know you will. You’re strong as hell.”

* * *

Going back to work wasn’t as bad as Carol thought it would be. It was better than sulking all day. At least work kept her busy, but when things got slow, her mind wandered to Therese. She thought about texting or calling, but still hadn’t found enough courage to do either, even after three weeks. She wanted to keep Therese in her life, even if it was only as friends. That was something that she missed the most: their friendship. They were close and talked about everything. Now it seemed that she had no one to talk to.

“What are you so deep in thought about?” Nicole asked and Carol looked up from the chart in her hand.

“Oh. Nothing, just a lot going on, that’s all.”

“Here?” Nicole looked around. “It’s dead in here right now.”

“I don’t mean that.” Carol smiled and set the chart down. “Personal stuff.”

“Oh. Everything okay with Therese?”

“What do you mean?” Carol asked cautiously.

“I mean the two of you. Everything okay with you two?”

“How do you know about us?”

“Really? Every lesbian in this town knows every other lesbian’s business. And you’re the hottest lesbian around, so we all know about you and Therese.”

“Wait, are you gay?”

“You couldn’t tell?”

“I really didn’t know. So, everyone knows about me and Therese?”

“All the lesbians at least.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter anyway. We broke up.”

“No way!” Nicole exclaimed. “When?”

“I don’t know. A while ago.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Thanks. I’ll be in my office if you need anything.”

How many lesbians were there that knew about her and Therese? Couldn’t everyone just mind their own business? And how many of them had been with Therese? _Jesus, stop worrying about that._

When Carol got to her office, she wondered what Therese was doing. Would it be too much to just call her? Why did this have to be so hard? Three weeks … three _long_ weeks since they had last spoken to each other. She had seen her a few times when Therese would come and go during the day. Staring out of her window had become a pastime for Carol as she desperately tried to get a glimpse of Therese. The only thing that made her not feel like _total_ shit was the fact that Therese also looked as unhappy as Carol did. At least she wasn’t the only one in pain.

Carol decided that when she got off work that day, she was going to the lake house to spend some time alone. Rindy was at a friend’s house for the weekend, so Carol decided she was going to take advantage of it and get away. It was a better plan than staring out her window all weekend.

* * *

Therese knew that she had ruined the best thing that ever happened to her, but she was only trying to protect Carol. She knew that Carol had been doing that same thing that she was: sulking and staring out her window, hopeful for just one glance.

She saw Carol get home from work that night. Therese watched as the woman that she loved entered her own house, looking completely exhausted. She debated with herself many times over the last few weeks whether or not to text Carol or call. Ultimately, she never made a decision about both and the longer no contact continued, the worse she felt. Carol didn’t deserve being hurt the way that Therese hurt her, but she knew that she needed to end it before they progressed even farther in their relationship.

Therese continued to watch Carol’s house; the lights were on and she saw Carol move around every now and then. She wasn’t sure how long she had been standing at the window, but she saw Carol leave her house. All of her lights were turned off and Therese wondered where it was that she was going. _Could she be dating? No, that’s not possible, right?_

Therese stayed up late that night, wondering if Carol would return home. She kept an eye on Carol’s house, but at one-thirty, she knew that Carol wasn’t coming home.

Over the next few days, Therese kept an eye on the house. Every day that she didn’t see Carol felt like agony. Why did everything have to feel so awkward between them? Why couldn’t they just talk to each other like adults? She knew that Carol didn’t know how to approach the situation and she also didn’t know what to do or say.

She _did_ however, get a lot of writing done on her book, but she felt like such a hypocrite. How was she supposed to write a lesbian romance novel that ended with the two women being together when she couldn’t keep a relationship with the woman she loved? At least she could write under a different name and no one would know anything about her life.

Finally, she noticed that Carol showed up after three days. She wondered where Carol had been, what she had been doing and if she was alone while she was gone. Therese hated to feel as if she was spying on Carol, but curiosity was getting the best of her. She finally decided to text her; all of this waiting around for one person to break the silence was starting to drive her mad.

> Hey … -T

Therese waited for a response that she was sure she wouldn’t get. The message kept showing delivered and not read. She’d never stared so hard at her phone waiting for a message so long in her life. Her heart raced when she saw it change from delivered to read and she saw that Carol was typing.

> Hey -C

_Fuck, I really didn’t think this through. What the hell am I supposed to say?_

> How are you? -T
> 
> I’ve been better -C
> 
> Me too. I just wanted to apologize for walking out and not speaking to you for so long. I’m really sorry. I hope we can still be friends. If not, I understand. -T
> 
> I guess I understand why you left, but I would like to be friends. -C
> 
> You sure? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. -T
> 
> I’m sure. I miss you … -C
> 
> I miss you, too. I hope you’re doing okay. -T
> 
> I’m all right. Just trying to keep myself busy. -C
> 
> Me too. I’ve been writing a lot. -T
> 
> Oh yeah? Your book? -C
> 
> Yeah. -T
> 
> You never told me about your book … -C
> 
> It’s kind of embarrassing, I guess. -T
> 
> How so? -C
> 
> Umm … don’t laugh when I tell you. -T
> 
> Scout’s honor. -C
> 
> A lesbian romance book … -T
> 
> Really? Will you let me read it sometime? -C
> 
> You WANT to read a lesbian romance book? -T
> 
> It might surprise you to know that I read A LOT of lesbian romance books. ;) -C
> 
> No way! -T
> 
> Yes, way! -C
> 
> Well in that case, I might let you read it sometime. But it’s not finished yet. -T
> 
> That’s okay. I’ll be happy to read whatever you let me read. -C
> 
> Okay, well I guess I’ll send you what I have so far. Keep in mind that there are probably still mistakes since I haven’t proofread it yet. -T
> 
> I think I can live with a few mistakes … -C
> 
> Okay, I’ll send it. -T
> 
> Can’t wait! -C

Therese held her breath as she pushed the send button. No one that she knew had read what she had written so far and it was difficult to send it to Carol. She exhaled as she pressed the send button.

_Here goes nothing._

* * *

Carol opened the file that Therese had sent and quickly started reading. She wasn’t lying when she told Therese that she had read a lot of lesbian romance novels; it was a guilty pleasure of Carol’s. After Jenna died, she delved into the genre headfirst, unable to read enough books. 

She read what Therese had written so far and was hooked. Therese was an excellent storyteller and Carol wasn’t sure why she was so surprised by that; she knew she was an accomplished writer. She quickly called her to tell her how much she loved the book so far.

“Well?” Therese asked when she answered the phone.

“Oh my god. It is so good!”

“Yeah? You think so?”

“Therese, that’s one of the best books I’ve read so far. I can’t wait to read more.”

“Are you sure? I mean, I’m not completely crazy about it, but I guess that’s because I’ve read it so many times.”

“Yes, I’m sure. It’s incredible. I can’t wait for the rest.”

“I didn’t know that you were so in to lesbian romance books.”

“Well, I didn’t know that you were a lesbian romance author.”

“Touché.” When Therese laughed, Carol’s heart broke again. Would she really be able to be friends with her? Wouldn’t it be too difficult?

“It’s good to hear your voice.”

“Yeah, yours too.”

“I hope I’m not overstepping boundaries by telling you that I miss you.”

“Not at all. I miss you, too. I miss talking to you.”

_I miss talking to you, sleeping with you, waking up with you, kissing you …_ Carol wanted to tell her all of those things.

“I miss talking to you, too.”

“How’s Rindy?”

“She’s good. Staying at a friend’s house. She misses you. Asks about you all the time.”

“I miss her, too.”

“You’re welcome to come by sometime. She’d love to see you …” Carol stopped herself before sounding too desperate. _Fuck it._ “I’d love to see you. Not just through my window,” Carol said with a laugh.

“So you _have_ been spying on me, huh?” Therese asked, playfully.

“I think you’ve been doing the same thing to me.”

“Okay, okay. You’re right.”

“Don’t forget to send me more of that book when you write more.”

“I won’t.”

“And don’t be a stranger.”

“I won’t.”

“Okay, I should go. I need to pick up Rindy. You should bring Evan over sometime so they can play together.”

“Yeah, sure. I think he’d like that.”

After they said their goodbyes, Carol put on her shoes and went to her car. She looked over towards Therese’s house and waved when she saw her standing in front of her window. Finally, they were talking again and Carol felt elated, excited, and scared all at once. It was better than feeling completely devastated all the time. At least this was a step in the right direction for their friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not back together, but they're talking!


	15. Chapter 15

Carol was eating lunch by herself, in the cafeteria. The hospital food wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t great either. Usually she didn’t mind eating alone, but today she wouldn’t have minded the company. It was a busy day in the ER and she was hungry. She had caught up with most of her work and decided not to eat in her office. People watching was always exciting and there were all different kinds of people to watch in the cafeteria.

“Hey there. Mind if I join you?”

Carol looked up to see Nicole standing beside her.

“Not at all.”

“People watching?” she asked when she sat down at the table.

“Guilty.”

“I do the same thing here. You’d think we’d get bored with it, but I never do.”

“Neither do I.”

“So, what’s new? You and Therese speaking at all?”

“Yeah, finally. We’ve been spending time together. It’s nice.”

“You know, if you want, I can set you up with someone.”

“No,” Carol replied, laughing. “No fucking way. I’m not trying to date anyone.”

“Not even Therese?”

“Well, she’s the exception. I’m holding out to see if she’ll change her mind.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt.” Carol looked up to see the hospital administrator, Jean, standing next to her table. “Carol, we need to talk. Could you come with me?”

“Um, yeah. Sure.” Carol emptied her tray and followed Jean. “I’m sorry, did I do something wrong?”

“No, you didn’t.”

“So, what’s the problem?” Carol asked when they entered the elevator.

“I’d rather we discuss it in private.”

“But I’ve done nothing wrong? I’m confused.”

“I know, but just wait until we get to my office.”

Carol had no idea what the problem could have been. She was an excellent doctor, did everything by the book and never had a complaint against her. Would could have happened?

When they got to Jean’s office, she instructed Carol to take a seat. Whatever Jean had to tell her was obviously difficult. The waiting made it worse for Carol. 

“What is it, Jean? Just tell me. What did I do wrong?”

“You did nothing wrong. There’s been … an accident.”

“An accident? What’s wrong?”

“Carol, it’s Rindy.”

“What?” Carol checked her phone to see that she had some missed calls and a few texts. _Why the fuck didn’t I look at my phone sooner?_

“She was at a friend’s house, right?”

“Yeah. Tell me what happened,” Carol demanded.

“She fell from a horse. Apparently, they tried to call you, but knew you were working, so somehow they got a hold of me. It just happened, Carol. She’s in an ambulance on her way here. Dr. Clark is in the ER right now. He’s going to take over.”

“How bad is it?” Carol managed to ask.

“Well … it’s not good. That’s all I know right now.”

Carol felt helpless, sitting in an office while her daughter was in an ambulance, on the way to the hospital with injuries that Carol knew nothing about. Rindy had ridden horses many times at her friend’s house and Carol never had a problem with it, never questioned it. 

“Fuck,” Carol muttered. She looked down at her phone and returned the phone call that she missed from Rindy’s friend’s mother.

“Hello?” Lindsay sounded stressed when she answered the phone.

“Lindsay?”

“Oh my god, Carol, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what happened with the horse. It threw her off. Oh god, Carol …” Lindsay started weeping. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“Accidents happen, Lindsay. It’s not your fault.”

“I’m following the ambulance right now. She’s almost at the hospital.”

Carol hung up and looked at Jean. She felt completely helpless. There was nothing that she could do to help Rindy, ethically anyway. She knew she had to stand back and let the staff do their job. 

“Carol … you know that I can’t let you …”

“I know,” Carol interrupted. “I know.”

“Garrett’s the next best doctor that we have.”

“I know, Jean.”

“We’re going to do everything we can for her. I promise we’ll do everything that we can.”

“Thank you. Jean, I need to see her when she comes in, though. If I don’t …”

“I’ll be there with you.”

Carol went down to the ER and waited at the nurses station. The entire situation felt surreal. Everything in the ER was calm for what had previously been such a busy day. Now, it was just her and a few nurses sitting quietly. They worked while she sat there, waiting. Clearly they knew the situation; Carol was sure that they had already been told what happened. Dr. Clark sat down next to Carol while she watched the door. 

“I’m going to do everything I can for her, Carol,” he said, softly.

“Thanks.” What else was she supposed to say? The only thing that she wanted was to see her daughter. “Do you know how bad it is?”

“The only thing I know right now is that she hit her head and is unconscious.”

“Okay.”

“I’m sorry, that’s all I know …”

Before he could finish, the ER doors came flying open and Carol’s heart stopped. Her worst nightmare was coming true: that tiny little body on the stretcher was her daughter. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion: the paramedics wheeling the stretcher to a room, Garrett running after them and two nurses following. Carol felt helpless as she watched it happen. She took a deep breath and slowly made her way to the room.

Carol felt an arm around her shoulders and looked to see Jean standing beside her. Rindy looked limp, but still had color and Carol knew that was a good sign. She couldn’t do anything but watch and it made her feel ill. She went back to the nurses station and pulled out her phone to call her mother.

“Hey, care bear.”

“Mom.” Carol’s voice was shaky.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Rindy. Um … she was in an accident. She fell from a horse at her friend’s house.”

“Oh my god, baby. Is she okay?”

“I don’t really know. She hit her head and she’s unconscious right now. That’s all I know. The ambulance just showed up not too long ago.”

“Your father and I are on the way.”

“You don’t have to, Mom.”

“Nonsense. We’ll be there.”

Carol sat down and waited for anyone to exit Rindy’s room. She couldn’t watch as they worked - it was too painful. Finally, Dr. Clark approached her.

“I think she’s going to be fine, Carol. She hit her head pretty hard and I’m ordering a scan and x-rays. I want to make sure that there’s nothing broken, but I think she’ll be all right.”

She trusted his opinion – he was one of the best doctors around. Carol felt some relief, but until the results of the scan came back and Rindy was awake, she couldn’t feel completely satisfied.

“Can I see her? Please?”

“Yeah, you can see her before we send her up. But try not to be too long. I don’t want to wait.”

“No, I understand. I just need to see her for a minute.”

Carol went to Rindy’s room and stood next to her. She seemed so tiny on such a big bed. Taking care of children was always the hardest for Carol when they came into the ER. The good thing about children is that they recovered a lot quicker than adults, so that was something to look forward to. 

She knelt down beside the bed and took Rindy’s hand in hers. She gently kissed the back of the small hand in hers.

“Baby, I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I love you so much, sweetheart. Mommy’s right here and everything’s going to be okay.”

“Carol,” Dr. Clark whispered from the doorway. “We have to take her.”

“Okay.” 

Carol gently kissed Rindy’s forehead and let the nurses take her. She went to the waiting room to wait for her parents. How was she supposed to just sit and wait for her daughter to wake up? How bad were Rindy’s injuries? Did she have brain damage? Carol couldn’t stop her mind from racing.

She was almost to the point where she was coming to terms with Therese breaking up with her. Trying to get over that pain was difficult, but now she had to deal with the fact that her daughter was unconscious and in the hospital. Carol was starting to feel that a black cloud had set up shop right over her head.

Before Carol’s parents arrived, Lindsay came running through the ER doors. Carol knew that she felt awful and she tried to calm her. It wasn’t Lindsay’s fault – accidents happen all the time. Carol wasn’t angry and had reassured her that everything would be okay. 

Carol’s parents showed up while she was explaining what was currently happening with Rindy. They all sat down and waited for the doctor. Carol laid down and placed her head in Gloria’s lap. Her mother had an excellent way of calming her when she felt anxious. 

“Have you called Therese?” Gloria asked.

“No. Should I?”

“I think she’d want to know. It would help you to have a friend right now.”

“I have you and Dad.”

“Yeah, but I’m sure she’d be some comfort to you right now.”

“I don’t want to bother her.”

“I doubt that you’re a bother to her.”

“Maybe I’ll call her later. I just need to find out what’s going on with Rindy before I do anything.”

They all sat patiently waiting for any news. It was an hour until the doctor came back to tell Carol that Rindy had a concussion, but besides that, everything else looked okay. Carol still felt little relief; she wanted her daughter to be awake and to go home with her. Keeping Rindy in the hospital would be more than difficult, but she knew that it was the best thing for her.

“Is she awake yet?” Carol asked, afraid of the answer.

“Not yet,” Dr. Clark replied after a sigh. “But that’s not necessarily a bad thing.”

“I guess.”

“Can we see her?” Bruce asked.

“It would be best if she rested right now.”

“Why don’t the two of you go home?” Carol suggested to her parents. “It’ll probably be a while until we can see her anyway.” She didn’t want them sitting around at the hospital, stressing about Rindy or herself.

“Carol, we can stay,” Gloria replied. “It’s not a problem.”

“Mom, it’s fine. You heard him, she’ll be okay. It’s not good for you both to be under this stress here.”

“You’ll be doing the same thing, Carol.”

“I know, but I’m going to go to my office. I’ll call if something happens.”

Lindsay apologized again and Carol told reassured her again. She told her that she’d call if anything changed and walked all of them out of the hospital. 

Carol had been in her office for an hour when Jean came in and tried to talk her into going home. It was a lost cause because the only way that Carol was leaving the hospital was if security carried her out. She had no intention of leaving until Rindy woke up.

She laid on her couch in her office to try to get some sleep, but was sure it would be impossible. At some point, she _did_ fall asleep because she felt someone trying to wake her up.

“Carol?” she heard Therese whispering.

“Hey,” she said when she opened her eyes. “What are you doing here?”

“Your mom told me what happened. I wanted to come by and see if you’re okay.”

“Oh.” Carol rubbed her eyes and sat up. She reached for her phone to see if there was any word on Rindy … nothing yet.

“Are you okay?” Therese sat down next to her. “I guess that was a stupid question.”

“I’m okay, I guess. Worried.”

“I can’t even imagine. How’s Rindy?”

“Unconscious right now. As far as I know, anyway. I haven’t heard anything. I know they don’t want anyone to see her right now. It’s good, I guess. She needs her rest.”

“But everything came back okay, right?”

“Yeah, she’s going to be all right. But until she’s awake, I won’t feel okay about it.”

“You know I’m here for whatever you need.”

“Thanks.”

“I brought you a change of clothes. I didn’t know if you had anything else to wear.” Therese handed her a bag.

“Oh, thank you. That was … thoughtful. Look, you don’t have to be here. I know no one wants to be at a hospital if they don’t have to.”

“What else am I going to do? Sit at home and worry? I’d rather be here with you.”

“I just wish that I could see her.”

“Have you seen her at all?”

“For a few minutes when they first brought her in. Ethically, there’s nothing that I’m allowed to do since she’s my daughter.”

“Well, I’ll wait with you. Why don’t you try to go back to sleep?” Therese patted her lap for Carol to lay her head down.

“You don’t have to do this, you know?”

“I know, but what kind of friend would I be if I didn’t? I’m here for you and Rindy.”

Carol gave in and laid her head on Therese’s lap. It was comforting to have her there, to feel her hands in her hair, to lull her to sleep. There was nothing to do but wait …

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no, poor Rindy! Do you think this will bring Carol and Therese closer?


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter helps make up for the last one.

Therese was finally able to convince Carol to go home for a bit, if only to shower and possibly sleep in her own bed instead of the couch in her office. While it was a comfortable couch, it certainly wasn’t suitable for sleeping. Carol was obviously under a lot of stress and Therese couldn’t blame her for falling asleep in her office. Rindy was still unconscious, but stable and would eventually wake up. But the waiting was tearing Carol apart and Therese felt completely helpless.

Therese followed Carol into her house and waited in her bedroom - at Carol’s request - while she showered. Carol clearly didn’t want to be alone and Therese had no desire to leave her right now. Not while she was stuck in this limbo. 

She picked up one of Carol’s pillows - the one that she knew Carol slept on. It smelled of Carol; her perfume and her natural scent. It hit her hard between the legs; she ached for Carol. She didn’t want to feel that way, but she couldn’t control what her body naturally did when it came to Carol. 

They were friends, but there was an awkwardness between them that Therese couldn’t stand. The only reason that she broke it off with Carol was because she didn’t want to worry her and if she knew that she was the cause of Carol’s worry, Therese wouldn’t be able to deal with it. Only now, Therese was beginning to rethink her decision. Had she made the biggest mistake of her life? Probably, but now wasn’t the time to discuss it with Carol. Therese made the decision that once Rindy was awake and feeling much better, she’d have a serious discussion with her about her feelings and hope that Carol would take her back.

She heard the shower turn off and quickly placed the pillow back where it was. Sitting on Carol’s bed brought back so many memories of falling asleep with her, waking up to her, watching her sleep peacefully.

“Hey,” she heard Carol say when she exited her bathroom. Carol still looked stunning even while Therese knew that she was struggling. How could one person possibly look so perfect while in so much pain?

“How was the shower?”

“I must say that it felt pretty good.”

“How are you feeling?” _God, what a stupid fucking question._

“I’m trying to stay hopeful, but until she wakes up, it’s difficult to do that.”

Therese patted the bed next to her and Carol sunk down beside her, letting her head fall on Therese’s shoulder. She could smell the coconut scent of Carol’s shampoo and it made her smile. Her arm instinctively wrapped around Carol’s shoulders. When Carol’s hand reached for her thigh, Therese didn’t push her away, but Carol was quick to remove it. She was sure that Carol forgot for a moment about the way that she had swatted her hand away that day. 

“It’s okay.” Therese took Carol’s hand and placed it back on her leg.

“No, I’m sorry. My head’s not in the right place and I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

“Really, it’s fine.” And it was. Therese was positive about that; it was more than okay for Carol to touch her. In that moment, she knew that she’d give herself over to Carol when the time came. She wasn’t going to push her away again if she had the chance. She’d let Carol see her and touch her, but right now wasn’t the time.

Carol’s hand rested on her thigh with her own hand on top. They were silent for a long time, while Therese only held her. Words would only ruin the tender moment they were sharing. There was an understanding between the two of them. An understanding that didn’t need to be vocalized because she was sure that Carol knew exactly what she was thinking.

“Please don’t leave me tonight,” Carol softly begged.

“I won’t,” Therese promised. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

All the previous awkwardness between them left right then and all that was left was the glaringly obvious love they shared for each other. Therese knew that she and Carol were far from over and this was just the beginning for them.

“You should try to sleep. It’ll be easier in your bed. I’ll sleep on the couch,” she said softly, wanting to give Carol her own space. While it seemed that their relationship was sure to rekindle, Therese didn’t want to make it seem that she was taking advantage of a horrible situation.

“Please don’t.” Carol moved her hand to Therese’s hip and pulled her closer. “Sleep with me. Please?”

“Are you sure?” She knew that Carol was vulnerable.

“Yes. I need you. I just need you to hold me.” The pleading tone in Carol’s voice made Therese’s heart ache.

“Okay, but I need to get some clothes from home real quick.”

“You have clothes here,” Carol said cautiously as she climbed under the blanket. “In your drawer. Your toothbrush is in my bathroom as well.”

“All right. I’ll be right back.”

Therese went to the drawer that Carol had cleared for her a while back and grabbed her clothes. She smiled when she saw them neatly folded - it was just like Carol to keep everything neat in Therese’s drawer. When she went to Carol’s bathroom to change, she didn’t even bother to shut the door like she normally did. It no longer bothered her what she looked like and if Carol saw. She also had nothing long enough to wear that covered the fading scars on her legs and she didn’t care anymore; Carol was going to see her eventually anyway.

She brushed her teeth and met Carol in bed. She no longer felt any shame about her body and it was the most freeing feeling she had experienced in a long time. Carol instinctively pulled Therese toward her - a move that felt so natural to the both of them.

“Tonight, I hold you,” Therese whispered.

“I like the sound of that.”

“You think you’ll be able to sleep?”

“I always sleep better with you.”

* * *

Carol felt someone nudging her awake. For a moment she forgot that Therese was beside her and that Rindy was still in the hospital. Then reality set in what had happened. For a split second, everything seemed right with the world.

“Carol,” Therese whispered. “Your phone’s vibrating.”

She looked at her phone and quickly sat up while she answered it; the hospital. Something was happening with Rindy or else they wouldn’t have called. It was Garrett on the other end. He had been there all night, even after finishing Carol’s shift, but she trusted him completely with Rindy. She felt so grateful for him.

“Is everything okay?” she asked.

“Everything is fine, Carol,” he said, clearly smiling. She knew how wonderful it felt to give good news and there so rarely was good news to give when being a doctor. “She just woke up. She’s a bit groggy, but she’s awake.”

“Oh my god, thank you for calling me.”

“Of course I was going to call you.”

“I’ll get there when I can.”

“No rush, she’s fine Carol.”

“Thank you, Garrett. For everything.”

“For you, it’s not a problem at all.”

Carol hung up and looked at her phone: 5:13. It was still dark and she turned to vaguely make out the worried look on Therese’s face.

“Well?” Therese asked.

“She’s awake and she’s fine.” 

Carol felt relief wash over her and was suddenly racked with sobs; it was all too much, but she wasn’t completely sure why she was crying. Therese wrapped her arms around her and everything about it felt so right, but she wasn’t going to push her into anything that she didn’t want. She’d let Therese come to her if that’s what she wanted, but it felt wonderful to be in her arms. Not just now, but all night long. Maybe she was crying because she felt relief? Happiness? Sadness? Or maybe it was all three. Either way, her daughter was going to be fine and Therese was with her right now.

“I’m so sorry,” she managed to say when she could finally catch her breath.

“Don’t you dare apologize. It’s understandable, how you feel.”

Carol let Therese comfort her and Carol thought back to earlier whenever Therese climbed in bed with her. It didn’t go unnoticed that she didn’t even try to cover her legs. Was she trying to send a message to Carol? That she was finally ready for her? That was something that Carol would need to think about later. Right now, she needed to get to the hospital to see Rindy. For Carol, it wasn’t enough that her daughter was awake, but she needed to _see_ Rindy for herself. 

“Thank you, Therese. For being here for me. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.”

“I’m always here for you. Always and don’t ever forget that.”

Somehow Carol ended up sitting between Therese’s legs. She didn’t notice it earlier that Therese had sat behind her, wrapping herself around Carol. A small smile played on Carol’s lips. Therese wouldn’t be able to see her smile, but with Therese draped around her, she felt relaxed and happy.

“I should probably get ready and head to the hospital. I need to see her. You don’t have to go with me. You’ve already done enough for me and I’m so grateful for that.”

“Are you kidding? I’m going with you. I need to see her as well.”

It hadn’t even dawned on Carol that Therese was worried about Rindy as well. Her mind had been so all over the place that she wasn’t surprised that that hadn’t occurred to her. Of course Therese wanted to see Rindy; the two of them were extremely close. She was also sure that Rindy would want to see Therese.

“Of course you do. My brain …”

“I understand, Carol. No need to explain. Come on, let’s get dressed.”

Carol reached over and turned on the light. When she stood up and went to her closet, she looked over at Therese, who was standing in only her underwear and t-shirt. That was odd, she always slept in shorts and had come to bed in shorts. Therese must have noticed the odd look on Carol’s face and looked down at her sleep attire.

“This is how I normally sleep.” Therese shrugged. “The shorts got on my nerves last night.”

“I like it.” That was an understatement; Carol loved it. Therese had gorgeous legs and as much as she tried to suppress it, thoughts of those legs wrapped around her head came creeping in. What she wouldn’t give to be naked with that woman. 

It didn’t take long to get to the hospital and to Rindy’s room. The little girl was beyond excited to see her mother and Therese. She even asked about Evan and Therese told her that once she felt better, they would be able to play together. 

Finally, Carol felt relief and sat down in the chair next to Rindy’s bed. She wasn’t sure when she fell asleep, but when she woke up, her parents were there. It completely slipped her mind to call them.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry I didn’t call,” she said while rubbing her eyes.

“Don’t worry about it, I saw you leave this morning and Therese called to tell us what was happening.”

“Oh Mom, I’m sorry.”

“Sweetheart, don’t worry about it.” Gloria sat down next to her daughter while Bruce chatted up Therese and Rindy. “Besides,” she lowered her voice. “I saw that Therese had spent the night. I’m sure your mind was really not in the right place.”

Carol couldn’t help the grin that spread across her face. “Mom, nothing’s happening.”

“Sure. That’s the grin of nothing happening.”

“Okay, maybe,” Carol whispered. “I don’t know, but it feels a little different. Like maybe there’s a chance that we could be together. I’m not going to push her, though. But,” Carol said with a blush creeping on her cheeks. “We _did_ sleep together. Nothing happened, but it felt really good to have her in my bed again.”

“Do you want me to talk to her?”

“No, no, no. It’s fine. I really think she’ll come around eventually. She needs a little time, but she’s off to a pretty good start.” Carol smiled when she thought about Therese in her underwear.

“I don’t know what that means, but I hope this works out for the both of you.”

“Thanks, Mom. Me too.”

And Carol suddenly became extremely hopeful that it would.


	17. Chapter 17

It had been a few weeks since Rindy had been released from the hospital. Therese was happy that she was doing well. She had been spending more time than usual with Carol and Rindy. When Carol had to work and Therese could, she’d babysit. Therese enjoyed it since she didn’t always have Evan and it felt good to have a child to care for. She always loved being a mother.

For weeks, Therese had gone over how to talk to Carol about getting back together. She was sure that it was something that they both wanted. The longing stares, the lingering touches, the pecks on the cheeks that seemed to last longer than “just friends”. There was a chemistry between them that neither one could deny. 

Therese went to her closet and looked through her dresses. She wanted to look her best tonight. She picked one of her flowing, flowery dresses that she knew Carol loved on her. With as much confidence that she could muster, she looked at herself in the mirror and tried to see herself through Carol’s eyes. It didn’t work; she still didn’t see herself the way that Carol did, but she knew that when she looked like she did right then that it worked for Carol. Therese’s makeup was subtle, but she went for lipstick tonight - she almost never wore it, but she was going to look her best.

When she opened her refrigerator, she picked up the bottle that she had chosen for tonight. It wasn’t cheap wine, but she wanted it to be a special night. It was finally time to tell Carol that she needed her back and that she had made a terrible mistake. Easy, right? _Yeah, right._

She made the short walk to Carol’s house. When she rang the doorbell, she took a deep breath and waited. When the door opened, Carol was standing in the most incredible red dress that Therese had ever seen on her, or anyone for that matter. The dress itself wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, but the color contrasted perfectly with her alabaster skin. She was putting on an earring and Therese stood dumbfounded. She opened her mouth to speak, but why was she standing at Carol’s door? She couldn’t remember why or even how she got there.

“Therese?”

She looked up at Carol and was entranced by the vision in front of her. Then it hit her that Carol was obviously dressed up for a reason. A date? _Oh my god, she has a date. Fuck._ She shook her head, trying to clear it.

“Wow. You look incredible.”

“Thanks. I could say the same about you.” Carol grinned and motioned for Therese to come in.

“I’m sorry. I should have called. It looks like you have a date.” Therese couldn’t help but sound completely deflated. She knew that she had waited too long to tell Carol how she felt about her. 

“Oh no …” Carol brought her hands up to Therese’s arms. “Well, kind of, I guess. I have this fundraiser for the hospital to go to. My date is Dad. Everyone always asks about him since he retired from there and I thought it would be good to take him. I completely forgot about it since everything that was going on with Rindy. I’m sorry I forgot to tell you.”

“Oh, that’s fine.” Therese felt relieved that she didn’t completely blow it with Carol.

“But I _do_ have a question.”

“Yes?”

“Why are you dressed up with this insanely good bottle of wine?” Carol took the bottle and eyed it. “Impressive.”

“Oh, I just … um … ” Therese was unable to finish her thought since Gloria showed up from the kitchen.

“Therese!” She quickly hugged Gloria and offered a smile, grateful to be interrupted. 

“Hello.”

“Well, don’t you look gorgeous.” Gloria looked her up and down.

“That’s what I was just saying, Mom. I was wondering why she was so dressed up with a bottle of wine.”

They both looked at her expectedly and she mentally floundered everything that she had prepared to say to Carol. She didn’t exactly want to say it in front of Gloria either. 

“Carolyn,” Bruce called for his daughter, saving Therese once again. Therese never told Carol that Bruce was the doctor that took care of her after she tried to kill herself. “Are you ready?” he asked as he approached. He stood next to Carol and she could easily see the resemblance between father and daughter. Not only were they same height, but they both had the same distinct features. Gloria was a beautiful woman in her own right, but Carol got her genes from her dad. Therese was sure that in his youth, he was an extremely handsome man.

“I am. Dad, I’ll be out in a minute.”

“All right, sweet pea,” he said and winked at Therese when he passed her. Gloria took the hint and went to get Rindy.

“Is everything all right?” she asked Therese when they were alone.

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I didn’t know that you wouldn’t be alone or else I wouldn’t have picked tonight to come over. It’s fine. We can talk later.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” Therese smiled and for the first time that night, was jealous of Bruce Ross. “Have fun tonight.” She desperately wanted to be the one on Carol’s arm tonight.

“I’ll try.” 

She pecked Therese on the cheek and called for Gloria to tell her she was leaving. They said their goodbyes and Therese stood in the doorway watching them leave.

“You know she wanted to take you,” Gloria said after they drove off.

Therese looked at her as if she was speaking a foreign language. What was it that she just said?

“What?”

“You. She wanted to take you tonight, but she was afraid that it would be too much pressure for you since it would kind of be a date. She really went back and forth about whether or not to ask you.”

“I would have said yes.” Her voice sounded so small and she almost felt guilty for Carol worrying about her feelings so much.

“That’s what I told her.” Gloria grinned and pulled Therese inside. “So, why don’t you tell me why you’re over here, looking gorgeous and carrying wine?”

“Okay, okay.” Therese held up her hands in defeat. “I came over tonight to tell Carol that I messed up and that I want to be with her.”

“Now, _that’s_ what I like to hear. I told Carol that you’d change your mind one day.”

“I made a huge mistake when I broke up with her, but that’s not going to happen again. I need her. I need to be with her and I’m pretty sure that she feels the same way.”

“She does. Hey, I have an idea. Why don’t we go to that fundraiser?”

“What about Rindy?”

“We’ll take her with.”

“But won’t she be sleepy?”

“Are you trying some sort of stall tactic?”

“Maybe.” Therese blushed.

“Just tell her how you feel. That’s all you have to do.”

“You make it sound so easy.”

“It is when you love someone. And besides that, I don’t know if I’m okay with these hospital bitches talking up my gorgeous husband.”

Therese burst into laughter - she’d never heard Gloria so jealous. It also warmed her heart that she was still so passionate about him after all the years they’d spent together. She hoped that she and Carol would have that one day. Somehow, she knew that they would.

“Well, I can hardly argue with a possessive woman.”

When they showed up with Rindy in tow, Therese was starting to feel extremely nervous. Her palms were sweating and her heart was racing. She wasn’t quite sure why she was so nervous; she already knew how Carol felt about her. 

Rindy spotted Bruce and ran for her grandfather. He looked perplexed and then looked over to Gloria and Therese. The way that he looked at Gloria reminded Therese so much of the way that Carol looked at her. She knew that look - that was the look of someone in love. 

“You didn’t have anything to worry about with the way that he’s looking at you, you know. He’s crazy about you,” Therese said to Gloria.

“I know, I just like to see him look at me that way when I surprise him.” Gloria turned to Therese and smiled. “She looks at you the same way, you know.”

“I know and they look so much alike that it really is the same look that Carol gives me.”

“Don’t you love it? That look?” Gloria looked back at her husband and smiled. She was still crazy about him as well.

“Yeah, I do,” Therese confessed.

She scanned the room for Carol, searching for that bright red dress. Finally, she saw her with a glass of champagne in her hand, her arm across her body, propping up her elbow and deep in conversation with someone that Therese didn’t know. Carol wore her hair down that night and it fell in loose waves around her face. What she wouldn’t give to be smothered in that hair. Carol kept complaining about how long it was getting and how badly she needed to get it cut, but Therese loved it.

Finally, their eyes met and there it was: that look. The look that made Therese weak. Everything else drowned out around her; noise, people, light. There was only Carol and her. She watched as Carol excused herself and made her way over to Therese.

“Twice in one night. To what do I owe this wonderful pleasure?” Carol’s eyes sparkled when she spoke, making Therese a puddle of goo inside. 

“We decided to show up,” Gloria said. “Rindy’s with your father.” She nodded in their direction.

“Mom? I didn’t even see you.”

“I’m not surprised.” Gloria gave them a wink and left them alone.

“We got bored at the house.” Therese shrugged and struggled to look in Carol’s eyes. “Well, that’s not entirely true, I guess. Um, I was hoping we could talk?”

“Follow me.” Carol led them outside where it was quieter. “What is it that you want to talk about?” She sipped her champagne and Therese suddenly wished that she had a glass for this.

“Um, well, tonight when I came over. I wanted to talk about … us.”

“What about us?”

Therese inched closer to Carol and ran a fingertip over her forearm. God, Carol’s toned muscles were ridiculously sexy. She swallowed hard and looked up at Carol.

“I miss you,” she said softly. “I fucked up, Carol. I never should have walked away from you. I’ve been regretting it every day since. I’d like to try again … that is, if you want.”

“Yes,” Carol said without hesitation.

“Really? You don’t need to think about it?”

“No.” Carol shook her head. “Not at all.” She moved her hand to Therese’s waist and pulled her close. “I’m fucking crazy about you and I’ve never felt this way about _anyone_.” Carol leaned in and placed a soft kiss on Therese’s lips. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long.”

Therese could only smile, too happy to think about anything else. She wrapped her arms around Carol’s waist and held on. 

“I hope I’m not being too presumptuous when I ask when we can be alone,” Therese said with a nervousness creeping into her voice.

“Not soon enough,” Carol replied, laughing. “But I want you alone. All alone, no distractions.”

“I like that idea.”

“You want to go up to the lake house with me? I’m sure my mom would be thrilled to keep Rindy for a while.”

“Absolutely. When did you have in mind?”

“If I had it my way, we’d already be up there. Tomorrow? Are you free for a few days?”

“A few? You must have something planned?”

“When I get you naked, I’m not going to want to do anything for a while, but you.”

Therese felt warmth spread through her body and pool between her legs. She was beyond ready to be alone with Carol. If Carol would have suggested a whole month alone, she would have found a way to make it happen. The way that she ached for Carol made her crazy. They both desperately needed to be with one another. The sexual tension between the two of them had been building for so long that Therese thought she may combust on the spot.

“Fuck, Carol,” she breathed out.

“The next time you say that,” Carol whispered into her ear. “Hopefully, you’ll be screaming those words.”

Yep, that’s what it took to make Therese’s clit throb so hard it was almost painful. _Almost._

“You just might be the end of me, you know.”

“I doubt that, but I _do_ plan on wearing you out over the next few days. I hope you can handle it.”

“Oh, I can. I’m more than ready to be with you.” Therese could hardly wait to get Carol alone. She knew their first time would be gentle, soft, and tender, but Therese was certainly no wilting flower and she could be one to surprise a lover. “I just hope that you’ll be able to handle me.”

“Oh, now _this_ could be interesting.”

“You have no idea,” Therese said, smirking.

“Well then, I’ll mentally prepare for whatever it is that you have planned, my love.”

Therese looked up at Carol, always surprised that a look could convey how much that woman loved her.

“I love you, Carol.”

“I love you too, baby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Looks like we have something steamy to look forward to!!!
> 
> Who’s excited?!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, here we go! The chapter you've all been waiting for ... patiently. Let me also say that I didn't think that I'd be able to write so many chapters without smut. But now that it's here, I hope that I don't disappoint! 
> 
> Enjoy!

Carol drove to the lake house with Therese’s hand on her thigh. Both of them were beyond giddy as if they were teenagers. Carol’s nerves were starting to set in when she thought about how long it had been since she had let another person see her body. All of that would change today and that made her think about the last time that she’d had sex. 

It was with Jenna and it wasn’t long before she had died. Carol had been hesitant to have sex after she had Rindy. Her body had changed and she no longer felt sexy. Jenna had reassured her that she loved her no matter what her body looked like, that she was still the most beautiful woman that she’d ever seen. It still did little to quell Carol’s insecurities. It was one thing to touch herself, but to let her wife see her was difficult. They had only had sex a handful of times after Rindy came along and the very last time they did was memorable. Carol finally felt free enough to let Jenna see her. Had she known that it would be the last time, Carol would have tried to remember every single detail.

Now, here she was, a little over four years later and finally going to let a woman see her again. And not just any woman either, the one woman that drove Carol mad with lust. She wasn’t sure if it was the constant denial that they put each other through or what it was, but Carol was more than ready to feel Therese against her, without anything hindering their skin from touching.

She looked over at Therese when she put the car in park and smiled at the grin on her face. Her heart thundered in her chest from the anticipation. Carol would have loved to strip her naked right then and there and have her in the front seat of her car. Somehow she knew that Therese wouldn’t refuse her, but she wanted it to be special. They were both clearly anxious to get the first time over with, but Carol planned on making a marathon out of it and she was sure that Therese wanted the same thing.

“Finally here.” Carol leaned over and kissed her softly.

“Finally,” Therese replied. “Now I can have a drink!”

“Oh, you need alcohol to be with me, huh?” she asked playfully, but stopped Therese from speaking with a kiss. “I’m only joking. Besides, I could use a drink, too.”

Therese helped Carol unload the car and when they finally took everything inside, they opened a bottle of wine. The alcohol was sure to take the edge off for Carol.

“Are you nervous?” Therese asked.

“A little, yeah. It’s been a while. Are you?”

“Of course! I mean, I’m about to be naked with a woman that I’ve had a crush on for almost my entire life. I’ve fantasized about this for a _long_ time.”

“So, no pressure then, right?” Carol smirked.

“Absolutely none,” Therese replied. “I highly doubt that you could ever disappoint me.”

“I hope I don’t.”

“You won’t. I know it.” Therese pulled Carol close for a kiss.

“So, how would you like to spend this day?”

“Honestly, I’d love to be in bed with you, but if you want to wait until later, I don’t mind.”

“Maybe we should wait? I don’t know, I haven’t had this opportunity in a long time. What do you think?”

“I think we’ve waited long enough. It’s not like we don’t know what’s going to happen. We came up here to be alone and I’m more than ready to be with you. Besides,” Therese said as she moved her hand under Carol’s tank top, “we can always work up an appetite and then cook together.”

Carol found it hard to focus when Therese’s hand moved higher and cupped her left breast. Carol’s nipple instantly hardened and she felt her pussy start to flood with the thought of Therese naked against her. “I like your ideas.”

“Come on.” 

Therese took Carol’s hand and led her to the bedroom. Carol eagerly followed. Finally, she’d be with this woman that she’d been pleasuring herself to for months. Her body felt alive again; a spark that she hadn’t felt in years and the way that Therese was looking at her only fueled the fire inside her. She burned for this woman standing in front of her, especially since Therese’s eyes were dark with lust. 

Finally, Carol wasn’t overthinking this. She previously thought about waiting until that night, but she knew that Therese was right and they had been waiting far too long for this. It didn’t matter what time of day their first time would be or where it was, it was going to be special no matter what. The setting wasn’t important, Therese was. 

She watched as Therese undressed, anxiously waiting to touch her. There was an understanding that this was important to Therese: showing herself to Carol. She wasn’t ashamed to undress and Carol watched in awe, proud of how far she’d come. When she finally took off her underwear and stood naked in the bright light of day, Carol looked her up and down.

“You’re beautiful,” Carol whispered. She no longer felt anxious or nervous. All of that had faded away and she was thrilled to feel this woman against her.

Therese stepped closer and pulled Carol towards her by the hips. “Would you mind if I undressed you?”

“Not at all.”

Therese was deliberately slow in removing Carol’s clothes. Her senses were completely heightened by the time she was completely naked. Therese’s fingertips roamed her skin and Carol felt it everywhere. Therese’s eyes fell to Carol’s chest. 

“You _do_ have a scar.”

“I told you I did.”

“I like it.” Therese ran her finger over the scar on Carol’s breast and she felt her clit throbbing harder than it had in a long time.

“Therese … please.”

“Lie down,” she said softly.

Carol did as she was told and watched as Therese climbed on top of her. Her leg fell in between Carol’s and she felt the wetness from Therese’s pussy on her thigh. She knew that this wouldn’t be the last time that she would feel this woman gushing for her. 

Therese’s thigh pushed against her soaked pussy and she leaned down to kiss Carol deeply. Her hand moved to Carol’s breast and she pinched her nipple. Carol moaned into Therese’s mouth. She was sure that it wouldn’t be long until she came undone.

“Jesus, Therese,” she said when she pulled away.

“I can’t believe I do this to you.”

“It’s not going to be long until I come.”

“I can tell. You’re pretty wet.”

“So are you.” Carol smirked.

“I’m always wet for you.”

“Fuck,” she whispered.

“Tell me what you want. I’ll do anything.”

“Anything?” Carol’s eyebrows shot up.

“Anything.”

“Hmmm, I could use that to my advantage,” Carol replied. “I might take you up on that offer one day.”

“I hope you do.”

“Right now, I only want your mouth on me. Use your mouth to make me come.”

Therese leaned down for a soft kiss. “I’ve been dying to taste you.” Oh, this woman was going to be her undoing.

When Therese sucked a nipple into her mouth, Carol felt it on her clit. She tangled her fingers in Therese’s hair and forgot how wonderful it was to have a woman do this to her again, to make her feel desired again. Everywhere that Therese’s mouth and hands touched her intensified Carol’s desire. As her clit throbbed harder, her legs opened wider, desperate for the moment Therese’s mouth would connect with her throbbing need.

Therese moved oh, so slow down her body, but Carol didn’t mind at all. As much as she wanted that mouth on her pussy, Carol was also enjoying every kiss, lick, pinch, and caress that Therese was giving. Her body was starved for attention and Therese was expertly giving Carol what she needed. It was as if Therese knew her body better than _she_ did. 

When Therese finally reached Carol’s lower abdomen, she stopped to lock eyes with her. _Fuck, she looks so sexy._ She didn’t take her eyes off of Carol’s when she lowered her mouth to Carol’s mound and pushed her mouth into it. Carol struggled to keep her eyes open. She felt Therese’s tongue slip out and flick once over her clit. _Oh, she knows what she’s doing._

Therese pulled back and opened Carol up, spreading her pussy lips wide. The rush of air hit Carol and she felt herself dripping. She watched in anticipation as Therese stared intently at Carol’s open pussy. Finally, she looked up again and Carol thought she may be set on fire from the look in her eyes.

“You’re so beautiful, Carol.”

“Oh god, Therese. You’re killing me.”

Therese lowered her head again and kissed her softly. “You taste so good,” Therese whispered and Carol couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer.

Her head fell back into the pillow when Therese slowly licked her up and down. Why had she waited so long to do this with a woman again? Then it hit her that maybe this was how it was supposed to happen. That Therese was the one that she was subconsciously waiting for. 

Therese fingered her entrance while her tongue lapped at Carol’s swollen clit. Carol was a throbbing mess and she needed to open her eyes - she wanted to remember this. Therese was sexy while she was in control of Carol’s body. 

“Baby, fuck me.” Carol’s voice was hoarse when she spoke and she knew that when those fingers went inside her, she’d be done.

Therese easily slipped two fingers inside and pumped in and out while sucking on Carol’s clit. How did she become such a throbbing, wet mess so easily? When she felt her body start to tighten, she grabbed Therese’s shoulder and squeezed, needing to feel even more connected to her. Therese took her free hand and held Carol’s hand. It was such an intimate gesture and filled Carol with more love. 

“Oh god, I’m … oh fuck!” Carol cried out. Her orgasm rocketed through her body and she couldn’t remember the last time that it felt so wild. She felt like she was being completely ripped apart and maybe she was. Maybe this was a new Carol coming out, begging to be loved, aching to be touched. 

When Therese flicked her tongue over Carol’s clit once more, she felt it everywhere. Therese loved her, there was no doubt about that after what just happened. 

Carol couldn’t remember when it was over, but when she opened her eyes, Therese was hovering over her, softly kissing her neck. She pulled her down on top of her and held on. Therese was her anchor now. 

“Oh my god,” she finally managed to say. “Therese, that was …”

“Incredible,” Therese answered for her.

“That and so much more.” Therese laid down beside her and Carol ran her fingers over her wet mouth. “I guess I was pretty wet, huh?” Therese laughed and moved to kiss her.

“I’m not complaining at all,” she said with a smirk. “How are you feeling now?”

“Extremely relaxed. My god, you’re good at that.”

“I’ve had practice and I enjoy doing it.” Therese took Carol’s hand and moved it between her legs, through her wetness. “This is what you do to me,” she said.

“I want to taste you, but I might need a few minutes to recover.”

“That’s okay, you can do that later. Right now, I need you to fuck me.”

Carol moved her fingers, exploring Therese’s pussy. _Shit, she’s so wet._ She slid two fingers inside and Therese begged for another. Carol dipped her head down and sucked a nipple into her mouth, tugging on it with her teeth. Her thumb worked Therese’s clit while she fucked her with three fingers. The moans from Therese were her favorite sounds. No one she’d ever been with sounded so sexy. 

When Carol pumped harder with her hand, she felt Therese’s pussy pulling at her fingers, her muscles starting to contract. Carol missed being inside a woman. She always enjoyed using her mouth to make a woman come, but there was something about watching a woman come undone from her hand that drove Carol mad. The feeling of a pussy grabbing at her fingers and a woman on the verge of orgasm because of her always stroked her ego.

She watched curiously as Therese’s face contorted and her eyes shut. She was coming hard and Carol felt it on her hand; something she hadn’t felt in way too long. To have it be with Therese made it even sweeter.

Therese stopped her and held her hand in place as she convulsed around Carol’s fingers; another action that always fueled Carol’s arousal. When she finally pulled her fingers from Therese, she needed to taste her and she wasn’t surprised at how good she tasted. Carol knew that her head would be between those gorgeous legs before the night was over.

_Oh, I can’t wait …_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! Trust me, this isn't the last of their naked alone time. There's plenty more, so buckle up!


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More smut ...

“Wow,” Carol said as her head fell back onto the pillow. “That was fucking incredible,” she said in between breaths.

“No shit!” Therese exclaimed. “Damn, you have really good hands.” 

Therese rolled over and propped her head on her hand to look at Carol. She looked unbelievable in her post-orgasmic haze. Her smile, her glow … Therese could get used to the way Carol looked at that moment. 

“You think so?” Carol asked with a smirk.

“Oh yeah, but I think you already know that.”

Therese let her eyes skim over the naked beauty in front of her. She had seen Carol in a bikini before, but nothing compared to seeing her completely revealed in the flesh. She traced her finger around Carol’s nipple and watched it harden. The dark skin there contrasted perfectly with the creamy expanse of the rest of her body. _How is this woman real?_

“What are you thinking?” Carol asked.

“Just that I can’t believe that this is finally happening. I thought that I completely ruined it when I walked out that night.”

“You never ruined anything. I just had to be patient and wait for you, that’s all. I had a feeling you might come back to me.”

“How did you know? I didn’t even know.”

“Honestly, I don’t really know,” Carol said with a chuckle. “But I’m glad that I waited, aren’t you?”

“Obviously,” she said, smirking.

“Once I get my strength back, I need to get my head between your legs.”

The way she said it so seductively made Therese’s clit pulse. She was still recovering from her orgasm and the thought of Carol’s mouth coaxing her next orgasm from her made her only want more. 

“So, are you hungry?” Carol asked. “Because I’m sure that we’ll both need our energy.”

“Well, I think I just ate pretty well.”

Carol rolled over and propped her leg on Therese’s waist. The way she did it was so sexy, as if she was claiming her and Therese was more than willing to be claimed as Carol’s. Therese’s heart beat fast in her chest at how badly this woman wanted her. 

“That you did, Miss Belivet.” Carol ran her fingers over Therese’s lips. “I don’t know where you learned to do that, but goddamn, you’re excellent at it.”

Therese blushed just thinking about it; she was never one to be able to talk about sex, but maybe Carol could change her. While Therese enjoyed dirty talk, she was never any good at it, but she was sure that Carol was.

“Well, I’m glad that you think so. I was just doing what I love to do.” Therese averted her gaze from Carol. “I’m sorry, I’m not any good at talking about sex.”

“It’s okay. I think it’s adorable, the way that you blush. Come on, let’s find something to eat. You’ve taken all my energy with that perfect mouth.”

Carol stood up and went to her bag to find something to wear. It almost disappointed Therese because she didn’t want to see that perfect body covered by clothes. That body was a work of art that should never _have_ to be covered up. Therese looked closely at Carol’s ass; there was something there that she had never seen, something that couldn’t be seen when Carol was clothed.

“Oh my god, do you have a tattoo?” Therese jumped up off the bed and stood behind her.

“Oh Jesus. Yeah, I do.”

“How long have you had it?” Therese asked as she traced the letters with her fingers.

“Fifteen years, I think.”

A pang of jealousy ran through Therese for a brief moment at the fact that another woman’s name was tattooed on Carol. Then she felt silly for feeling that way because it wasn’t just any name, it was her wife’s. It wasn’t like Carol could predict that her wife would end her life so soon. 

“Did it hurt?”

“Enough that I didn’t get any more,” Carol said as she continued to look through her bag.

Therese realized that she had never loved anyone enough to have their name tattooed on her. Maybe one day she’d change her mind. 

“I’ve always wanted one, but have been too scared.”

“It’s really not that bad, I just never had the desire to get another one. If I would’ve known that she would have left me so soon, I don’t know if I would’ve gotten it.”

“Really? Why?”

“Well, I’m sure it’s not easy for you to see another woman’s name on my ass.”

“But she was your wife …”

“And she’s gone now.” Carol sounded bitter.

Therese knew that she still wasn’t over Jenna and she couldn’t blame her. They had been together for a long time and when Jenna killed herself, she never left a note. It had to be difficult for Carol: the not knowing.

“Are you all right?” Therese asked cautiously.

Carol took a deep breath. “It’s hard sometimes, that’s all.”

“You can always talk to me about it, you know. I don’t mind.”

Carol found the clothes that she was looking for and dressed, Therese did the same.

“It’s just … it’s frustrating because I’ll never know _why_ she did it. I get angry because it feels like she gave up on me, like she didn’t want to try. Then I blame myself for not seeing the signs when I should have. At the time, I was working a lot, so it’s easy for me to take the blame.”

“It’s not your fault, Carol.”

“I don’t know that, though.” Carol took Therese’s hand and squeezed. “I don’t want to talk about that. I’m here with you and that’s what’s important to me. Now, let’s get some food and preferably some more wine.”

Therese tried to put herself in Carol’s situation, how difficult it must have been to always wonder. She wondered how a woman could not only leave her wife behind, but also her daughter. It was obvious that Carol was still in pain over it and Therese hated that she blamed herself for losing her wife.

“Hey,” Therese said softly when they got into the kitchen. “I promise that if I’m ever having problems mentally, I’ll let you know, okay? I’d never put you through that.”

“Thank you, darling. That means a lot.”

Carol poured them some wine and they decided to use the grill to cook. Carol made a convincing argument that it would be easier that way and the less time they spent cooking, the more time they could spend in bed. Carol didn’t need to try and convince her, the way that she was looking at Therese was all the convincing she needed. 

They decided to take some time to let their food digest and relaxed in one of the lounge chairs, enjoying the evening. Therese couldn’t remember the last time that she had ever felt so content with another person or if she ever really had before. 

“Have you enjoyed your day so far?” Carol asked, holding Therese between her legs.

“So much and it’s not even over.”

“Oh, it’s far from over, sweetheart. Do you want to go back to bed?” she whispered into her ear and sent a chill down Therese’s spine. “Or I could make good on that promise from a while back and throw you into the water.”

“That won’t be necessary, I’m already wet enough.”

“Is that so?”

Therese jumped up and practically pulled Carol to the bedroom. They both quickly undressed and climbed into bed. She’d never get tired of being naked with Carol.

Carol rolled her onto her back and kissed her passionately. Therese felt the adrenaline coursing through her body. Carol’s mouth was about to be on her where no one’s had ever been before. She hadn’t told Carol that before because she didn’t want to put any pressure on her, but Therese was more than ready for it. Ready to feel Carol’s mouth bring her to orgasm. She’d never let anyone do that to her because she was too afraid of their reaction to her scars, but Carol was different and she knew that she wouldn’t react the same way that other people might.

Carol’s mouth was moving down her body, stopping and spending a delicious amount of time on her breasts. Her nipples were so hard, they ached for Carol’s touch. Carol’s hand slowly made its way down Therese’s stomach and between her legs. 

“You weren’t lying when you said you’re wet,” Carol whispered.

Therese finally opened her legs wide so that Carol could see all of her. Not that she’d never done it before, but now she was allowing someone to really look at her, someone that she trusted completely. She kissed down Therese’s stomach and down to her thighs. When Carol stopped, Therese closed her eyes and her head fell back on the pillow. She trusted Carol, but her default setting was to just try to avoid rejection. The looks that she had gotten before when someone had seen her scars were looks of pity and she didn’t want to see that from Carol.

Her breath hitched when she felt Carol’s mouth on her legs as she softly kissed her scars. Carol kissed a path from one scar to the next, back and forth between her legs. Damn, it felt good.

“Therese, you’re absolutely gorgeous,” she whispered in between kisses. 

Therese finally looked down to watch Carol worshipping her body. No one had ever kissed her the way Carol did. As she watched, she felt tears stinging the back of her eyes. She was finally letting go of all the shame that she felt from those nasty little scars that marked her. If Carol could love and appreciate them, why couldn’t she? Maybe this was what she needed to finally let go of the teenager she used to be. Those scars controlled every aspect of her life and it was time to not give them power anymore.

Carol’s hand lightly stroked up and down her pussy while her mouth still kissed the inside of her thighs. She was good at this, at making love to a woman and Therese was enjoying every second of it. 

“I haven’t told you this,” Carol said. “But I love that you don’t shave. I love this hair,” she said as she continued to stroke her fingers over Therese’s pussy.

“Jesus, you’re killing me,” Therese said with a chuckle.

“I can stop if you want me to.” Carol looked up, smirking at her.

“Oh no, you’re not getting off that easy.”

“Are you?”

Therese couldn’t help but laugh; she loved Carol’s sense of humor about sex. It helped put her at ease.

Carol finally moved her mouth to where Therese needed it the most and she moaned when she felt the wet heat of Carol’s mouth connect with her clit. She finally realized why women loved this; it was erotic and sexy and felt _oh_ so good. Therese was sure that she would become addicted to this feeling. 

Carol’s tongue lapped at her pussy lips and her fingers lightly massaged her clit. Therese had always enjoyed sex, but this was different. She wondered how she had gone this long without letting anyone do this to her. When Carol sucked her pussy lips into her mouth, Therese felt her entire body tingle. 

“Fuck!” Therese cried out. “Carol … oh my god, that feels so good.”

Carol’s tongue circled her clit and she knew that she wouldn’t last much longer. When Carol sucked it into her mouth, Therese’s back arched and she found it difficult to breath. Nothing in her life had ever seemed to be more important than this moment, than Carol loving her so perfectly.

“Fingers, Carol. Please.”

Carol slid two fingers inside while her mouth continued to work Therese’s clit. She felt her orgasm building as her stomach started to tighten.

“Fuck, don’t stop.”

Carol didn’t and when she moaned against her clit, Therese couldn’t hold it in any longer. Finally, she let go. Not just of her orgasm, but Therese finally let go of all of the shame, all of the sadness and the pain that her scars had caused her for so long. In Carol, she had someone that loved her unconditionally, someone that she wasn’t afraid to show herself to and be herself with. 

When she finally opened her eyes, she realized that she had been crying and Carol was lying next to her. She rolled over and Carol held her in her arms. 

“Are you okay, baby?” she asked.

Therese could only nod in response. Yes, she was okay, more than okay. She finally felt free and she knew that she wasn’t going back to who she was before Carol.

“No one’s ever done that to me.” Her voice sounded so small.

“No one’s ever made you feel that way?” Carol asked.

“Well no, but what I meant is that no one’s ever done _that_ to me. No one’s ever had their mouth on me there.” She was almost ashamed to admit it, but Carol would understand why.

“Well, now I feel honored. I’m glad you could trust me enough.”

“I _do_ trust you, Carol. You’re the first person to not look at me with pity when you saw my scars.” It was getting hard to not completely break down, but Therese was trying her best.

“Oh baby. They’re only scars. I know it’s difficult for you, but I could never pity you because of your scars. You’re not that person anymore. I love you for who you are, not because of what your body looks like. But I _must_ say that it is quite a beautiful body.”

Therese blushed when she looked up at Carol. The way Carol was looking at her was arousing. This woman definitely didn’t pity her; there was nothing but desire in those dark eyes.

“And if you’ll let me,” Carol said after a soft kiss. “I’d love to do that a lot more.”

“You may live to regret those words.”

“I highly doubt that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! Still enjoying the sex? LOL!


	20. Chapter 20

Therese woke up, unsure of her surroundings. When she felt someone next to her, she smiled, remembering the previous day and night. She and Carol were practically inseparable, staying naked most of the time. It felt good to be with her again and finally free of clothes.

She turned to look at the woman next to her. Even in sleep, Carol was beautiful. How was it possible to still look sexy while sleeping? If anyone could do it, it would definitely be Carol. This was the first time that they had slept together naked and Therese knew that she could get used to it, especially with those incredibly gorgeous breasts exposed just for her. Therese forced herself not to lick and suck those nipples that were begging for her attention.

“Good morning, gawker,” Carol said and opened one eye to look at Therese.

“Good morning, beautiful.”

Carol stretched and reached out to pull Therese to her for a kiss. “What time is it?”

“A little after ten.”

“Good lord, you’ve worn me out.”

“Is that a complaint?” Therese smirked.

“Not even close. I couldn’t be happier.”

“Really?” Therese still had a hard time accepting that she was there with Carol and that woman wanted to be with her.

“Really,” Carol said, raising her eyebrows. “I’m absolutely crazy about you.”

Therese blushed, chastising herself for not being able to control her body. Why was it always betraying her? She always hated how easily she blushed and Carol could do it to her like no one else. 

Carol ran her thumb over Therese’s lips, staring at them as she did. The look on her face stirred something in Therese’s stomach, a feeling that she was far too familiar with since yesterday.

“What are you thinking?” Therese asked.

“I’m thinking about what that mouth can do to me.”

“So, you like my mouth?”

“I love it.”

“Well, it loves you.” Therese leaned down and kissed Carol softly. “All of you. I could show you again if you’d like.”

“Mmmm,” Carol cooed. “Before you do that, I think I should shower and after that, I can make us some breakfast. I think we’ll need our energy again today.”

“Damn, no morning sex?” Therese was slightly disappointed; she couldn’t wait to have Carol as soon as she woke up.

“Baby, I’m sure that it’s a mess down there.” Carol chuckled. “After all that sex, I don’t think I’m very fresh.”

“You know, I don’t have to put my _mouth_ down there. I do have hands,” Therese said as her hand wandered down Carol’s stomach, stopping at the patch of curly hair that she had familiarized herself with yesterday and she felt Carol’s muscles tense. 

“They _are_ such wonderful hands. Who am I to argue with that?”

Therese wasted no time in sliding her fingers down further, meeting Carol’s deliciously wet lips. She slid her fingers inside and watched Carol as her breath caught in her throat. What a sight Carol was while Therese had her in this position. Her back slightly arched, her breasts jutted out and Therese _had_ to move her mouth to one of those beautiful peaks. 

When Carol came, she cried out. It was a sound that Therese knew she’d never tire of hearing. Afterwards, they decided to shower … together, of course. Carol made breakfast for the both of them and they ate outside. Therese couldn’t remember the last time that she enjoyed a morning more perfect than this one. Everything was just right for her. She and Carol were finally back together and she envisioned many other mornings waking up this way. 

She took a sip of her coffee and looked out over the lake. Therese wasn’t sure if it was really a beautiful _late_ morning or if she was blinded by love, but everything seemed perfect. Flowers seemed more colorful, leaves on the trees seemed greener and the sun seemed brighter.

Therese’s thoughts were broken by Carol’s phone ringing. She smiled at her as Carol answered her phone.

“Hello, Mom,” Carol said and smirked at Therese. “Hold on a second,” she said and looked at Therese. “Sweetheart, I’ll be right back,” she said to her. She kissed her softly on the cheek and went inside. Watching Carol walk away wasn’t such a bad sight.

* * *

“I hope I’m not bothering you, Carol,” Gloria said.

“Not at all, Mom. Is something wrong?”

“Nothing at all. Just a little curious. I tried to wait as late as I could, but I have to know if you two are getting along.”

“We’re getting along just fine, Mom,” Carol said, grinning ear to ear.

“Just fine?”

“More than fine. It’s been incredible, Mom.”

“Oh good. I’m _so_ happy for you, Carol. So, you two are … umm, compatible then, huh?”

“Extremely.”

“You sound happy.”

“I really am, Mom. She’s just so … perfect.”

“Okay, I feel some relief. Just wanted to make sure that you two were good. I don’t want to be a bother, I know you two want to be alone, but I’m _really_ happy for the both of you.”

“Mom, you’re not a bother at all and thank you. How are Rindy and Evan treating you and Dad? Have they driven you crazy yet?”

“Not quite. Your father loves it, you know that. But they’re wondering when they can go up to the lake. I already told them that they’d have to wait a few days.”

“I think that’s a fair assumption. We’ll need some more time alone.”

“Not a problem, sweetheart. I was just checking in. I’ll leave you alone. Give Therese my love.”

“I will. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Carol hung up and couldn’t stop smiling. Giving in to her feelings for Therese felt good. She thought back to last night and this morning and was sure that this woman would wear her out. But she didn’t care; it felt amazing to have her body shown so much attention. What bothered her though, was the fact that she had forgotten about that tattoo of Jenna’s name. It wasn’t as if it was in a place that she was able to see regularly. Having Therese see it made her feel awful.

Therese opened the door, bringing their dishes inside and put them in the sink.

“I could have helped you with that,” Carol said.

“Nope. You cooked, I’ll clean,” she said, smiling.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Does that tattoo bother you?” She saw Therese tense. Stupid question; of course it bothered her. “I mean, I’m sure you don’t like seeing it.”

“No, it’s fine.” Therese started washing the dishes, her back towards Carol. “It’s not the most exciting thing to see another woman’s name on you while I’m trying to make love to you, but I’m not an idiot. I know that you thought the two of you would be together for a really long time, so I get why you have it. She was your wife.” Therese shrugged and Carol was sure that it was difficult for her. 

“I never got rid of it because I tend to forget that it’s there. I’ve thought about getting rid of it, but I’ve heard that it hurts worse than getting a tattoo. I’ve also considered getting it covered up.”

“Look, Carol.” Therese turned around. “You don’t have to do that for me, okay? It’s not that big of a deal, really. I just didn’t know that you had one, that’s all. It’s kind of sexy.” Therese blushed, probably thinking about her hands on Carol’s ass.

“Oh yeah?”

“Why on your ass, though?” It was Carol’s turn to blush. _Shit._ “Oh, this must be good if _you’re_ blushing.”

“Well, it’s a spot that you can’t really see and I can cover up if I need to …”

“Uh huh, is there another reason?”

“Umm, well … when we decided to get them …”

“Wait, she had one?”

“Mmhmm, my name right underneath her left breast.” Therese gave her a puzzled look. “I spent a lot of time there.” Therese’s mouth dropped open as if she put it all together before Carol had a chance to tell her.

“So …”

“Yes, she spent a lot of time on my ass.”

“Holy shit.” Therese’s eyes went wide.

“I wasn’t ready to tell you all of that yet, but that’s why.”

“So, when you say she spent a lot of time on your ass … what does that mean? Like … _fucking_ you in the ass?” Therese was blushing furiously and Carol had to laugh. This conversation was very awkward for the both of them.

“Well … not with a strap on or a dildo if that’s what you’re thinking. Uhh … she used her mouth quite a bit and her fingers. Jesus, this is an _interesting_ conversation.” Carol chuckled nervously, unsure of Therese’s reaction. They had yet to discuss their proclivities in the bedroom. So far, the sex was somewhat vanilla, but Carol enjoyed it nonetheless. “Therese, I don’t expect you to do any of that, just so you know. We’re still learning about each other.”

Therese washed her hands and walked over to Carol with a smirk on her face.

“So, you like that, huh?”

Carol found it difficult to look Therese in the eye. Was she ashamed that she enjoyed it? She knew that she shouldn’t be. Carol was generally confident in the bedroom and she and Jenna had once had an extremely active and healthy sex life. But this was the first time that she had to learn about someone new in a long time and sharing her _kinks_ wasn’t easy.

“It’s okay if you do, you know.” Therese must have sensed that she was uneasy.

“Yeah … I do, but like I said, I don’t expect you to do anything like that. I know that it’s not for everyone …” Therese covered her mouth with her hand.

“Stop. There’s nothing wrong with it. I don't mind having my mouth there.”

“Really?” Carol was genuinely surprised. Therese seemed so reserved and innocent. Apparently Carol had a lot to learn about this one.

“I do. I have an idea. Why don’t I give a massage?”

“You just want to get me naked again.”

“Absolutely. Go get naked, lie down on your stomach and wait for me.” A surge of arousal shot through Carol’s body at the tone of Therese’s words.

“So demanding, Miss Belivet.”

Carol did as she was told and waited for Therese on the bed. The thought alone of Therese’s hands on her body, massaging her made her pussy drip with arousal. When Therese came into the bedroom and stood beside the bed, Carol turned her head to watch her undress. She had witnessed Therese go from too scared to show Carol her body to being ridiculously confident and Carol found it unbelievably arousing. She was no longer afraid to show herself to Carol, no longer that scared woman she was over a month ago.

Therese grabbed some lotion and sat next to Carol on the bed. She started at Carol’s calves and massaged. Her hands were like magic, but Carol already knew that from that morning. She didn’t realize how sore she had been and slowly melted into the bed. When Therese’s hand crept higher and higher, Carol was filled with excitement at the possibility of how this massage would end up. Therese purposely ignored Carol’s throbbing pussy and worked her way around it. 

She shuffled around on the bed and moved to straddle Carol, her soaked pussy connecting firmly with Carol’s ass. Carol took a deep breath when she felt Therese’s wetness. She worked Carol’s back slower than Carol would have liked, but she knew that Therese was drawing out this seduction as long as she could. She felt Therese massaging the spot on her upper butt cheek, where her tattoo was and it made her feel slightly guilty, even though she knew she shouldn’t. It was still a sign left behind from Jenna claiming a spot on her body.

“It doesn’t belong to her, you know?”

“I know.”

“You have me now.”

“Mmmm.” 

She felt Therese’s hips moving against her ass, spreading her juices all over. Carol lifted her ass slightly; a sign for Therese not to stop. 

“Don’t stop, Therese.” Carol reached around for Therese’s leg to keep her in the position she was in. “That feels good, baby.”

Therese only moaned in response and moved faster and faster. Carol was sure it wouldn’t be long until she came.

“Are you going to come on me, baby?” Louder moans still; Therese was extremely receptive to the dirty talk. “Come on my ass, baby.” That was all she needed and she came hard all over Carol.

“Oh fuck, Carol.”

“Mmmm, sweetheart. That felt good.”

Therese wasted no time in moving between Carol’s legs. She opened them wide and slipped two fingers inside Carol’s entrance.

“Oh Jesus,” Carol moaned.

But Therese wasn’t done. She did something that surprised Carol. Therese’s fingers on her other hand spread Carol’s ass apart and she felt her tongue lick up and down her ass crack. Her hips moved, wanting to meet more of Therese’s mouth. Therese’s tongue moved around at her delicate hole while her other hand continued to fuck Carol more vigorously.

“Fuck Therese, don’t stop. Oh god, that feels so good.”

Carol hadn’t felt that in what felt like an eternity and she sure wasn’t expecting it today. But she started to believe that if she shared more of the things that she liked, Therese was sure to explore with her. Therese wasn’t lying the day before when she said that she’d do _anything_. 

The feeling of Therese’s mouth there, her fingers working her pussy, it was all too much and Carol finally let go. It was intense, but damn, did it feel good.

“You know,” Carol said after she turned over. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know.” Therese looked almost embarrassed.

“But my god, that mouth of yours just keeps surprising me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After writing that, I fully admit that I'm trash. XD


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since I updated. Sorry about that. Of course there's more sex in this one!

When Carol woke up and looked at Therese, she couldn’t imagine her life being any better than it was at that moment. It wasn’t that long ago that she thought she’d never be over Jenna’s abrupt end to life. While it was true that she had missed her, Carol realized how angry she had been for so long at Jenna for leaving her. Carol had been holding on to anger against her wife for leaving and not trying to work on her problems. When she looked at Therese sleeping peacefully next to her, she finally knew it was time to let go of that anger in order to move on with her life, in order to be happy with Therese.

Therese rolled over with her face towards her and Carol was thankful to have her in her life. She looked gorgeous even in sleep and Carol couldn’t imagine a more perfect way to wake up. Sure, she had woken up with Therese next to her before, but waking up next to her while they were both were naked was even more exciting. 

She was grateful for Therese finding her way back to her and finally being able to trust her. While Carol had been devastated when Therese had left that night, she knew that it was only a matter of time before she would have her back in her life. Because their love was something that wasn’t easy to find and Carol was slowly coming to terms with the fact that while she loved Jenna, she never had that with her. Never had that all-consuming love that she had found with Therese. Therese was a part of her; she felt it from the moment they met and she knew that they’d be together.

“Hey,” Therese said when she opened her eyes. Those eyes. They sparkled when she looked at Carol and her smile lit up the room even more with the morning light.

“Hey yourself.”

“Have you been awake long?”

“Not too long,” Carol said and moved a hand to Therese’s back. It was always that way with Therese, Carol _had_ to be touching her whenever she could. 

“You look like you’ve been thinking.”

“I have.”

“What have you been thinking about, my love?”

“A lot of things. You mostly.”

“Uh huh. What else?”

“Jenna.”

“Oh? Do you want to talk about it?”

Although they had talked about Jenna before, Carol always got the feeling that Therese had never been jealous about how often Jenna came up in their conversations. It was just another reason to love Therese even more.

“We don’t have to. I’m sure it’s not something that you want to talk about right now.”

“I really don’t mind, Carol. She was a part of your life for a long time and you can talk to me about anything.”

“Well, I was just thinking about how angry I’ve been with her for so long for leaving the way that she did. For not trying to talk to me and leaving Rindy. But I know that it’s not that easy when it comes to mental illness and I’ve been holding on to this anger for no reason. I’m ready to let it go and forgive her, but more importantly, I need to forgive myself and that’s not easy for me to do, but I think I’m ready. I can’t do anything to change the past, but I don’t need to hold onto these feelings anymore.”

“I’m so proud of you, Carol.”

“I wouldn’t be able to do it without you.” Carol moved to kiss her softly. “I love you so much and that’s something else that I’ve been struggling with. Not because I love you, but … I never felt this way about Jenna. I mean I loved her, still do, but I never felt so intense about her the way that I do you. It’s kind of difficult to come to terms with that, but I’m trying to.”

“Well, if it helps you at all, I’ve never felt so intense about anyone either.”

“Thank you, darling. It _does_ help. At least I know that my feelings are reciprocated.”

“Oh, they most definitely are,” Therese said. “I’m so fucking crazy about you and I want you to know that you can talk to me about this any time you need to. I don’t want you to think that you can’t.”

“I know I can and I can’t tell you how important that is to me.”

“ _You’re_ important to me.” Therese rolled on top of Carol, straddling her in the process and leaned down to kiss her. “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything, darling.”

“After that night, that I … well, you know. But I saw that you were gone for about three days. Where did you go?”

“I came here,” Carol said with a smile.

“Really?”

“Mmmhmm. I needed to get away. I needed some time alone. At first, I was depressed and just needed to cry and let it all out.” Carol noticed Therese swallow hard. It was probably not easy for her to hear this. “But then, I just somehow knew that you’d come back to me. I knew that we’d be together. I just needed to be patient and give you time and space.”

“How did you know?”

“I don’t really know, but I knew that we have a love that’s impossible to describe and that eventually you’d come around.”

“You’re not wrong on that.” 

Therese smirked and leaned down to kiss Carol’s neck. This woman was insatiable and Carol loved every minute of it. She knew that there would be no more talking for right now because Therese was kissing her way down to Carol’s breast. While her mouth sucked hungrily on Carol’s right breast, her hand kneaded her left one. Carol would never tire of the way Therese knew exactly how to treat her body. 

“Hey,” Carol said, interrupting what was sure to be another earth shattering orgasm. “I have a question.” Something that Carol had wondered about when Therese had told her that no one had ever had their head between her legs.

“You have a question now? My mouth’s a little full right now,” she said as she looked up at Carol and continued sucking.

“Oh fuck.” Carol took a deep breath. “Yeah, I do.”

Therese pulled herself away and looked up at Carol. “What is it, love?”

“I’m just curious about what you said the other day. About no one going down on you before.”

“Uh huh.”

“What about your girlfriend? I mean, you never let her?”

“Actually, no I didn’t. She wasn’t happy that I didn’t let her and I’m sure that’s one of the reasons why she left. I don’t blame her, but I just wasn’t comfortable with it at the time.”

“Oh.” Carol suddenly had an idea. “Well, I’m glad that you’ve let _me_. I know that you just had a destination in mind, but I have an idea, if you’d like to try it.”

“What’s that?”

Carol pulled Therese up to her and smiled. “I have a feeling that there’s nothing that you wouldn’t do with me, especially after that massage.” Carol gave her a wink. “I’d very much like for you to sit on my face.”

“Jesus, are you serious?”

“Extremely, but only if you want to. Wouldn’t you like to try it?” Carol whispered, conjuring her most seductive tone.

“Yes,” Therese said after swallowing hard. She awkwardly climbed on top of Carol, positioning her legs on either side of Carol’s head. “This feels weird,” she said while blushing. “What if I collapse on you and crush you when I come?”

“Then I will die happy.” Carol hooked her arms around Therese’s thighs.

“Okay,” Therese said. “What do I do now? My only reference for this is from porn.”

“Miss Belivet, you watch porn?”

“Like you don’t.”

“Touché.” Carol winked while looking up at Therese. “Just lower yourself onto my mouth.”

* * *

Therese was nervous, being in a position that she’d never been in before. Looking down at Carol’s dark eyes helped, but Jesus it was awkward. She’d seen it plenty in porn, but to actually be doing this right now was something she had never envisioned. But Carol seemed more than eager for this to happen.

Therese held on to the headboard for support and did as Carol instructed. When Carol’s mouth connected with her swollen pussy lips, Therese inhaled sharply. It was a different sensation to have Carol beneath her like that.

“Oh, Jesus Christ,” Therese breathed out. How had she gone from shy woman to having no inhibitions anymore in such a short period of time? She had one person to thank for that: Carol Aird. Therese was fine with that, too, because she was happier than she’d ever been. The woman that she had been a week ago would never have found herself in this position, would never have even imagined anything like this. However, she was not disappointed.

Therese was lost in her thoughts, not realizing that she had been grinding Carol’s face. Suddenly she stopped, becoming bashful and scared all at once.

“Oh fuck, I’m sorry. You probably can’t breathe,” she said laughing.

“Don’t apologize, baby. Keep going if it feels good for you. Trust me, I’m not bothered at all by it.”

God, when Carol said it that way, it drove Therese mad with lust. Even looking at Carol’s glistening face was causing her to grow wetter by the second. She resumed her earlier position, feeling Carol’s tongue gliding along her slit. Jesus, was there anything more erotic than what she was doing? She felt Carol stop her as she sucked Therese’s throbbing clit into her mouth, not spending near enough time there when she abruptly moved her tongue to enter Therese’s dripping pussy.

“Oh fuck, Carol!”

That was a completely new sensation for her: Carol’s tongue sliding in and out of her. How had she never allowed herself to be fucked this way? Therese decided then and there that there was no better sexual feeling that being fucked by Carol’s tongue. She braced herself against the headboard when Carol’s fingers moved to her clit. Carol’s deft fingers worked her clit while her tongue expertly fucked her. When she felt that familiar warmth spread throughout her body, she knew that she was finished. She came hard on Carol’s tongue, not worrying about the fact that she was probably flooding Carol’s face.

It was difficult to move her legs after such an intense orgasm, but she finally did and laid beside Carol. 

“Holy shit,” she said while still trying to catch her breath. “That was fucking insane.”

“You liked that, huh?” Carol asked with a smirk.

“Oh yeah, I definitely want to do _that_ again sometime.”

“Anytime, darling.”

“Will you do something for me?”

“Anything.”

“Touch yourself? I want to watch.”

“Why, Miss Belivet, I didn’t know you were such a perv,” she said, sarcastically. “I would be more than happy to do that for you.”

Carol spread her legs wide and Therese had wondered how many times she’d done this for someone. She moved herself between Carol’s gorgeous legs for her own personal show. Carol had so much confidence and no shame in opening herself for Therese to watch. Therese kissed the inside of Carol’s thighs and watched as her fingers slowly moved up and down her slit. Carol was making a production of it and Therese couldn’t be happier to be allowed to watch.

“You smell so good,” she said when she kissed Carol’s fingers. 

“That might still be you on my fingers, darling.” How could one woman be so ridiculously sexy?

Therese watched as Carol slid two fingers inside and her back arched as she did. She seemed to want to prolong her orgasm for Therese’s entertainment, even though she was clearly more than ready for one. Therese wasn’t sure if she’d be able to be a bystander, wanting desperately to move Carol’s hands and replace them with her mouth. But she mustered up as much self-control that she could because this was for her and she was very much enjoying the show. 

Carol’s other hand worked her clit while she continued to fuck herself. Therese’s kisses on Carol’s thighs became more insistent and harder until she started sucking. 

“Baby, keep doing that,” Carol said.

Therese didn’t stop and watched as Carol brought herself to orgasm, moaning Therese’s name while she did. She needed to taste Carol after she came and when Carol moved her hands away, Therese lapped at the juices from her orgasm. Fuck, she tasted good and Therese was beyond addicted to this woman. 

“Oh, Therese,” Carol said and twisted her fingers through Therese’s hair. “Are you trying to make me come again?”

“Mmmm,” was all Therese was able to get out since her mouth was full of Carol.

It didn’t take long for Carol to be screaming from her second orgasm. If Therese had it her way, she’d stay down there all damn day, making this woman come over and over again. But Carol finally pulled her head up to her to kiss her softly.

“What a fucking way to wake up,” Carol said when she pulled away and her head hit the pillow.

“I have to agree.”

“If you keep waking me up that way, you’re going to kill me eventually.”

“But what a way to go out, right?” Therese laughed.

“Absolutely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew!


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's more sex in this one because I'm trash ...

“So, this is our last night together before the kids and my parents come up tomorrow,” Carol said as she pulled Therese against her. “Is there anything special that you want to do tonight?”

“I think everything that we’ve done has been pretty special so far, don’t you?”

“Of course I do. I was just wondering if there was anything else that you wanted to do.”

“Just another spectacular night with you as usual.”

“Okay, well if I’m being honest, I want to cook for you tonight.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. I hope you have something pretty to wear. Like one of your flowing, flowery dresses that you like to wear.”

“You like those, huh?” Oh, Therese knew that Carol loved her in them. The way that Carol looked at her when she wore them sent chills up her spine.

“I really do. You look so adorably innocent and sexy at the same time.”

“Well, it just so happens that I have a couple of them with me.”

“Is that so?”

“Mmmhmmm. What are you cooking for us tonight?”

“That’s a surprise, darling. I also may have to do some decorating that I want to surprise you with.”

“Really?” Therese ran her hands underneath Carol’s shirt and up her back. 

“Yes, sweetheart and if your hands keep moving the way that they are, I won’t be able to get anything done.”

“That’s kind of the plan.” She pulled Carol to her and kissed her softly. “Could I ask you something?”

“Anything, my love.”

“What happens when we get back?”

“Like back home?”

“Yeah. I mean, it’s been so nice going to bed with you and waking up with you. I’m going to miss that, but I’m not sure if it would be too soon to move in together.” Therese was nervous. Was she ready to live with Carol? _Was_ it too soon?

“Honestly, I’m ready for anything that you want.” Carol held Therese firmly in place, clearly trying to ease her. “I’m forty and life is way too short to worry about if it’s too soon for us. I’m ready for anything with you. If you want to move in together, I’m all for it, but if you want to take some time and live separately, I’m okay with that too. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Was that worrying you? Asking me about that?”

“A little.” Therese smiled nervously, but felt relief wash over her. 

“Now, I need to start cooking. Would you like to help?”

“Sure!” Therese exclaimed. “What are we cooking?”

“I initially wanted to do this on my own, but I think I’d rather you help me.”

“I can be your sous chef.”

“My _sexy_ sous chef. But it shouldn’t take long to make, so I think I’ll shower and change first. Would you care to join me?”

* * *

Therese tried to control herself in the shower with Carol, but that was impossible - for both of them. Carol told her to get dressed and wait until she called her down to start cooking. She had some sort of surprise and Therese wasn’t quite sure what she was up to, but she didn’t care. 

She thought about the brief conversation they had about living together and Therese loved that Carol was so honest about the way that she felt. Therese couldn’t stand when someone was so unsure of something, but Carol wasn’t that way at all. She was open and honest with the way she felt about Therese and she clearly envisioned a future with her. The thought made Therese’s heart swell and she already knew that she wanted to live with Carol, but she needed to gauge Carol’s reaction first. When Carol called for Therese to come to the kitchen, she already knew that she was going to tell Carol that she wanted them to live together. Now, it was only a matter of where they would live. She fully intended on discussing it at dinner.

“I think you already started without me,” Therese said when she descended the stairs. Carol looked gorgeous as usual and Therese loved that her hair was down. 

“Guilty, but I only wanted to prove to you that I can cook.”

“You don’t have to prove anything to me. I would cook for you every day if that’s what you wanted.” Therese stood behind Carol and wrapped her arms around her waist. She kissed her softly on her neck.

“I think you would spoil me that way, sweetheart.”

“I wouldn’t mind spoiling you, you know.”

“I have a feeling that’s true.” Carol turned in Therese’s arms and pushed her back to look at her. “God, you look incredible.” Therese gave a twirl in her dress and giggled. “I don’t know what it is about you in a dress like that that drives me mad, but it does.”

“I’m glad it does,” Therese said, raising her eyebrows. “What are you cooking anyway?” Therese craned her neck to look at the stove.

“Right now I’m working on the risotto, but the vegetables are done and I’m about to start on the scallops.”

“Wow, you’ve really gone all out. Risotto? It’s not easy to make.”

“I know, but I’ve been practicing for a while and I think I’ve finally perfected it.”

“Color me impressed. Do you need any help?”

“Do you have any experience with cooking scallops? Because I don’t.”

“Of course I do and mine are pretty damn good.”

While Therese cooked the scallops, Carol poured them some wine and walked out to the deck. Therese watched curiously while she cooked. Suddenly, her eyes lit up when the lights outside came on. Lights were strung up everywhere and lit up the darkness. 

“Oh my god,” Therese whispered.

Carol came back inside and looked at the stove. “How’s it coming along?”

“Carol, did you do that?”

“I did.”

“It’s beautiful out there. I hope we’re eating out there.”

“We are.”

“So, was that your big surprise?”

“One of them, yes,” she said with a smirk. Therese knew that smirk was a naughty one. She knew that there was something else planned and the thought sent butterflies through her stomach. Therese was confident that the next surprise had something to do with after dinner and the two of them being naked.

“So, you’re not going to tell me what the other one is?”

“No, baby. You’ll have to wait for that one.” She gave a wink.

When everything was ready, they took their plates outside and sat down to eat. Therese was mesmerized by the lights and how they lit up the deck. It gave her ideas to do this at home. Speaking of …

“Hey, about earlier. I was thinking about our living situation when we get back.”

“Mmhmm.”

“So, would one of us move in with the other or would we find a place to live?”

“Are you saying you want to live together?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel pressured at all.”

“I don’t. At all.”

“Okay, so what do you want to do? Do you want to move in with me?”

“I think it would make more sense. Don’t you?”

“Of course. I have a room that’s not being used. It could be Evan’s room.”

“Are you sure you’re okay with us living together?”

Carol reached across the table for Therese’s hand.

“Darling, of course I am. There’s nothing in this world that would make me happier than to go to bed with you and wake up with you and spend my entire life with you. You’re my world, baby.”

“Fuck,” Therese whispered, unable to stop herself from crying. “No one’s ever told me that before.”

“It’s true, honey. I don’t want anyone else. I’m so _fucking_ crazy about you. I love you so much.”

“I love you, too. No one’s ever made me feel the way that you do, ever loved me like you. It feels so fucking good.”

“Let’s finish our dinner so you can get your next surprise. You’ll need your energy,” Carol said with a wink and Therese melted inside.

After dinner, they sat outside for a while, drinking wine and talking. Therese knew that she’d never been loved this way before and she was happier than she’d ever been in her life. 

Once Carol turned off the lights, she took Therese by the hand and led her to the bedroom. They sat on the bed, kissing slowly and Therese felt her skin sizzle with desire. Would that feeling ever get old with Carol? She hoped that it wouldn’t. 

“So, your surprise,” Carol said when she pulled back, “is probably not a big surprise, but I want to know how comfortable you are first.”

Therese grinned when she thought she knew what Carol’s surprise was. It could really only be one thing and Therese was more than excited.

“Okay.”

“Do you know what it is?”

“I have an idea. And if I’m right, you’d better go strap up so you can fuck me with it.”

Carol’s breath hitched and her eyes went dark. “Are you sure?” she asked, her voice suddenly lower.

“Hell yes.”

“So, you like toys, huh?” she asked with a wicked smile that made Therese’s clit stand at attention.

“Yeah,” Therese said with a confident nod.

“Well, I’ll go change and you get undressed. How does that sound?”

“Perfect.”

Therese did as she was told and waited for Carol. She sat on the edge of the bed with a grin on her face. When the door to the bathroom opened, she held her breath. She was not disappointed to see Carol in nothing but a strap on with her hair still down. That hair down was Therese’s undoing. Carol’s hair was getting longer and it was definitely a turn on for Therese.

“Well?” Carol asked as she stood in the doorway.

“Get over here already.”

“Someone’s anxious.”

“This is something that I’ve fantasized about for a while.”

“Is that so, Miss Belivet?” Carol asked seductively as she walked towards the bed. Therese felt herself getting wetter as her clit throbbed wildly. She could only nod in response as the gorgeous blonde crawled on top of her. She knew eventually that this “honeymoon” phase of theirs would diminish over time, but she’d never tire of seeing Carol this way. Seeing her eyes that dark and stormy and only for her.

“I have so much to learn about you in the bedroom,” Therese whispered as she pulled Carol down for a searing kiss. “And I can’t wait to find out everything about you.”

“Oh sweetheart, you don’t even know the half of it. I’m extremely adventurous.”

“I like the sound of that. I’m willing to try anything with you.”

Therese felt the tip of the dildo pressing against her center when Carol kissed her again; a kiss that felt as wet as her pussy was. She pushed herself against Therese and their breasts were pressed firmly together, nipples poking into each other. 

Carol finally pulled back onto her knees between Therese’s legs. Therese could only spread herself wide in response because with Carol, it didn’t matter how her legs looked. The scars didn’t bother Therese anymore. Carol never looked at her with pity – in fact, it was the opposite. There was only love in those eyes along with burning desire. She wasn’t afraid to touch the part of her body that Therese hated the most. When Carol’s hands moved to her inner thighs and massaged, it only made Therese wetter.

Her hands slowly moved higher and grazed over Therese’s swollen pussy. Sex never felt this good with anyone, but Therese had to remind herself that this was more than sex; this was love.

When Carol’s fingers grazed over her clit and slid down to her entrance, Therese gasped. She easily slid two fingers inside and back out. Therese watched as she brought them to her mouth to suck them clean. Damn, if it wasn’t erotic. 

“I see someone’s more than ready.” Carol raised her eyebrows.

She reached for the lube and Therese enjoyed watching Carol stroke the dildo. For someone who had never been with a man, she could make a hand job look like something she had done all the time. Therese had to admit to herself that it was pretty hot to watch.

At one point in her life, Therese thought she enjoyed being with men, but not anymore. There was nothing hotter than Carol in a strap-on, looking so dominant with that dildo standing at attention ready to fuck. That was the excellent thing about being with a woman; the option to get rid of the dick at any moment. Because if Therese was being honest with herself, she loved pussy, especially Carol’s. And Carol had something else that men didn’t: an incredible body with gorgeous tits to match.

“I can’t take it anymore. Fuck me, already,” Therese begged. “You look so fucking sexy.”

When Carol moved back on top of her, Therese pulled her knees up. She needed to feel all of what Carol was going to give her.

“Lie back and enjoy, darling,” Carol said before kissing her and sliding the dildo inside. Therese moaned in response.

Carol was slow at first and gradually picked up her pace. Her mouth slowly moved from Therese’s and down to her neck, kissing softly. Carol’s thrusting became harder and faster at Therese’s request. She sat up slightly and moved her hands to the back of Therese’s knees, pushing down and opening her even wider. 

“Goddamn, you’re flexible,” Carol said as she pushed on her legs. “Does that hurt? If it does, I’ll stop.” The way that Carol said it with such concern in her voice made Therese’s heart melt.

“It doesn’t hurt at all and I’m extremely flexible.”

“Oh, fuck. I had no idea.”

“You have a lot to learn about me.” She pulled Carol down and kissed her hard. “Now, fuck me hard and don’t stop until I come.”

“I really _do_ have a lot to learn,” Carol said and sat up. She firmly held Therese’s legs in place and did as Therese asked.

The way that Carol fucked her felt good, but what was even better was watching her. Sweat was forming on her forehead and when she pounded into Therese, her tits bounced and _that_ was the hottest sight to her. Therese knew that she’d come just from watching Carol, but she decided to rub her clit anyway, wanting a stronger orgasm. She came hard and felt the liquid pouring out of her. 

“Shit!” she screamed and held Carol in place. When she was finished, her legs collapsed and Carol fell on top of her. 

“You know the only thing I hate about being a woman?” Carol asked.

“What?”

“Not being able to feel you throbbing around that cock.”

Therese knew exactly how she felt; she often wondered how incredible that must feel. The only thing that she could use was her fingers, so she’d have to settle for that. 

“I know what you mean,” she said, trying to catch her breath. “Either way, you’re incredible with that thing. Jesus, I’ve never been fucked like that.”

“Is that so?” Carol asked, propping herself up to look at Therese.

“Never,” Therese answered honestly. “I’ve been fucked with a dildo and the real thing, but never that good. Then again, I’ve never felt comfortable with anyone the way that I do with you.”

“Well, I’d say you’re extremely comfortable with me … and flexible.” Carol smirked.

“If you’re as flexible as I am, this may be even more fun than I ever imagined.”

“Only one way to find out,” Carol said, raising an eyebrow.

“That sounds like a challenge.”

“I like challenges.”

“So do I.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The smut fest has been exciting, but unfortunately this is the last chapter with smut in it. I hope you've enjoyed it!


	23. Chapter 23

“So,” Gloria said when she sat down in a chair next to Carol. “You look good. Glowing actually.” It didn’t take much for Carol to blush, thinking about her _activities_ with Therese. “How are you?”

Carol looked over at her father getting the boat ready to take it out. She knew how much he loved his new toy.

“I’m great. Never been better.”

“So, the two of you are … getting it on like rabbits?” she asked while raising her eyebrows.

“Mom!” Carol didn’t think that it was possible to blush harder, but she did.

“Well? How would you like me to ask it?”

“I’d like not to discuss my sex life with you, actually.”

“Ah, so there _is_ a sex life, then?”

“As if you didn’t know.” Carol shook her head. “Yes Mom, there’s a sex life, of course.”

“And?”

“And what? You want me to tell you about it?”

“Good lord, not the details. Just … you know, is it good for you? Are you enjoying yourself?”

When she thought about sex with Therese, she couldn’t help the wide grin that plastered itself across her face.

“God, yes. So much.”

“So it’s good then, huh?”

“Amazing,” Carol said, dreamy eyed. “Probably the best. No, I take that back, it _is_ the best I’ve ever had. And it gets better every single night.”

“I’m so happy for you, Carol,” Gloria said and gave Carol’s leg a squeeze. “And here comes the reason for your happiness,” she said when Therese walked through the sliding glass door.

“Hey, beautiful,” Carol said when she turned to Therese. “Have a seat,” she said and patted the seat between her legs. Therese eased back into Carol’s embrace.

“You two are absolutely adorable,” Gloria said. “So, what’s going to happen when you both get home? Are you going to continue to live separately?”

“You’re on a roll today, Mom.”

“Just curious.”

“I’m sure.”

“Well?” she asked, waiting patiently.

“Actually,” Therese said. “I’ll be moving in with Carol.”

It was nice to not have to be the one to answer all of her mother’s questions. At least Therese could help with that.

“Uh huh, and when’s the wedding?”

“Mom!”

“Carol, it’s okay,” Therese said with a chuckle. “We’re not getting married … yet. But I wouldn’t mind marrying your daughter one day.”

“Really?” Carol asked, slightly surprised by what Therese had just said. Did Carol want to be married again? Of course she did; she loved being married. It had always been a joy to introduce Jenna as her wife to someone. Their marriage only seemed to make their relationship stronger and Carol _did_ love being married. But it was still _way_ too soon to be getting married. Not that she didn’t love Therese, but she wanted to wait a little while before they walked down the aisle.

“Of course, silly. I’ve only been in love with you most of my life. Why wouldn’t I want to marry you? You’re absolutely the one woman I want to spend the rest of my life with.”

“So, you wouldn’t say no if I ever asked you to marry me?”

“If I did, it would be the dumbest decision of my life.”

“But we’re not even living together yet.”

“I don’t need to live with you to know that I want to be with you forever.”

Carol looked over at her mother and Gloria winked at her. She kissed the top of Therese’s head and squeezed her a little tighter, thankful to have her. This is exactly what she needed that she had been missing. She realized that it wasn’t that she stopped looking for love, but that she was waiting for the right one to come along at the right time. And that right one was Therese. 

“Maybe I should have left the two of you alone up here for a few more days,” Gloria said.

“Oh no, Mom. We’re happy you, Dad and the kids are here. Therese and I have the rest of our lives to enjoy each other.”

“That’s absolutely true,” Therese chimed in. “We’re absolutely thrilled that you, Bruce, and the kids are up here. I know I was looking forward to it.”

“Are you gorgeous ladies ready for a boat ride?” Bruce asked, approaching.

“You sure you know how to drive that thing?” Carol asked playfully.

“What’s wrong? You don’t trust me?”

“Of course we do,” Gloria said. “Looks like Evan and Rindy are ready.”

They all looked to the boat where the kids were yelling at the adults to hurry up. Clearly _they_ were more than ready to be out on the lake.

“I already packed the cooler,” Therese said.

“She’s a keeper.” Bruce winked at Carol.

“Oh, I already know.”

They spent the next few hours on the boat and broke the news to Evan and Rindy that Therese was moving in. Rindy was excited to have a sibling, even if he wasn’t there full-time. Evan seemed to be more excited about the trampoline at Carol’s, but he didn’t seem to mind.

They all stayed two more nights and headed home. When they got back, Carol helped Therese move everything into her house. It took a couple of weeks, but when Carol wasn’t at the hospital, she was helping Therese with anything that she needed. Evan was even excited to decorate his new room. Once they were completely settled in, Carol was looking forward to a lot of sleep, but she was sure that Therese would have other plans in mind for their free time.

On a Saturday afternoon, Carol plopped down on the couch, completely worn out. Between working and moving, she was spent. She hoped that Therese would let her nap, for at least an hour. When Carol woke up, it was starting to get dark and the house was eerily quiet. Evan was with his father, Rindy was at a friend’s house and Carol had no idea where Therese was.

She rubbed her eyes and sat up. When she looked at her phone, it was 6:45. _Weird that Therese didn’t wake me up. Where is she?_ She walked to the kitchen, but didn’t find her there. However, she did find a note.

>   
>  Hey babe, wanted to let you sleep. I know you need it. I’m in the office, writing. Come find me when you wake up. Love you!  
> 

She smiled as she read it and walked down the hall to the office. She watched for a minute as Therese was busy typing away.

“Hey,” Carol said, softly.

“Hey yourself,” Therese said when she looked up at Carol.

“Still writing?”

“Almost finished.” Therese backed her chair away from the desk and patted her lap for Carol to sit.

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” Carol asked as she sat down on Therese’s lap.

“You needed your sleep.”

“It _did_ feel good to sleep.”

“And I have to admit that I didn’t want you to get the mail.”

“Hiding something from me, Miss Belivet?”

“Just a surprise.” Carol watched curiously as Therese opened a drawer in the desk and handed her a package.

“What’s this?”

“Open it.”

Carol took her time unwrapping the package, knowing that it was probably driving Therese mad. When she opened the box, she was surprised by what she saw.

“I wanted you to have the first copy.”

“You finished your book!”

“I did and it’s all yours.”

“Oh my god, I didn’t know that you finished it.”

“I was trying to keep it a secret. I hated telling you all those white lies when you’d ask me about it, but I wanted to surprise you.”

Carol opened the book and read the dedication.

>   
> Carol, my heart, my love. This is for you.  
> 

“Oh, sweetheart.” Carol’s eyes glistened with tears. “I can’t believe this. I’m so proud of you, baby.”

“Thank you.”

“I can’t wait to read this. Would you sign this for me?”

“Sure,” she said, giggling. “I feel like such a rockstar.”

“You are.”

Therese grabbed a marker and wrote in her book for Carol. She handed it back to her and Carol gave her a kiss. 

“Aren’t you going to read what I wrote?”

“Not yet. I’ll read it later. But I am really excited to finish reading this book. I’ve been dying to find out what happens.”

“It’s a romance novel – what do you think happens?”

“I know that, but it’s such a good story. I can’t wait to finish it.”

“I’m still surprised that you read lesbian romance novels.”

“Like I said before, you have a lot to learn about me. Are you still sure that you want to be here?” Carol smirked.

“Of course I do. I can’t wait to learn more.” Therese moved her hand under Carol’s shirt and she broke out in goosebumps. “Cold?” she asked with a devilish grin.

“Quite the opposite, actually.”

“Well, let’s go do something about that, shall we?”

“Do you need to finish writing?”

“You’re first on my list of things for today.”

“You’re just full of surprises today.”

“Are you hungry?”

“Starved,” Carol said in what she hoped was her most seductive voice.

“You’re insatiable.”

“I know.”

“I can fix you something to eat, if you want.”

“You don’t have to cook all the time, darling.”

“I know, but I like to cook for you,” Therese said with a gorgeous smile.

“Fine, you can cook. But I need to shower first.”

“Oooohh, I’d like to see that.”

“You’re welcome to shower with me, if you’d like.”

“I’ve already showered and besides that, I need to make you some dinner. Why don’t you take a hot bath?”

“I wish that you’d join me,” Carol said with a pout that she hoped Therese couldn’t resist.

“If you’re still in there when I’m done cooking, _maybe_ I’ll join you.”

“I think I can handle that.”

Carol took her book and went to the bathroom. There was already another surprise for her: a nice hot bath waiting for her, complete with bubbles. She undressed and climbed in, letting the water soothe her aching muscles. Having this bathtub put in her bathroom was one of the best decisions that she’d ever made. She laid her head back on the pillow and almost fell asleep again, but she heard the door open and looked up to see a naked Therese walking toward her.

“I thought you were cooking?”

“Did you really think that I’d run this bath and not join you?”

“Oh, so you had plans, huh?”

“Maybe. Care if I join you?”

“Please.”

Therese settled in-between Carol’s legs and rested her head on Carol’s shoulder. Carol was happy that they had the house to themselves. Since they’d moved in together, there hadn’t been much alone time for the both of them and she hated to have her parents keep Rindy just because she couldn’t control her hormones. But it was nice to be alone with Therese.

“This feels good,” Therese said as she closed her eyes.

“I couldn’t agree more.” Carol’s hands skimmed along Therese’s stomach and up to her breasts. The water was warm, but Therese’s nipples were hard and it made Carol smile. She pinched them and Therese moaned softly. 

“Can I be honest with you for a minute?” Therese asked.

“You don’t have to ask if you can be honest. You can always be honest with me, baby.”

“While what you’re doing feels so good, if you start something, I won’t be able to reciprocate. I’m so tired.”

“Sweetheart, you won’t always have to reciprocate. If you want me to stop, I will, but you can just lie back and enjoy it if you’d like. I’ll do all the work.” She kissed her softly on the cheek. “I don’t mind at all.” Carol slid a hand down Therese’s stomach and between her legs, causing Therese to open her legs wider. “Would you like me to continue?” she asked seductively as she circled her clit.

“Please don’t stop,” Therese begged, breathlessly. Her hand came up to the back of Carol’s neck and she held on tight while she rode out her orgasm against Carol’s nimble fingers.

“I love you so much, baby.”

“Oh Carol, I love you, too.”

Carol helped Therese get ready for bed since her legs were jelly and she was already tired. When Therese’s head hit the pillow, she fell asleep quickly. Since Carol wasn’t as tired because she had a nap earlier, she picked up her new book and decided to read. It was comforting to have Therese sleeping peacefully next to her while she read. The book was a mystery romance novel, not unlike anything that she had read before, but Therese’s storytelling skills were excellent and enough to keep her up reading well past two in the morning.

When she finished the book and turned out the light, she rolled onto her side and pulled Therese tight against her. This was exactly what she wanted in her life: Therese next to her when she went to bed tonight and every night from now on. Carol had missed the intimacy of sleeping with a woman that she loved and nothing beat the feeling of sleeping with Therese.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more chapter ...  
> :(


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bittersweet that this has come to an end. I hope you've all enjoyed it as much as I have!

_One Year Later_

Carol stood in her bedroom, nerves washing over her. She checked herself in the mirror once again as if she hadn’t done it ten times in the last thirty seconds. 

She wasn’t nervous for herself; she’d already been married once, but she hoped that this was truly what Therese had wanted. Not that she didn’t think Therese didn’t want to marry her, but Carol’s insecurities were getting the best of her. Honestly, what did she have to be insecure about? Therese was madly in love with her and she knew it. She shook the thoughts from her head.

“Nervous?” Abby asked, walking into the room.

“Just feeling slightly insecure.”

“Don’t worry yourself; she loves you and you know that. Just go out there and marry that beautiful woman,” Abby said as she put her arm around Carol’s shoulders. “Oh, you should see her, too. She’s gorgeous.”

“She’s always gorgeous.”

“You don’t look so bad yourself.”

“Are you sure? Should I have worn this?” Carol looked at herself in the mirror. She was wearing the tux that Therese had picked out. A decision that Therese had made, saying that she loved seeing Carol in a suit.

“Oh yeah, babe. You’re smokin’ hot in that thing. Therese knew what she was doing when she picked this out.” Abby was also wearing a tux similar to Carol’s since she was the best woman. “Besides, I look pretty damn good in this, too. Any eligible women gonna be at this wedding?”

“Oh, most definitely. There are a few from the hospital that are out there and I’m sure you could have your pick of any of them.”

“Well then, best not keep them waiting, or your bride for that matter.”

Carol made the decision that Therese would walk down the aisle since she had already done it once and wanted to give Therese the opportunity to do so. Bruce wasn’t even angry that he didn’t get to walk his daughter down the aisle. He couldn’t wait for the two of them to be married.

Abby followed Carol to the backyard where everyone was waiting for the ceremony to begin. When she took her position, Gloria gave her a wink and Bruce gave her an encouraging smile. Evan stood next to her as the ring bearer. Naturally, Rindy insisted on being the flower girl. It took some convincing from Carol for Evan to be in the wedding. His argument was that he didn’t want to stand up next to all those women in dresses and feel like an outsider. When Carol told him that she and Abby would be wearing tuxes, he changed his mind. Carol was proud to have him up there with her.

The music started and everything went quiet for Carol. She couldn’t wait to see Therese walking toward her. Rindy walked down first without a flaw, looking adorable and took her spot at Therese’s side and Carol gave her a wink. She swore that the little girl couldn’t have smiled bigger if she tried.

Next was Therese’s best friend, Amelia, accompanied by Abby. Carol had met her a few times and knew that Abby wouldn’t be able to take her eyes off of her. She was a voluptuous, long haired redhead; exactly Abby’s type. Carol knew that Amelia was gay, but hadn’t told Abby that yet. She wanted to surprise Abby with that piece of information. Abby helped Amelia get into place and stood next to Carol.

“You didn’t tell me that Amelia was fucking gorgeous,” Abby whispered to Carol.

“And she’s gay,” Carol whispered back.

For once, Abby Gerhard was speechless and Carol smirked, wondering what was going through Abby’s mind. No, she _knew_ what was going through Abby’s mind.

Finally, the moment she’d been waiting for came and Therese stood at the end of the aisle. She was a perfect vision in white and Carol watched as she walked down the aisle with her father.

When Therese was standing in front of her, Carol could feel the tears pricking the back of her eyes. Her life was absolutely perfect since Therese came back into it. Sure, they still had a lot to learn about each other, but she couldn’t wait to learn everything about her soon-to-be wife. 

The ceremony went by in a blur, but Carol would always remember the vows that they exchanged. They weren’t unlike the vows that she and Jenna exchanged, but were slightly altered because Therese _wasn’t_ Jenna.

* * *

Everyone seemed to be having a great time at the reception. Especially Abby since finding out that Amelia was gay and single. Shamelessly flirting was Abby’s special talent and she was laying it on thick, but it was definitely working. Carol knew that Abby wouldn’t be alone tonight, but Therese said that her best friend wasn’t that easy.

Carol happened to look over at her mother who was sitting next to Rindy. Something had clearly been bothering the little girl and Carol went to sit next to her.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Carol asked gently.

“Nothing,” Rindy said, not looking up and busying herself with picking at the side of her dress.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with her. She seemed happy earlier,” Gloria said.

“You want to talk about it, baby?”

“No,” Rindy said, shaking her head.

“How about we go inside?” Carol suggested, knowing that Rindy could be shy at times. Rindy only shrugged in response and Carol knew that meant yes. When they stepped inside alone, Carol knelt down to Rindy, but the little girl wouldn’t look at her. “Why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you, baby.”

“It’s just that … I thought Therese was going to be my other mom. You both asked me if that’s what I wanted.”

“We did,” Carol replied. In fact they had talked about it for a while and Therese was ecstatic about being Rindy’s other mother legally. It was something that Rindy also wanted.

“But she’s not,” Rindy said, pouting.

“Those things take some time. There’s a process that has to take place and papers to be signed,” Carol tried to explain.

“Yeah, but you planned the wedding and got married and she’s still not my mom.”

“Oh sweetheart, of course she is. All the rest is just paperwork.”

“Does …” Rindy’s lower lip began to quiver and tears started to fall. “Does she not want me?” she asked so softly as she cried and Carol pulled her into her arms. “She wanted to marry you, but she doesn’t want to be my mom.”

“Oh baby, of course she does. How could you ever think that she doesn’t?” Rindy’s only response was crying and Carol held her tighter. “She loves you so much, darling. I actually have a surprise for you that I think would make you feel a little better. Would you like to know what it is?”

“Hey,” Therese said when she came inside and Carol looked up at her. “What’s wrong?”

Carol pulled Rindy away from her and stood up. The little girl stood behind her mother, probably feeling ashamed, Carol assumed.

“Well, Rindy’s having some issues with the fact that you’re not technically her mother. I told her that it’s just a piece of paper and you _are_ her mother.”

“Oh no,” Therese said and went to Rindy, kneeling down to look at the little girl. “Rin, look at me.” She only made eye contact for a split second before looking at the ground again. “You _are_ my daughter. I don’t think of you as anything else. I love you so much.”

Carol kept an eye on the two while she pulled an envelope out of one of the drawers in the kitchen.

“Here,” Carol said and pulled the piece of paper out. “This was the surprise I was telling you about Rindy. This piece of paper starts the process for Therese to be your other mother,” she said softly and looked at Therese. “I was going to wait until later tonight to give you this …”

“You got it?” Therese asked, excitedly.

“I did,” Carol said, smiling.

“Rindy, do you know what this is?” Therese asked her and Carol handed the paper to Therese.

“No.”

“This piece of paper starts the process of me legally being your mother. It may take some time, but I’m all in with this. Besides that, now I’m your stepmother.” She showed it to Rindy. “It might take a while for it to happen, but I don’t need a piece of paper to say that I’m your mother. I feel it in here,” Therese said and pointed to her chest. “I love you, baby. Don’t you know that?” Therese pulled Rindy in for a hug and the little girl wrapped her arms around Therese’s neck.

“I don’t know,” she said, softly while the tears still streamed down her cheeks.

“Rindy, you _are_ my daughter. I don’t need a piece of paper to tell me otherwise. You’re my baby.” Therese held her tight while Carol looked on. The sight both warmed and broke her heart at the same time. 

Rindy was definitely Therese’s daughter. Sometimes it seemed that Therese was her biological mother because the two were alike in so many ways that it always amazed Carol. 

“I thought maybe you didn’t want me anymore,” Rindy whispered.

“Because me and your mother got married before I adopted you?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Oh baby, of course I want you. In fact, you’re stuck with me … forever. Are you sure you want that?” Therese asked, playfully as she tickled Rindy’s stomach and the little girl’s frown turned into a smile.

“Yes,” Rindy said through her laughter and tried to pull away from Therese, begging her to stop the tickling.

“Are you all right, sweetheart?” Therese asked as she wiped the tears from Rindy’s face.

“Yeah.”

“Good.” Therese kissed her cheek and gave her another hug.

“Therese?”

“Hmmm.”

“Can I stay here tonight? With you and Mommy? Grandma said that I couldn’t, but I wanna stay here tonight.”

Carol smiled at Rindy’s innocence. She didn’t know why she couldn’t spend the night, but Carol struggled with denying her daughter this simple request. She and Therese _should_ be alone tonight, but it’s not as if they had never had sex with the kids in the house and they would be alone for the next week and a half.

Therese looked up at Carol with a look that could only be described as turmoil. Carol smiled and nodded at Therese. How was she supposed to say no when the one thing that would comfort her daughter right now was staying home?

“Sure you can, Rin.”

“Yay!” Rindy exclaimed and just like that, Rindy’s fears seemed to be eased. She ran outside to tell her grandmother the news.

“I’m sorry,” Therese said when she stood in front of Carol.

“Don’t be.” Carol kissed her softly. “I’m happy that you could make her feel better. She loves you so much and I couldn’t be happier that she does.”

“I know we’re supposed to be alone tonight …”

“Stop,” Carol said, gently. “We have plenty of time alone coming soon enough. It’s fine, really.” She kissed Therese on the cheek. “Besides, I can still get you naked tonight after the kids go to sleep,” she whispered in her ear.

“The kids?”

“I’m assuming that Evan will want to stay. If Rindy’s here, I’d like him to be here, too. Wouldn’t you? I mean, after all, it’s a day to celebrate our little family, don’t you think?”

“Of course.”

“What the hell?” Abby asked when she walked into the kitchen.

“What?” Carol asked, wondering what got into her.

“You two are supposed to be alone tonight to have the fuck fest of your life and Rindy tells me that she’s staying here. So again, I ask, what the hell?”

“Calm down, Abby. Rindy was upset and I couldn’t say no to her. Besides, we’ll have plenty of time to be alone soon enough,” Carol said.

“Tell you what,” Abby said. “For the sake of ruining what I’ve started with that gorgeous redhead, I’ll take her for a few hours so the two of you can be alone. What do you say?”

“You’ll have to ask Rindy, but I’m sure she won’t go for it. I already told her that she could stay, so you’ll have to really make it worth her while. Oh, and you’ll probably have to take Evan too because I’m sure he’ll be staying as well,” Carol replied.

“Abby, my best friend is not that easy. You’re going to have to work for that one,” Therese said, smirking.

“Oh, I have my ways to make a woman cave.”

* * *

Carol didn’t how Abby was able to talk Rindy and Evan out of leaving the house, but Abby was good at that. She probably bribed both of the kids with candy or promises of something that Carol could only imagine. Abby actually managed to talk both of them into staying at Carol’s parents where they originally had planned. Carol knew that she owed Abby big time for that one.

“So, we’re all alone, huh?” Therese asked as she entered the bedroom.

“Seems that way.”

“And what would you like to do?” Therese asked seductively, standing in the doorway.

“I could think of a few things …” Carol raised and eyebrow.

Therese walked over to Carol and turned around. “Would you like to unzip me?”

“Gladly.” Carol stood up and unzipped her wife’s wedding dress. She smiled, thinking about Therese as her wife. She slid the dress off of Therese’s body and watched her wife slowly turn to her. “So you haven’t had any underwear on all day?” she asked with a smirk when she saw that Therese wore only a garter belt attached to her stockings under her dress.

“Nope,” she replied with a confident smile. 

“You little vixen. What am I going to do with you?”

“I can think of a few things,” Therese said as began undressing Carol. 

“Oh yeah? Like what?” Carol felt her heart start to pound when Therese removed her shirt and made her way to her pants. She unbuttoned the pants and slid her hand in Carol’s underwear. She lost her train of thought when Therese’s hand skated farther down to her wet lips.

“So many things,” Therese whispered in her ear. “Touch me.”

Carol moved her hand between Therese’s legs and found her just as wet as she was. “Fuck,” she whispered. With her other hand she pulled Therese towards her, kissing her hard. She moaned when Therese’s fingers found her clit and softly stroked.

She felt Therese guiding her backward and onto the bed. Therese slowly removed the rest of Carol’s clothes and climbed to straddle her hips. She looked up at Therese, unable to see anything but her sparkling green eyes.

“What?” Therese asked.

“I just can’t believe this is real,” Carol replied honestly. “I can’t believe that you married me. I’m the luckiest woman in the world.” Carol tried to keep it together, but a tear escaped.

Therese leaned down and kissed her softly. “Second luckiest,” she whispered. 

“Remind me again why you married me?” Carol asked playfully.

“Because you’re perfect for me and I love you more than anything.”

“Sounds good enough for me,” Carol said. “Make love to me, babe.”

“Absolutely.”

Therese took her time, licking, kissing and sucking a path down to Carol’s thighs. She teased her enough to make Carol beg and finally relented, putting her mouth exactly where Carol needed it and coaxed what would become one of many orgasms from her that night.

When they finally broke free from each other that night, they showered and climbed into bed. Carol smiled when Therese snuggled against her, their naked bodies pressed firmly together; a feeling that Carol would never tire of.

“So, your next book. What’s it going to be about?” Carol asked.

“Hmmm, I don’t know. Maybe about a woman who has a crush on another woman her entire life and finally gets to date her.”

“Sounds interesting. How does it end?”

“They get married and live happily ever after.”

“I like that ending.” Carol kissed her softly. “A lot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading, commenting and just being the most amazing readers that I could ask for. This was such a different story for me to write and I've enjoyed every minute of it. 
> 
> I do have another story in the works, but like this one, I'll be waiting until it's almost finished to post it.
> 
> Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!


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